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Robin looked surprised. Such as?

Id been up half the night with it. I had all the page references at my fingertips. Page 211 for a start.

I handed the offending page across the Cabinet table to Robin. He stared at the section Id marked through his half-moon gold-rimmed reading glasses, then stared at me coldly over the top of them. It only says that the Minister for Administrative Affairs supported the proposal to expand the Sellafield nuclear fuel plant in Cabinet, but spoke out against it in public.

I was amazed that he couldnt see the problem. But that was me! I was the Minister.

The point is, Prime Minister, its not a security leak.

The point is, I responded indignantly, its not true!:

The documentation is fairly impressive, he replied dispassionately. [Fairly impressive is Whitehall code for irrefutable Ed.]

His cold blue eyes seemed to twinkle with amusement. But I couldnt see anything funny. With respect, Prime Minister, he continued insultingly, if he has labelled you, thats a matter for the courts after publication, not for security clearance before it.

I disagreed flatly. Its not as if the only problem is on page 211. Page 224 has a scurrilous accusation about my stopping that chemical plant project because of a baseless press scare. Then theres an indefensible passage about me on page 231.

Humphrey took the opportunity to read that bit aloud -- needlessly, I now feel. Hacker was more interested in votes than principles. He ran for cover at the first whiff of unpopularity. He raised the average age of the Cabinet but lowered the average IQ.

Thank you, Humphrey, weve all read it, I said tartly. I couldnt help feeling that around this table there was more than a little pleasure at my discomfiture.

Robin hesitated, then spoke again. He expressed himself carefully. Well, as I say, Prime Minister, Im not in any way supporting or defending him, but its not an actual security breach. After all, Chapter Five got leaked to the press and we took no action.

Hed missed the point. Chapter Five was very nice about my getting the Qumran contract, I explained. And about my computer security guidelines.

But, Robin persisted, it had just as much confidential material. And you never even had a leak enquiry about it.

They all stared at me. Did they know? Anyone could have leaked that chapter to the press, I remarked, with as much innocence as I could muster.

Anyone! agreed Humphrey emphatically.

Chapter Five had been in no way comparable. I turned back to the beginning of the manuscript. Look at the title of this chapter, I exclaimed in anguish.

Humphrey read it aloud again. The Two Faces of Jim Hacker?

Thats not a secret, surely? Bernard was trying to make me feel better -- I think! He caught my eye and fell silent.

I returned to the attack. Im sorry, I think that there are security implications. Sellafield is nuclear.

The Solicitor-General shook his head. But the Energy Secretary is responsible for Sellafield, he has seen the chapter, and he says that he has no problems.

Of course he has no problems. It describes him as the ablest minister in the Cabinet. Which in itself is another slur on me. I pointed this out to Robin, who replied legalistically that he didnt think it was actionable.

I was tired of all this obstructionism. Lets be clear about this. We have the right to refuse publication, dont we?

Robin nodded. We do. But if they ignore us and publish anyway, my legal opinion is that we shall have no hope of stopping it through the courts.

This was a blow. I suggested that, in that case, we lean on the publishers. The Solicitor-General wanted to know on what grounds. I told him the national interest.

Again he defied me! But Ive said that theres no grounds

I cut him off. Listen, I said sharply. This is obscene, scurrilous filth. It cannot be in the national interest to publish it and undermine confidence in the leader of the nation. This chapter must not be published. Right?

They all gazed at me bleakly. The meeting broke up. They hadnt said yes and they hadnt said no. But they know what they have to do.

[Events moved fast. Only a week later a report appeared in the Daily Post , Londons newest morning newspaper, that Hacker was trying to suppress a chapter of his predecessors memoirs. And the story quoted freely from the chapter, printing verbatim the sections that Hacker had found most objectionable Ed.]

Daily Post

Friday 3 August

HACKER ATTEMPTS TO SUPPRESS MEMOIRS

Foiled by Solicitor-General

by our political staff

Prime Minister Jim Hacker, in a secret meeting at Number Ten Downing Street last week, tried to suppress the eighth chapter of the as yet untitled memoirs of former Prime Minister Herbert Attwell. The manuscript was sent to the Cabinet Office for security clearance in the usual way.

[An anxious meeting took place in Bernard Woolleys office at 9 a.m. on the morning the story hit the streets. Present were Bernard Woolley, Sir Humphrey Appleby and Malcolm Warren, the Press Secretary at Number Ten Downing Street. A note of the meeting appears in Sir Humphrey Applebys diary Ed.]

Friday 3 August

B.W., M.W. and I conferred about the story in the Daily Post. We knew that even if the P.M. had not yet read his daily press digest, he would have heard it quoted on the Today show, to which he always listens while he has his breakfast. B.W. remarked that he had listened too. The presenters had chewed up Hacker for breakfast!

We all regarded it as a somewhat amusing and trivial embarrassment of no particular consequence. The only problem, other than the P.M.s discomfiture (which was not a problem), was that the leak not only quoted from Chapter Eight but revealed that Hacker tried to suppress it, which means that the leak must have come from someone who was at the meeting.

Malcolm had an immediate problem: half of Britains press corps were in the press office waiting for Hackers response, and the other half were on the phone. The foreign press have also picked it up, and there have been interview requests from Le Monde, the Washington Post, and the Womens Wear Daily -- which, Malcolm tells me, is an important newspaper across the pond. Thank God we do not live in a matriarchy.

[Appleby Papers 1540/BA/90077]

[Hackers diary continues Ed.]

August 3rd

Humphrey, Bernard and Malcolm trooped in as if they were in mourning. Grave faces. Eyes lowered. I stared at them angrily.

Well? I asked.

There was a silence.

Well? I asked again.

They stared intently at their shoes. Say something, I snarled.

There was a pause. Finally Bernard spoke up. Good morning, Prime Minister, he mumbled.

Good morning, the others echoed, apparently grateful to Bernard for having thought of something safe to say.

I banged the Daily Post. Youve read this?

They all produced copies of it from under their arms or behind their backs.

You realise what this is? I asked. I pointed at the story.

Its the Daily Post, said Bernard unnecessarily.

Its a catastrophe! Thats what it is!

Humphrey cleared his throat. With respect, Prime Minister

I let him get no further. With no respect at all, Humphrey. I was very curt. No respect for privacy. No respect for security. No respect for the national interest. No respect for the elected leader of the nation. This is unforgiveable! Who leaked it?

More silence. I waited. Who can say? was Humphreys eventual and feeble response.