“Piruetas for Sayonara?” shot Tana. “Don’t even think about it, he’s a fancy man who plays crooked.”
“Life is short and you have to know how to enjoy it, and we aren’t going to condemn the girl to bitterness by starting her out with a tattered old man,” interjected Machuca.
“On the contrary, she shouldn’t become accustomed to thinking work is idleness and the salary is enjoyable, because later there’s no way to rid her of the habit.”
“Who said such foolishness! If she is going to live off of her body, then let her at least shake it out and enjoy it. Sanctimoniousness will only bring you communion wafers!”
“Death is always crouching somewhere and the trick is to discover where before it lashes out at you.” Todos los Santos uttered those somber words and the other women didn’t understand what they had to do with anything. “I’ll say just one thing: In this barrio death dances around, so very slyly, in Piruetas’s shoes.”
An uncomfortable silence descended and the women pressed against one another, seeking the antidote to that shivering thought.
“I am not one to prohibit the girl from dealing with Piruetas,” continued Todos los Santos. “You all know that for years he has been in and out of my bed as he chose. He casts his net over all of us and sooner or later she too will have to feel the brush of his effeminate fingernails, sparkling with polish. But it’s preferable that it be later rather than sooner.”
The dawn fell thick with humidity and shrouded in the screaming of seagulls over the gentleness of the river, and the girls went each one to her own home, grateful along the way for the existence of affable men like Manrique, who soften the ominous fascination that they all, without exception, felt toward cruel men like Piruetas.
When he learned that the girl’s hour had arrived, and that the chosen novio for her first time was old Manrique, Sacramento’s spirit crashed to the ground and shattered into a thousand pieces.
“So even then you loved her?” I ask.
“Loved her, no. Love, what people call love, not sleeping at night or eating during the day thinking about a woman, señorita Claire inspired something like that in me, always solitary even when she was accompanied, with that mystery of hers, made of dark circles under her eyes and pale skin under her dress. Or señora Machuca, with her thirty years of life so well lived that there was nothing beautiful or ugly in this world left for her to discover. Or even Olguita, so compassionate, her legs useless, like a mermaid, who half frightened me and half fascinated me with those steel orthopedics pressing against her flesh. I loved and desired all of them until I was crazy and even beyond. But the girl? No one falls in love with a wild-haired, slippery, surly tadpole. At that time she was to me something worse and much stronger than love. She was the pain of my conscience.”
Since he knew about señor Manrique, Sacramento was attacked by a frenzy of labor that was incomprehensible to the neighbors who always caught him taking a siesta in the shade of some tree and who now saw him slaving away under the broiling sun like a mad ant, thumping his cart along the streets of the pueblo from dawn well into night to carry cans of gasoline from the docks to the sawmill and lumber from the sawmill to the docks, to carry recently arrived travelers from the train station to the Hotel Pipatón and travelers about to depart, from the Hotel Pipatón to the train station, to haul cement or bricks to construction sites, cans of water to the higher barrios, sacks of rice and grain from the river to the cooperative and from the cooperative to the Troco’s kitchens. They even saw him dragging up to the peak of Cristo del Pronto Alivio sick people who were going there to beg for their health and the recently healed who were going to give thanks for the miracle of their healing. At the end of a week of maximum output he presented himself in Todos los Santos’s house with his pockets filled with coins, which he dumped on the table in the kitchen.
“I have come to pay for the girl’s thing.”
“What thing?”
“Her first night of love.”
Olguita, Tana, Machuca, Delia Ramos, all of them had gathered to prepare tamales for the leper colony bazaar, with corn masa and pork wrapped tightly in banana leaves, then tied with string, and they all stiffened with their hands in the masa when they saw the boy’s expression of pathetic solemnity as he delivered his capital; the wind of life or death ruffling his hair; the lyric tenor’s ardor with which he had burst onto the scene of tamale preparation, trying to prevent the inevitable by presenting his petition; his delicate supplication that broke into stammering when the chuckling started and he saw the women doubled up with laughter over the yellow corn flour, and their laughter slid like liquid fire through his ears, ulcerating his body inside, burning even more because of the presence of his idolized Claire, who wasn’t making tamales with the others, of course, but was sitting there in the background painting her fingernails killer red, and who, like the others, threw the boiling flood of her laughter in his face.
“Come here, my precious child,” said Machuca, still shaking from the hilarity of it, crushing his face against her soft breasts. “This boy is worth his weight in gold.”
“Such beautiful curly eyebrows!” said Olguita, kissing his eyes. “When he grows up he’s going to be a considerate man, God bless him.”
Once again able to be serious, Todos los Santos gathered up the coins on the table, put them in a paper bag, took some more coins from her savings drawer, and put them in the bag too.
“Take this,” she said to Sacramento, giving him the bag. “Take the girl to the movies. Buy some chocolates and cotton candy, you’ll have more than enough there.”
The two kids went to the movies together and saw a few westerns in which a riled-up John Wayne didn’t leave an Indian standing. But when they got back to Todos los Santos’s house, Sacramento said he didn’t want to go inside and stubbornly insisted on saying good-bye at the door.
“I’m leaving Tora, girl,” he announced. “I am going to sign up as a petrolero to come back bronzed by the sun, shaggy and with a lot of money, so the mujeres of La Catunga won’t ever laugh at me again.”
“Okay,” she said, “we were going far away; I was going to be a petrolero too and we were going through the jungle with our horses and… ”
“No more silly games; this time it’s for real. Adiós.”
The girl just stood there against the falling sunset, devoid of sorrow or glory, featuring an invisible sun with insipid tones of gray and brown, and watched Sacramento’s tiny figure as it moved away into the distance, along the edge of the Tropical Oil Company’s fence, toward the point at which the underbrush swallowed the path, where the pueblo ended and the Carare-Opón jungle began.
“Adiós, hermano mío. I hope you come back rich and powerful!” she shouted, waving her hand, and it was the first of many times that he would hear her say good-bye without a trace of sadness in her voice.
five
The girl became an adult on that afternoon of insipid twilight when Sacramento departed. In accordance with the new name she had been given, she was no longer called Girl, rather Sayonara. She was never again seen engaged in childish brawls in the barrio, and if from time to time she opened the treasure chest, it was to adorn herself with jewelry and gaze at herself in the mirror.
“The mirror, always looking at yourself in the mirror,” Todos los Santos reproached her, seeing her absorbed and distant as if it were she who had left Tora. “You should know that the mirror is not an object of confidence because it is inhabited by Vanity and Deceit, two evil creatures that swallow everything they reflect. He who looks a lot in the mirror will end up spending a lot of time alone.”