“You don’t owe me a debt.” But having the option to return to the Golden Isles, and the extra time to recover, was a relief. A big relief. “But thank you. I’ll... keep it in mind.”
Niran went back to his post. Moon stayed by the railing, watching the reflections off the water, and listening to everyone sleep.
After a time, Chime wandered up out of the hatch, scratching his head. He spotted Moon at the railing and came over, saying with exasperated concern, “You’re not supposed to be up. If you get sick—”
Moon had remembered one of the questions he needed an answer to. “Do you know how Petal died?”
“Oh.”Chime hesitated. He stepped to the railing. “Yes, Bell told me.” He fidgeted uncertainly. “Do you want to go back down?”
“No, we’ll wake Flower and Heart. I want to stay up here.”
They sat down on baskets against the outside wall of the steering cabin because no one was sleeping there.
Chime told him that forty-seven Raksura had died in the attack on the colony, mostly soldiers, several Aeriat, and one teacher, Petal. Chime said miserably,“Bell said they were in the nurseries when the dakti broke in, and she just flung herself at them. She thought they were going to kill the clutches, and she was trying to give the other teachers a chance to carry them away. They did get some out of the nurseries, but the kethel had blocked the way outside, and they couldn’t shift, so they were trapped.”
Moon leaned against the cabin wall, not sure whether he was more sad or angry. Petal hadn’t had any reason to think that the dakti wouldn’t kill the clutches. And if she had known what plans the Fell had had for them, she might not have acted any differently.
“Do we know why the Fell left the bodies? Why they didn’t eat them?”
Chime looked troubled at the memory. “Not for certain, but Knell said the mentor-dakti was angry that so many of the court were killed. Maybe it was punishing the dakti by not letting them touch the bodies.”
Ranea had said Erasus wanted to go to the colony even though it wasn’t safe. “Maybe he watched you all so long he thought he was part of you.”
“Ugh,” Chime said, succinctly.
Moon wasn’t happy with that thought either. He changed the subject. “What about Balm?”
Chime shook his head. “She’s been staying on the other ship. She thinks this is all her fault.”
That was ridiculous. “It’s not her fault. She’s not responsible for what the Fell did to her.”
“Yes, and...” Chime prompted.
Moon frowned at him. “What?”
“Neither are you. I know you feel that way. You keep telling everyone that the Fell came for you. You could barely talk, and you told us that.”
Moon looked out over the railing, at the slowly approaching shore. Glowing night bugs played around the tops of the water-trees, sparking in the dark. He had told them because he wanted them to know, because he didn’t want their sympathy when they should be condemning him. “Chime...”
Exasperated, Chime said, “So it’s your fault for being born a consort and being alone, and making a good target. It’s Balm’s fault for getting caught by the Fell, and Pearl’s fault for trying to fend them off on her own, and Flower and the other mentors’ fault for not finding out what was wrong with the colony, and Stone’s fault for not coming back sooner to make us move, and Jade’s fault for being too young to force Pearl to act. I can go on. Sky Copper’s fault for being taken by surprise, and destroyed, and not being there to help us when we needed it.”
Moon twitched uneasily, wincing when the motion pulled at his abused muscles. “All right, I see what you mean,” he admitted, still begrudging it.
Chime sighed. “There’s some that won’t see it that way. But I don’t think you should be one of them.”
A low warm voice said, “Neither do I.”
Moon tilted his head back, gingerly, to look up. Jade was perched on the edge of the cabin roof, looking down at them, blue and silver in the moonlight.
He was going to answer, and then he sneezed, and the jolt shot right through him. He would have fallen off the basket, but Chime lunged forward and caught him around the waist. “See, this is why we didn’t want you out here. We’re susceptible to lung-ailments.”
Jade hopped down from the cabin roof and scooped Moon up in her arms. “I can walk,” he protested, trying to make it a growl. Admittedly, it was a pitiful growl.
“I know. But you don’t have to,” Jade said, and carried him back down below deck.
Moon got a little more sleep that night, and did not catch a lung ailment and die immediately, despite Chime and Heart’s dire predictions. But the morning seemed to stretch on forever. The good thing about being semi-conscious was that it had kept him from being bored. Now that he was alert again, there was nothing to do but sit around and wait to get well enough to shift.
In the afternoon, Stone brought Frost, Thorn, and Bitter again, which was a welcome diversion. Bitter and Thorn play-stalked each other, growling in a way that made them sound like furious bees, while Frost sat aloof and Stone said things like, “Do not flap your wings in here. You’ll kill somebody.”
People had been moving around up on deck all day, and Moon had mostly ignored it. From what he could glimpse, it was a bright clear day and everyone would be out enjoying it. Then he felt the boat slow, the wood creaking and groaning in protest. Moon shoved himself up on his good arm. “What’s that?”
The fledglings must have heard the tension in his voice. They all froze, heads cocked to listen, but Stone looked unconcerned. “They’re slowing down and pulling over to the other boat, so the whole court can have a meeting.”
Reassured by Stone’s attitude, Frost settled her spines. The consorts went back to their game, Thorn rolling onto his back so Bitter could pounce on him. Moon frowned at the ceiling. He was missing everything down here. “A meeting about what?”
Stone tugged on Frost’s frills. Apparently feeling that her dignity was being abused, she ducked away and batted at his hand. Stone said, “About you, Moon.”
“About—oh.” Moon sank back into the cushions. He must have looked just as uneasy as he felt, because Frost came over and sat on the pallet next to him. Moon asked, “Why aren’t you up there?”
“Everybody already knows what I think,” Stone said. If Moon was supposed to know what that was, he had no idea. Stone wore his best unreadable expression. “Besides, Jade and Pearl are going to fight, and I don’t want them to postpone it on my account.”
“A fight?” Moon stared at him, incredulous and beginning to get mad. “And you’re not going to do anything about it?”
Stone snorted. “Moon, queens fight. It’s normal. And these two have a lot of disagreements to work out.” He shrugged. “It’ll be fine. The Arbora wouldn’t like it if they went too far, and they both know it.”
Moon looked at the ceiling again. He couldn’t hear anything but movement, and muffled voices. “It matters that much to them what the Arbora think?”
Stone leaned over to help Bitter pry his trapped claws out of a floorboard.
“I told you, the Arbora run the court. They find food, raise the clutches, help fight, make everything we need. They don’t like it if queens fight too much, or if consorts are unhappy.”
Moon’s shoulder was throbbing again and he made himself relax, leaning back on the cushions. “So if the Arbora wanted me to stay, Pearl couldn’t force me out?”
Stone sighed in exasperation. “Moon, Pearl wants you as her consort. That’s what they’re going to fight about.”
It was either a joke, or Stone actually was crazy. “Pearl hates me. A lot.”