PLATONOV. I won’t end it, because I never started it!
ANNA PETROVNA. Eh . . . despicable sophistry! And aren’t you ashamed to tell lies? On such a night, under such a sky . . . and you tell lies? Lying is for autumn, if you must, in the mud, in the slush, but not now, not here . . . You’re being overheard, you’re being watched . . . Look up there, you crackpot!
Pause.
Up there the stars are twinkling that you are lying . . . Enough, my dear! Be as nice as all outdoors! Don’t spoil this stillness with your own petty ego . . . Chase away your demons! (Embraces him with one arm.) There’s no one I could ever have loved as I love you! No woman you could ever have loved as you love me . . . Let’s take for ourselves nothing but this love, and all the rest, which tortures you so, let others worry about . . . (Kisses him.) Let’s take for ourselves nothing but this love . . .
PLATONOV. Odysseus deserved to have the sirens sing to him, but I’m not King Odysseus, siren!67 (Embraces her.) If only I could make you happy! How lovely you are! But I won’t make you happy! I’ll make you what I’ve made all the other women who threw themselves at me . . . I’ll make you unhappy!
ANNA PETROVNA. What a high opinion you have of yourself! Are you really so dangerous, Don Juan? (Roars with laughter.) How good-looking you are in the moonlight! Magnificent!
PLATONOV. I know myself! The only romances with happy endings are the ones I’m not in . . .
ANNA PETROVNA. Let’s sit down . . . Over here . . . (They sit on the railroad tracks.) What else do you have to say, philosopher?
PLATONOV. If I were an honest man, I would leave you . . . I had a foreboding of this today, I foresaw it . . . Why didn’t I, scoundrel that I am, go away?
ANNA PETROVNA. Chase away your demons, Michel! Don’t poison yourself . . . After all, it’s a woman who came to you, not a beast . . . A glum face, tears in his eyes . . . Pooh! If you don’t like this, I shall leave . . . Want me to? I’ll leave, and everything will stay just as it was before . . . Shall I? (Roars with laughter.) Nincompoop! Take, snatch, grab! . . . What more do you want? Smoke me to the end like a cigarette, stub me out, cut me up into little pieces . . . Be a man! (Pushes him around.) Funny fellow!
PLATONOV. But are you really mine? Are you really meant for me? (Kisses her hands.) Go to somebody else, my dear . . . Go to a man who deserves you . . .
ANNA PETROVNA. Ah . . . Will you stop talking rubbish! After all, it’s a very simple matter: a woman has come to you, who loves you and whom you love . . . The weather is superb . . . What could be simpler? What’s the point of all this philosophy, politics? Are you trying to put on an act?
PLATONOV. Hm . . . (Gets up.) What if you came here to trifle with me, lead me down the garden path, put one over on me? . . . What then? I’m not available for part-time jobs . . . I won’t let myself be toyed with! You won’t be able to pay me off with pennies, as you’ve paid off scores of others! . . . I’m too expensive for short-term affairs . . . (Clutches his head.) To respect, to love you and at the same time . . . the triviality, vulgarity, a philistine, plebeian game!
ANNA PETROVNA (walks up to him). You love me, respect me, then why are you, you restless soul, haggling with me, talking this filth to me? Why all these “if”s? I love you . . . I told you, and you know yourself that I love you . . . What more do you want? Serenity is what I want . . . (Puts her head on his chest.) Serenity . . . Understand me at last, Platonov! I want to rest . . . To forget, and not need anything else . . . You don’t know . . . You don’t know how oppressive my life is, and I . . . want to live!
PLATONOV. But I’m not able to provide serenity!
ANNA PETROVNA. Just try and stop philosophizing! . . . Live! Everything lives, everything moves . . . Life is all around . . . Let us live too! Tomorrow solve the problems but today, tonight, live, live . . . Live, Michel!
Pause.
Actually, why am I warbling away to you? (Roars with laughter.) Tell me, please! I’m singing, while he’s giving me a hard time.
PLATONOV (grasps her by the hand). Listen . . . For the last time . . . As a man of honor I’m telling you . . . Go away! For the last time! Go away!
ANNA PETROVNA. You mean it? (Roars with laughter.) You’re not joking? . . . You’re being silly, pal! Now I’ll never leave you! (Throws her arms around his neck.) You hear? For the last time I’m telling you: I won’t let you go! Come what may, no matter what! Even if you destroy me, even if you ruin yourself, I’ll have you! Live! Tra-ta-ta-ta . . . ra-ra-ra . . . Why tear yourself away, you crackpot? You’re mine! Now preach your philosophy!
PLATONOV. Once more . . . As a man of honor . . .
ANNA PETROVNA. If I can’t get you honorably, I’ll take you by force . . . Love me, if you do love me, but don’t behave like a fool! Tra-ta-ta-ta . . . “The bells peal out in victory . . .”68 You’re mine, you’re mine! (Tosses a black kerchief over his head.) You’re mine!
PLATONOV. Yours? (Laughs.) You shallow woman! You aren’t doing yourself any good . . . There’ll be tears, after all! I won’t be your husband, because you weren’t meant for me and I won’t let myself be toyed with . . . We’ll see who’ll toy with whom . . . We’ll see . . . You’ll be in tears . . . Let’s go, shall we?
ANNA PETROVNA (roars with laughter). Allons!69 (Takes him by the arm.) Wait . . . Someone’s coming. Let’s stand behind that tree a while . . . (Hides behind the tree.) Someone in a frockcoat, not a peasant . . . Why don’t you write editorials for the newspapers? You’d be great at it . . . No fooling.
Enter TRILETSKY.
SCENE VII
The same and TRILETSKY.
TRILETSKY (walks toward the school and knocks on the window). Sasha! Little sister! Sashurka!
SASHA (opens the window). Who’s there? Is that you, Kolya? What’d you want?
TRILETSKY. You’re not in bed yet? Let me spend the night, dear heart!
SASHA. Make yourself at home . . .
TRILETSKY. You can put me in the classroom . . . But for pity’s sake don’t let Misha find out that I’m sleeping over: he and his philosophy won’t let me get a wink! My head’s swimming something awful . . . I’m seeing double . . .I stand in front of one window, but it looks as though there’s two: which should I crawl through? Call an inquest! Good thing I’m not married! If I were married, I’d think I was a bigamist . . . I’m seeing double! You’ve got two heads on two necks! By the way, incidentally . . . Over by that felled oak, the one by the river—you know it? — I blew my nose, ladybird, and forty rubles dropped out of my handkerchief . . . Pick them up, dear heart, first thing tomorrow . . . Finders keepers.