The King thought she was referring to William of Orange. She had made some reference to William—again, if only she had a transcript!—and a moment later she had changed the subject and said she wanted to find the man who had wronged her, and kill him—and the King had put those two truths together to make a falsehood: his majesty now believed that Eliza's goal in life was to assassinate William! That she had spied on William's behalf only as a ruse so that she could get close to him.
She spun around, hoping to find the King, to get his attention, to explain all—but found herself looking into the face of a man dressed all in red. Jean Bart, putting his corsair skills to use, had hacked his way through a throng of female admirers to reach Eliza. "Mademoiselle," he said, "Madame la duchesse has announced that this is to be the last dance. If I might have the honor?"
She let her hand float up and he took it. "Normally, of course, I should make way for Étienne d'Arcachon in such a case," he explained, in case Eliza had been wondering about this—which she hadn't. "But he is outside, bidding farewell to the King."
"The King's leaving?"
"Is already in his carriage, mademoiselle."
"Oh. I had been hoping to say something to him."
"You and everyone else in France!" They were dancing now. Bart was amused. "You have already danced with his majesty! Mademoiselle, there are women in this room who have sacrificed babies in the Black Mass hoping to conjure up a single word, or a glance, from the King! You should be satisfied—"
"I don't want to hear about such things," Eliza said. "It makes me cross that you would even mention such horrors. You have been drinking, Captain Bart."
"You are right and I am wrong. I shall make it up to you: As it happens, I shall see the King in a few hours—I have been summoned to his levée! We will discuss naval finance. Is there anything you would like me to pass on to his majesty?"
What could she say? I don't really mean to kill William of Orange was not the sort of message she could ask Captain Bart to blurt out at the levée; nor was I don't really know precisely who it is I mean to kill.
"It is sweet of you to offer and I do forgive you. Does the King talk much at his levées, I wonder?"
"How should I know? Ask me tomorrow. Why?"
"Does he gossip, tell stories? I am curious. For I told him something, just now, that, if it were to get around, would make me very unpopular in England."
"Pfft!" said Jean Bart, and rolled his eyes, dispensing with the entire subject of England.
"Do ask the King one thing for me, please."
"Only name it, mademoiselle."
"The name of a physician who is good down here." She let her hand slide down a few inches and patted him. She did it with exquisite caution. But nonetheless Jean Bart yelped and jumped, his face split open in agony. Eliza gasped and jumped back in horror; but his grimace relaxed into a smile, and he lunged after her and snared her back, for he was only joking.
"I have already been to see such a physician."
"That is good," said Eliza, still laughing, "for I would see you sit down before you go home."
"Fifty-two hours of rowing did its damage, this is true; but this physician has been at my arse with all manner of poultices, and unmentionable procedures, and I am healing well. And this is the best bandage of all!" brushing some lint from the epaulet of his new red coat.
"If only all wounds could be healed by putting on new clothes, monsieur!"
"Don't all women believe this to be true?"
"Sometimes they behave as if they did, Captain Bart. Perhaps I simply have not picked out the right dress yet."
"Then you should go shopping tomorrow!"
"It is a fine thought, Captain. But first I need some money. And as there is none in France, you must go out to sea and capture some gold for me."
"Consider it done! I owe it to you!"
"Try to keep that in mind tomorrow, Jean Bart."
JANUARY–FEBUARY 1690
Mademoiselle de la Zeur,
Thank you for yours of December '89. It took some time crossing the Channel, and I daresay this shall fare no better. I was touched by your expression of concern, and amused by the narrative of the timber. I had not appreciated how fortunate England is in this respect, for if we want timber in London, we need only denude some part of Scotland or Ireland where a few trees still stand.
I would be of help to you in your quest to understand money, if for no other reason than that I would understand it myself. But I am perfectly useless. Our money has been wretched for as long as I have been alive. When it is so bad, it is no easy matter to discern when it is getting worse; but hard as it might be to believe, this seems to be occurring. I was bedridden for some months following the removal of my Stone, and did not have to go out and buy things. But when I had recovered sufficiently that I could venture out once again, I found it clearly worse. Or perhaps the long time spent not having to haggle over daily purchases, lifted the scales from my eyes, so that the absurdity of the situation was made clear to me.
I keep running accounts at several coffee-houses, pubs, and a bottle-ale house in my street, so that every small purchase need not be attended by a tedious and irksome transfer of coin. Many who go out more often than I do have formed together into societies, called Clubbs, which facilitate purchase of food, drink, snuff, pipe-tobacco, &c., on credit. When, through some miracle, one comes into possession of coins recognizable as such, one runs out and tries to settle one's more important accounts. The system staggers along. People do not know any better.
Here we have Whigs and Tories now. In essence these are, respectively, Roundheads and Cavaliers, under new guises, and less heavily armed. Tories get their money from the land that they own. To simplify matters greatly, one might say that France is a country consisting entirely of Tories; for all of the money there derives ultimately from the land. You might have had Whigs too, if you'd not expelled the Huguenots. And some of your Atlantic seaports are said to be a bit Whiggish. But as I said, I am over-simplifying to make a point: If you understand how money works in France, then you know everything about our Tories. And if you understand how it works in Amsterdam, then you know our Whigs.
The Royal Society dwindles, and may not last to the end of the century. It no longer enjoys the favor of the King as it did under Charles II. In those days it was a force for revolution, in the new meaning of that word; but it succeeded so well that it has become conventional. The sorts of men who, having no other outlet for their ideas, would have devoted their lives to it, had they come of age when I did, may now make careers in the City, the Colonies, or in foreign adventures. We of the Royal Society are generally identified as Whigs. Our President is the Marquis of Ravenscar, a very powerful Whig, and he has been assiduous in finding ways to harness the ingenuity of the Fellows of the Royal Society for practical ends. Some of these, I gad, have to do with money, revenue, banks, stocks, and other subjects that fascinate you. But I must confess I have fallen quite out of touch with such matters.
Isaac Newton was elected to Parliament a year ago, in the wake of our Revolution. He had made a name for himself in Cambridge opposing the former King's efforts to salt the University with Jesuits. He spent much of the last year in London, to the dismay of those of us who would prefer to see him turn out more work in the vein of Principia Mathematica. He and your friend Fatio have become the closest of companions, and share lodgings here.
POST-SCRIPT—FEB. 1690
After I wrote the above, but before I could post this, King William and Queen Mary prorogued and dissolved Parliament. There have been new elections and the Tories have won. Isaac Newton is no longer M.P. He divides his time between Cambridge, where he toils on Alchemy, and London, where he and Fatio are reading Treatise on Light by our friend and erstwhile dinner-companion Huygens. All of which is to say that I am now even more useless to you than I was a month ago; for I am in a failing Society linked to a Party that has lost power and that has no money, there being none in the kingdom to be had. Our most brilliant Fellow devotes himself to other matters. It were presumptuous of me to expect a reply to a letter as devoid of useful content as this one; but it would have been insolent of me to have failed to respond to yours; for I am, as always, your humble and obedient servant—