I was glad he hadn't referred to me again as a blood witch. I wanted people to forget about it for now.
"Also," Cal said, "this kind of spell is usually self-limiting. I mean, the potion was for your face, and you put it only on your face, right? You didn't drink it or anything?"
"God, no," Robbie said.
Cal shrugged. "So it's just fixing that general area, including your eyes, it's unusual, but I guess it's not impossible."
"I don't believe this." I moaned, hiding my face. "I'm such an idiot. I can't believe I did this. I am so, so sorry, Robbie."
"What are you sorry about?" Ethan asked. "Now he can be an airline pilot."
Sharon giggled, then stifled it.
"So you don't think it's going to do anything else?" Robbie asked Cal.
"I don't know," Cal said. He grinned. "Have you been feeling especially smart lately? It could be working on your brain."
I moaned again.
Cal nudged me. "I'm only kidding. It's probably over. Stop worrying."
He clapped once. "Well. I think it's time to start talking about spells and limitations!"
I couldn't laugh, though some of the others did.
"This is our first circle without Bree, Raven, and Beth," said Cal.
"I'm going to miss them," said Jenna softly. Her eyes flicked to me, and I wondered if she thought it was my fault that they had left.
Cal nodded. "Yeah. Me too. But maybe without them we'll be more tightly focused. We'll find out."
We sat in a ring on the floor around Cal. "First, let's go over clans," he said. "You know how they all have qualities associated with them. The Brightendales were healers. The Woodbanes—the 'dark clan'—supposedly fought for power at any cost."
"Ooh," Robbie said. He gave me a mock-fearful look. But I just shivered. The very idea of the Woodbanes made me cold. I didn't think it was something to laugh at.
"The Burnhides were known for their magick with crystals and gems," Cal went on. "The Leapvaughns were mischief makers. The Vikroths were warriors. And so on." He looked around the circle. "Well, just as each clan had qualities associated with it so each clan also had certain runes that it tended to use. So—I think it's time we took a look at some runes."
Cal opened his large leather satchel and pulled out a sheaf of what looked like index cards. He held them up, and I saw that each one had a rune drawn on it very large.
"Rune flash cards!" I said, and Cal nodded.
"Basically, yes," he said. "Using runes is a quick way to get in touch with a deep, old source of power. Tonight I just want to show them to you and have you concentrate on each one. Each symbol has many meanings. They're all there for you, if you open yourself up to them."
We all watched, fascinated, as he held up the white cards one by one, reading the runes' names and telling us what they traditionally stood for.
"There are different names for each symbol. The names depend on whether you're working within a Norse tradition, or German, or Gaelic," Cal explained. "Later on, we'll talk about which runes are associated with which clans."
"This is so beautiful," said Sharon. "I love that people have used these for thousands of years."
Ethan turned to her, nodding his agreement. I watched as their eyes met and held.
Who would have known that Sharon Goodfine would find Wicca beautiful? Or that Ethan would dare to like her? Witchcraft was revealing us not only to ourselves but to each other.
"Let's make a circle," said Cal.
CHAPTER 13
Starlight
March 17, 1982
St. Paddy's Day in New York City. Below, the city is celebrating a holiday they imported from my home, but I cannot join in. Angus is out looking for work. I sit here by the window, crying, though the Goddess knows I have no more tears left.
Everything I knew and loved is gone. My village is burned to the ground. My ma and da are dead, though it's still hard for me to believe it. My little cat Dagda. My friends. Belwicket has been wiped out, our cauldrons broken, out brooms burned, out herbs turned to smoke above our heads.
How did this happen? Why didn't I fall victim as so many others did? Why did Angus and I alone survive?
I hate New York, hate everything about it. The noise blunts my ears. I can't smell any living thing. I can't smell the sea or hear it in the background like a lullaby. There are people everywhere, packed in tight, like sardines. The city is filthy; the people are rude and common. I ache foe my home.
There is no magick in this place.
And yet if there is no magick, surly there is no true evil, either?
— M.R.
We purified our circle with salt and then invoked earth, air, water, and fire with a bowl of salt, a stick of incense, a bowl of water, and a candle. Cal showed us the rune symbols for these elements, and we worked to memorize them.
"Let's try to raise some energy and focus it," said Cal. "We'll try to focus it in ourselves, and we'll limit its effects to a good night's sleep and general well-being. And does anyone have any particular problem they'd like help with?" He met my eyes, and I could tell we were both thinking of my parents. But Cal left it up to me to ask for help in front of everyone, and I said nothing.
"Like, help my stepsister quit being such a pain?" Sharon asked. I hadn't known she had a stepsister. I was between Jenna and Sharon, and their hands felt small and smooth in mine.
Cal laughed. "You can't ask to change others. But you could ask to make it easier for you to get along with her."
"My asthma's been acting up since it got colder," Jenna said. I remembered her coughing but hadn't known she had asthma. People like Jenna, Sharon, Bree—they ruled our school. I had never really considered that they might have problems and difficulties. Not until Wicca came into all our lives.
"Okay, Jenna's asthma," agreed Cal. "Anything else?"
None of us said anything.
Cal lowered his head and closed his eyes, and we did the same. The room was filled with our deep, even breathing, and little by little, as the minutes passed. I felt our breathing tune in to each other, becoming aligned so that we inhaled and exhaled together.
Then Cal's voice, rich and slightly rough, said:
"Blessed be the animals, the plants, and alt living things.
Blessed be the earth, the sky, the clouds, the rain.
Blessed be all people,
those within Wicca and those without.
Blessed be the Goddess and the God,
and all the spirits who help us.
Blessed be. We raise our hearts,
our voices, our spirits to the Goddess and the God."
As we began to move deasil, the words rose and fell in a pattern so that it became a song. We half skipped, half danced in our circle, and the chant became a joyous cry that filled the room, filled all the air around us. I was laughing, breathless, feeling happy and weightless and safe in this circle. Ethan was smiling but intent his face flushed and his corkscrew curls bouncing around his head. Sharon's silky black hair was flying, and she looked pretty and carefree. Jenna looked like a blond fairy queen, and Matt was dark and purposeful. Robbie moved with new grace and coordination as we spun foster and faster. The only thing I missed was Bree's face in the circle.
I felt the energy rise. It coiled around us, building and thickening and swirling in our circle. The living-room floor was warm and smooth beneath my socked feet, and I felt like if I let go of Jenna's and Sharon's hands, I would fly off through the ceiling into the sky. As I looked above me, still chanting the words, I saw the white ceiling waver and dissolve to show me the deep indigo night and the white and yellow stars popping out of the sky so brightly. Awestruck, I gazed upward, seeing the infinite possibilities of the universe where before there had been only a ceiling. I wanted to reach out and touch the stars, and without hesitating, I unclasped my hands and stretched my arms overhead.