He hesitated. Then: It's not where I want to leave. I want to see the sky over India, when it happens.
A great terrible fear clutched Belisarius' heart.
What are you talking about?
Again, that crystalline sort of sigh. I've been glad, these past years, that you never figured it out. I was afraid you would, and it would just cause you pain-since you could have done nothing else anyway. But the time is here, now.
Softly, gently: The moment Link was destroyed, the future changed. Not in all ways, and-it's too complicated to explain, and I don't have much time left-the people alive there now won't be destroyed. Time is like a flowing river, and if you shift the banks it will still most likely end at the same delta. But I live here and now, not then and there, and the timeline that created me-the need for me-has vanished. Will vanish, at least, very soon.
"You're dying?" Without realizing he'd done so, Belisarius cried the words aloud. Then, frantically, scrabbled to bring the jewel's pouch from under his tunic.
It's more like I simply become impossible. But I suppose that's all that death is, in the end. That point at which the almost infinitely-complex interactions of natural forces that we call a "life" just becomes too improbable to continue.
"He's dying," Belisarius choked. He had the pouch out, finally, and spilled the jewel onto his palm.
Aide looked…
The same as always. Glittering, coruscating. Beautiful.
Please, Belisarius. I want to see the sky over India.
He took the stairs three steps at a time. Never even thinking about the emperor he left behind, open-mouthed.
Chapter 41
Kausambi
Belisarius knocked down two courtiers in the palace's corridors and rolled another halfway down the steps leading to the main entrance, before he finally reached a place on the square fronting the palace that was sun-drenched. He had no memory of it, afterward. All he remembered was the all-consuming, desperate hope that exposing the jewel to full daylight would somehow change things.
A stupid hope, really, on the part of a man who was anything but stupid. As if light rays and summer heat could alter the nature of space and time.
Sit down, will you? said Aide. You're gasping for breath.
Belisarius was winded. Winded and half-exhausted. Even for a still-young man in very good physical condition, that long race up the stairs from the deep cellars had taken a toll.
He more-or-less collapsed onto one of the wide stone benches that lined the square in front of the palace. Dully, staring at the blue sky above.
Why? he asked, and began to weep. You knew all along, didn't you? Why didn't you tell me?
Actually, I didn't know at the beginning. If you remember, I didn't know very much, then. But I realized within the first year, yes. First, because it was obvious. And then, because I remembered.
Belisarius lowered his head and pinched his eyes. Remembered what?
My last conversation with the Great Ones. Just before they sent me here. Well, "sent" isn't exactly the right word. Neither is "me," for that matter. I wasn't really me, when I left, and I wasn't sent here so much as they made it possible…
He was silent, for a moment. It's really hard to explain, Belisarius. What existed then-in the future-was nothing you would have recognized as "Aide." I emerged here, over time, where I had only been faceted crystals before. What was sent here was not a "me" that had never existed before, but more in the way of the condensed facets. A package of potential, if you will, not a real person.
Apologetically: I know it doesn't make much sense to you. But it's true. The Great Ones told me I would change, and they were right.
His eyes still pinched, Belisarius shook his head. Those bastards. They sent you here to die, is what they did.
Yes, in a way. But it's not that simple. If I didn't die-volunteer for it-my people wouldn't live.
Angrily, Belisarius dropped his hand and slapped his thigh. "Bullshit!" he shouted, aloud. Don't tell me they couldn't have handled those so-called "new gods" on their own-without this.
Yes, but The crystal's flashing image in Belisarius' mind seemed to freeze, for an instant. Then, sounding very relieved, Aide said: They're coming. I hoped they would. I will let them explain.
For the second time in his life, Belisarius felt himself swept away into the heavens, as if blown there by a giant's gust.
As before, he found himself hanging in darkness. Somewhere-somehow-suspended in space. Able to observe the stars and galaxies, but not really part of that universe.
And, as before, he saw a point of light erupt, and come before him in the form of a Great One. Only, this time, it was many points of light and many Great Ones. He seemed to be facing a three-dimensional phalanx of the beings.
Why? he demanded of them, feeling-this time-none of the awe he had felt before. Only anger. Couldn't you have done it some other way?
One of the Great Ones swirled and moved closer. OF COURSE,
GRANDFATHER. BUT AT WHAT COST? THE QUESTION WAS NEVER THAT OF THE FATE
OF THE NEW GODS. ONCE THEY DESTROYED THEIR PLANET, THEY WERE AT OUR
MERCY. WE COULD HAVE ERASED THEM FROM EXISTENCE AT ANY TIME-AS,
INDEED, WE SHALL DO NOW. BUT ONLY AT THE COST OF CONDEMNING AIDE'S
NOT-YET-PEOPLE TO PERPETUAL SLAVERY.
I don't .AIDE JUST TOLD YOU HIMSELF. HE ONLY BECAME AIDE WITH YOU. ONLY
WHEN, FOR THE FIRST TIME, A CRYSTAL ACCEPTED THAT IT WAS SOMETHING
GREATER THAN A SERVANT. A SLAVE-NOT ONLY TO THE NEW GODS, BUT TO US,
WHO CREATED THEM.
A second Great One looped above, now speaking also. TELL US,
BELISARIUS. HOW DO YOU MANUMIT A SLAVE WHO DOES NOT THINK HE IS A
HUMAN? IN FACT, IS NOT-YET-A HUMAN.
The huge, glowing creature completed the loop and began spinning slowly. WE DID NOT SEND AIDE TO YOU SO THAT HE MIGHT DIE. WE SENT HIM
SO THAT HE MIGHT LIVE, AND BE BORN, AND BECOME SOMETHING WITH A NAME
OF HIS OWN. WHICH, WITH YOUR HELP, HE DID. AND NOW, HAVING DONE SO,
MUST NATURALLY DIE. JUST AS YOU WILL DIE. JUST AS WE WILL DIE. JUST AS
ALL HUMANS DIE.
He doesn't have to die this young! Belisarius shrieked.
YES, HE DOES. JUST AS MOST OF YOUR SOLDIERS ALSO DIE YOUNG. JUST
AS YOU-A YOUNG MAN-MIGHT HAVE DIED ANY OF A HUNDRED TIMES DURING THE
WAR. IF YOU WANT AIDE TO BE HUMAN-TRULY HUMAN AND NO LONGER A SLAVE TO
ANYONE-THEN YOU HAVE TO GIVE HIM THAT CHOICE. CHOICE, GRANDFATHER.
WHICH HE MADE, NOT US.
FINALLY. AFTER MILLENNIA WHEN THE CRYSTALS COULD NOT ACCEPT THAT
CHOICE-THE SIMPLE ABILITY TO CHOOSE-WAS THEIRS ALSO. JUST AS IT IS
OURS, AND YOURS, AND THE BIRTHRIGHT OF EVERY MEMBER OF EVERY BRANCH
AND FORM OF HUMANKIND. THIS TIME, THEY WERE BOLD ENOUGH TO TRY. THEY
TRIED, AND THEY TRIUMPHED. WOULD YOU NOW, AT THE END, DENY AIDE AND
HIS PEOPLE THAT GREAT VICTORY?
Belisarius felt as if he were reeling, though he simply hung in space. He tried to come up with an answer, but…
Couldn't.
Aide's voice came then, almost timidly. I am content, Belisarius. Really, I am. I will be the first crystal in history who had a name. And whose name will be remembered.
MORE THAN REMEMBERED! That voice came roaring, just as the point of light from which it emanated also came roaring forward. A moment later, a new Great One hung in space before Belisarius.
This one… was immense. Truly immense. It dwarfed its companions.
Yet, despite its gargantuan size, it seemed somehow frail. As if it were shredded both at the edges and within its core.