My first thought was that she is one weird fucking human. Then questions arose.
1. Is she an escaped mental patient?
2. Does she really want me to pay for her food?
3. Would she really give me a blowjob for paying for her food?
4. If I pay for her food, how much of a tip should I leave?
5. Do I want a blowjob from this crazy human?
I said, “Yeah, I’ll pay for your food for a blowjob.”
She smiled.
I paid for my coffee and her food and left.
We went to the dirty motel down the street.
It was one of those motels where people live, sex is purchased, crack is smoked and spouses are cheated on.
It was perfect for this.
We went into the room.
She immediately took off her clothes and I took off mine.
She began sucking my dick.
But I couldn’t focus.
There was something terrifying about this whole event.
There was something terrifying about her.
She was crazy, on crack or something.
Something miserable about her.
Something too miserable.
I couldn’t get off.
She offered to put it in her pussy.
But she wasn’t wet enough.
I couldn’t understand her intentions.
Maybe that was the problem.
She might have been crazy and on crack but she still wanted sex, and that’s why she offered it because buying chicken tenders for somebody does not constitute prostitution.
Maybe she was schizophrenic or a feral child.
I lost the need for an orgasm and started thinking about the horror of living.
The horror of living exists for everyone. If anything ties the people of the world together, it is that unceasing horror.
I decided to leave.
Put my clothes on.
Offered her a ride home but she said she would stay in the motel all night.
She asked me if I had a lighter.
I gave her the only one I had.
She lay on the bed with one light on.
She smiled at me.
I smiled back.
Then left.
Got in my car and drove back to Denny’s to read About Behaviorism.
That was a strange experience.
XXX THEATER
One day I was really bored.
I had the urge to try something new.
Something totally weird.
I heard there was a XXX theater in the Westside of Youngstown.
I had always wanted to go.
So I went.
I drove there.
It was in a shitty neighborhood.
All of Youngstown is shitty.
Youngstown was at its best fifty years ago.
Since then no one has had enough money to build anything new.
There’s not even a legitimate grocery store in Youngstown.
Nobody has had money in Youngstown for a long time.
You could tell it had been a real theater at one point.
Where Citizen Kane and Asphalt Jungle had played.
But there were no more movie theaters in Youngstown.
There was nothing in Youngstown.
I parked the car on the side of the building and got out.
There was a fat man sitting in his car looking around.
I walked past his car and went in.
There was a small porn store in the front.
There was an old woman at the counter.
She was very polite and said, “How you doing today?”
I said, “Fine, how are you?”
She said, “I’m good. Nine dollars for the movie.”
I handed her money and went in.
There were men standing at the top of the walkways into the theater.
They were normal-looking men.
They looked like factory workers and schoolteachers.
I assumed they were waiting for someone to come over and offer a blowjob.
I had to go piss so I asked someone where the bathroom was.
He directed me upstairs.
Went up creepy steps to the bathroom.
There was a long hallway that led to a lounge.
There was a couch with an ashtray next to it.
That room led to the bathroom.
I went to the urinal, unzipped and started to piss.
In front of the urinals was a white poster board covered in writing.
“10–09 left side of theater suck your dick.”
“I love huge black cock 555-5467.”
“I love fat cocks getting hard in my mouth.”
“Left side of theater, suck your dick.”
“Suck your sick, suck your dick, suck your dick, suck your dick, suck your dick.”
I had seen this before at truck stops, so I wasn’t surprised.
When I was washing my hands a large black man walked in.
He looked at me and I looked at him.
We had a moment.
I went downstairs.
Sat on the left side of the theater.
Had no idea if that meant anything.
I knew that homosexuals had an intricate system of signs to communicate what they wanted. I could have been sitting in the “Urinate on my face section.”
Didn’t know. Didn’t care.
I watched the movie for a while.
It was an old porn.
There were two males and one female.
The two males took the female’s clothes off.
Then one male took the other male’s clothes off.
Then that male started sucking the other male’s dick.
It was evident to me that I was in a very weird location.
I didn’t mind watching the two men suck each other off and fuck.
The female was cute and so was one of the males.
I looked around and saw the big guy from the bathroom sitting five seats away from me.
I looked directly at him for ten seconds and he motioned me over.
He wanted me to suck his dick.
I hadn’t sucked a dick in a long time.
But fuck, if you’re going to go somewhere weird.
You should be weird too.
I got up, walked over, and sat next to him.
He put his large hand on my thigh.
I’m like five eight and one hundred and ninety pounds. He was like six three and two hundred and fifty pounds.
Was very daunted by his size.
He had an attractive face and I started to get turned on.
He whispered, “Would you like to suck my cock?”
I was like, “All right.”
He unzipped his pants and pulled out his cock.
It was fucking huge.
It was six inches long and three inches wide.
And it was still flaccid.
I picked it up, leaned over and put it in my mouth.
It felt nice in my mouth.
All soft and big.
Licked it all over.
Tried to remember things females did that I liked.
I went deep as I could, but I couldn’t get very far.
It got harder and harder.
But it never got fully hard.
It would have sucked too much blood out of his brain and caused him to pass out.
I liked sucking his cock in that dark theater.
I liked wrapping my fingers around it, feeling that massive piece of sex in my hand.
I sucked and sucked.
Eventually he blew his load right in my mouth.
It was a massive fucking load.
I thought I was going to vomit.
But I swallowed it down.
Sat up, looked at him and smiled.
He said, “There’s some cum on your bottom lip.”
I licked it off and said, “Is it gone?”
He said, “Yes.”