“And even so we could not marry.”
“Popes are very amenable to a bribe.”
“And Constance?”
“Ah,” he said. “There is Antioch. But you could stay here. Divorce Louis and you will still be Duchess of Aquitaine. You and I could return now and then to our native land.”
I pictured it. Raymond and I together at the Court of Poitiers, lying on cushions, entertained by jongleurs, singing our songs to each other.
It was an impossible dream. And those visits to Aquitaine? We should have to make the long journeys across hostile country. The idea of doing that again filled me with horror: And how could I go back with my uncle as my lover ... and would Constance, the heiress of Antioch, allow us to?
But it was pleasant to dream. Sometimes, when I look back, my stay in Antioch seems like a dream ... a dream from which I had to wake inevitably in time to harsh reality.
In between our bouts of fierce love-making we talked. Raymond took me completely into his confidence and was as frank as he would have been with his most important ministers. He told me of his concern for Antioch and how he planned to strengthen the city. It was the gateway to Jerusalem. Christendom should remember that.
He said: “I am going to put a proposition to Louis and his advisers. Soon he will be talking of moving on. There is no doubt that the whole company is in better health than it was when it arrived. Those who plan crusades do not always realize the need for safe havens on the road to Jerusalem where crusaders can stay for a respite, to deal with their sick and wounded, to replenish their packhorses. It is nonsense to raise such money—much of which is lost on the way and falls into the hands of the enemy—and to ignore the ports of call. Louis should have taken Constantinople.”
“It was suggested by the Bishop of Langres, but Louis was so eager to proceed with the journey to Jerusalem.”
“As I say, there is a lack of foresight.”
“He would believe the best of Manuel Comnenus. Louis believes the best of everyone until something is proved against them. He would not accept the fact of Manuel’s treachery until he saw Conrad himself bleeding and wounded, and heard what had happened from his lips.”
“He must be made to understand. Even here in Antioch we live in habitual fear. We are surrounded by the enemies of Christianity. It is known that Christians find refuge here. The Saracens have their headquarters at Aleppo. From there they send out their men to harry the Christians. What we need is to take Aleppo and make it a safe haven for Christians. What a missed opportunity not to take Constantinople. The French army was in a good condition then. They could easily have taken it. It would have been a great victory for Christendom.”
“You would like to see Manuel Comnenus defeated?”
“I would indeed. That Greek is as much our enemy as the Saracens themselves. Of course he betrayed the Germans. He would have been delighted if they had all been destroyed. We of Antioch are his vassals. He could take us tomorrow if he were minded to. Why cannot people see that if we are going to hold Jerusalem we must make the route safe? I should like to see a string of cities all along the road to the Holy City ... all in the hands of the Christians.”
“In France and Europe generally they have no conception of what traveling is like. They think it compares with taking a journey across France ... and even that can be dangerous. But they have no idea what it is really like.”
“Louis should have. He has experienced it.”
“Are you going to suggest this to Louis?”
“In due course. Perhaps you could prepare him.”
“I think there will be little hope of convincing him. He is determined to go to Jerusalem. He thinks that only when he is in the Holy City, when he kneels at the shrine, will his sins be washed away and he be able to forget Vitry.”
“Nevertheless, speak to him. Make him see that we must make the way safe for Christians.”
“What do you propose? That you join forces with him and march against Aleppo?”
He nodded. “It is essential that we destroy the Saracen stronghold. You have some wise men among you. The Bishop of Langres, for instance. He saw the need to capture Constantinople.”
“If you were successful in capturing Aleppo, he would want to march on to Jerusalem. What then of us?”
“You could stay behind.”
“If only that could be!”
“My dearest love, one does not say ‘If’: one knows what one wants and says ‘I will.’”
I could believe that with my powerful lover. I was sure he was capable of achieving anything. The only thing I could not bear to contemplate was parting from him.
I sought out Louis.
“What are your plans?” I said.
He replied that we were to leave Antioch in the very near future.
“Did you know that at Aleppo, not very far from here, the Saracens have their stronghold? It is from there that parties are sent out to attack Christians. When we leave Antioch, we shall have to endure what we did before.”
“We knew the road was not easy. You should not have come. It is no place for women.”
“From what I have seen it is no place for men either. The way should be made safe for Christians.”
“Life is not meant to be easy.”
“What nonsense. Life is meant to be enjoyed, and if the way to Jerusalem can be made easier, it is folly not to make it so. There should be more places where pilgrims and crusaders could be sure of a haven. It should be our aim to make it so.”
“My aim is to go to Jerusalem and kneel at the shrine ... to confess my sins and ask for absolution.”
“I am sure it would please God more if you helped to make the way safe for those who go to worship Him. There should be more places like Antioch on the way.”
A look of derision curved Louis’s lips. “Places like Antioch!” he cried. “What is this place? It is given over to pleasure. Life is soft and easy here. That is not the good life.”
“Why then did God make such a place where living is easy and comfortable and the fruits of the Earth grow in abundance?”
“You are bemused by this place.”
“Who would not delight in it after all we have suffered? It seems sensible to me to make the way easier for those who come after us. We should have taken Constantinople.”
“It was not what we came for.”
“We allowed the treacherous Greek Manuel Comnenus to destroy Conrad’s army. If we had gone first, it might have been ours.”
“Our plan was to go to Jerusalem.”
“But for the hospitality of my uncle we should all be dead by now.”
“We should have died in a holy endeavor.”
I sighed impatiently. “Can’t you see that God is showing us what to do?”
“I doubt God would show you.”
“He showed the Bishop. Remember how he urged you to take Constantinople?”
I noticed Thierry Galeran in the room. He sat so quietly that one was hardly aware of him. I was irritable suddenly. “Can I never be alone with you, Louis?” I said.
“You are alone.”
“What of that ... er ... person?”
“Galeran is always here.”
Galeran rose and bowed. I could see the dislike in his eyes. “My lady, it is my duty to protect the King on every occasion.”
“What do you think he has to fear from me?”
He lowered his eyes as though he were afraid to meet mine.
“You may leave me with the Queen,” said Louis. “Wait outside the door.”
Galeran bowed once more and left.
“That creature ... one can hardly call him a man ... annoys me.”
“He is a good and faithful servant.”
“You take too much notice of him.”
“Not only is he noted for his strength but his intellect.”
“To make up for his lack of manhood, I dare swear. I do not trust such. Louis, do think about what I have said. Consult with your advisers. I am sure they will agree that the way to Jerusalem must be made safe.”