‘So who do you think killed the Colonel?’ I said.
Penny stopped pacing and threw herself into the nearest heavily-padded chair. It didn’t budge an inch under the impact. Penny crossed her legs and waggled the top one fiercely. ‘There are so many secrets in this house, in this family; I really don’t know where to start, darling.’
‘Try,’ I said.
‘James was definitely Diana’s son,’ said Penny. ‘But I’m not at all sure Daddy was his father. I’ve heard a great many rumours, from people in a position to know, that Daddy married Diana when she was already pregnant with another man’s child.’
‘I didn’t know that,’ I said. ‘Though the Colonel could be a real bastard, when the need arose …’
‘Ishmael!’ said Penny, putting a shocked hand to her mouth. ‘What a thing to say! Here I am trying to spare your feelings by being discreet …’
‘Sorry,’ I said. ‘We all grieve in our own ways.’
‘Yes, well …’ said Penny. But she was too full of things she needed to say to stay shocked for long. ‘Then there’s the letter James left for you. I mean: A horror has come to Belcourt! What do you think he meant by that?’
‘Too many possibilities,’ I said.
‘Then there’s Alex Khan, of course. Running after Mummy like a dog in heat.’ Penny shuddered delicately. ‘They think they’re being so discreet … But if Alex really thinks he can get to Daddy through Mummy, he’s in for a rude awakening. Mummy’s always been a lot smarter than most people realize. She’d never do anything to endanger her meal ticket. You don’t think Daddy just “happened” to bump into her at that grubby little sales conference, did you? She put a lot of hard planning into getting that job and choosing just the right outfit to attract some rich old fool. When she set her cap at Daddy, he didn’t stand a chance.’
‘And you know all this because …?’ I said.
Penny grinned. ‘People really shouldn’t keep diaries. And certainly not ones with such fragile locks. I know all I need to know about Mummy dearest.’
She paused for the first time, to look around my room. ‘I don’t think I’ve been in here for years. There aren’t usually enough people at these little gatherings to fill all the guest rooms. You must never forget, Ishmael; Mummy wants all of this, more than anything. The house, and everything that goes with it. I think it’s possible she would kill to keep it. If she thought Daddy was going to sell it, after all … If she thought Alex was trying to take control of everything away from Daddy … and if poor James got caught in the middle … I think it’s entirely possible Mummy could commit murder. To protect her interests.’
‘You’re being very hard on your parents,’ I said.
‘They should have been better parents,’ said Penny. ‘You might have noticed, my family isn’t a real family. As such.’
‘I wouldn’t know,’ I said.
Penny sat forward in her chair, immediately contrite. ‘Oh, of course! You said you were an orphan.’
‘Something like that,’ I said.
Penny frowned. ‘Sometimes I think … Daddy never let himself get close to me, for fear I’d go away and leave him, like James. You’ve no idea how much that hurt Daddy. He couldn’t bear to go through it again.’
‘The Colonel had his reasons for staying away,’ I said. ‘You saw what he said in his letter.’
Penny waited, until it became clear I wasn’t going to say any more, and then she just sniffed, loudly. ‘You’re much better off without a family, darling. They do so complicate things. Mummy, for example, was never really interested in children. She only had me to make sure of hanging on to Daddy. I don’t think I want to talk about my parents any more.’
‘All right,’ I said. ‘What do you want to talk about?’
‘Well, there’s Alex, obviously. The man who sold his soul, for a company that was never his and almost certainly never will be. Who knows to what lengths desperation could drive such a man? But, my best bet would have to be Sylvia.’
‘Really?’ I said. ‘Why?’
‘Oh, come on, darling; do try and keep up. She’s the only one here we don’t know anything about! She’s from outside the family and nothing to do with Daddy’s business. Who is Sylvia, really? Just another sweet-smiling gold-digger, with Diana as her latest meal ticket? Or … did she deliberately ingratiate herself with Diana, in order to get herself invited here? Could she, in fact, be responsible for the death threats? Perhaps she was married to someone Daddy fired, who then committed suicide, so Sylvia swore to make Daddy pay, and-’
‘You’re reaching, now,’ I said.
‘I know!’ said Penny. ‘Isn’t it fun?’
We both looked round sharply, at a sudden knock on my door.
Penny was up and out of her chair in a moment. ‘I don’t want anyone to know I was here!’ she hissed.
‘Hide in the cupboard,’ I said.
‘What?’ Penny looked at the massive oak cupboard on the other side of the room. ‘In there? Are you serious?’
‘It always works in bedroom farces,’ I said reasonably. ‘Would you expect someone to be hiding in someone else’s cupboard?’
‘Well, no, but …’
‘I was always a big fan of the Brian Rix farces,’ I said. ‘He understood the importance of a cupboard. Go on; get in there!’
Penny hurried over to the cupboard and opened one of the doors. There was more than enough space for Penny to hide in. She stepped carefully inside, shot me a quick glare, and then pulled the door almost but not completely shut.
‘Come in!’ I said brightly.
The door opened, and Roger slouched in. He pushed the door shut behind him, peered around, and then glowered at me.
‘You took your time, leaving me standing around out there. Don’t want the others to get the idea I’m sneaking around behind their backs.’
‘Even though you are,’ I said.
He scowled miserably, looked down at his shoes, and then straightened up to face me squarely. ‘Have you heard someone moving about, in the corridor? Just … walking up and down?’
‘Yes,’ I said. ‘But when I looked, there was nobody there.’
‘I knew I heard someone!’ said Roger. ‘Far too much sneaking around going on in this house. Look, I need to talk to you. Man to man. Can’t talk to the others. This family of Penny’s has secrets like a dog has fleas. Can’t start a conversation without tripping over something you’re not supposed to talk about. They think they’re so good at hiding things … They should have grown up with my family.’
‘What were they like?’ I said.
‘Evolution in action,’ said Roger. ‘Survival of the fittest, and trample the weakest underfoot. Everyone out for themselves and scrambling all over each other to get ahead. I figured out early on that I couldn’t compete. Wasn’t hard enough, or self-centred enough. So I just retreated into the background and did my best not to be noticed. And now every single one of them, every brother and sister and aunt and uncle and cousin, hates my guts. Because I’m the one who inherited everything!’
He grinned broadly. ‘Oh, that put the cat among the pigeons! Mum and Dad died in a car crash, and the will left everything to me. Not even a bequest to anyone else, despite all those years they’d spent trying to crawl up Mum and Dad’s arses. I think the will was my parents’ last act of revenge, on a family they couldn’t stand …’ He stopped and looked at me. ‘You know; you’re remarkably easy to talk to.’
‘I get that a lot,’ I said.
‘Anyway! That isn’t what I’m here to talk about. I want to talk about the murder!’
‘All right,’ I said. ‘Who do you think killed the Colonel?’
‘Spoilt for choice, old man!’ said Roger. ‘James was the only one in this family that Walter really cared about. Harsh though that is. And, James was the only one here who couldn’t be bought or pressured or used, to get at Walter. So of course he had to go. He should never have come back. All he did was put himself in the line of fire.’ Roger smiled broadly again. ‘See? I’m a lot smarter than most people think. I notice things. I learned to fade into the background, so the rest of my family wouldn’t notice me, but that’s the best way to see what’s really going on. Walter is the key to all this. Alex wants Walter’s company and his wife. Diana wants Walter, so she can have her old life back. Don’t ask me about Sylvia, though … Haven’t a clue what she really wants. Far too cheerful and charming and everybody’s friend for my liking. It’s not natural. People like that are always after something. When I look at her, I see a professional at work. But what kind of professional …’