There was a small cupboard in one corner of the room. It was about waist high and had a flat top which could be used as a shelf. She took out a bottle of wine and poured out a glass for me which she brought to the table.
“You’ll find it good. It was a good year. We had plenty of sun. A vintage year. You’ll enjoy it.”
She looked at the bottle.
“Oh, I’ve given you the last. Never mind.
There’s another in the cupboard. She opened another bottle, poured out a glass for herself and returned to the table.
She lifted hers to me.
“The very best of good fortune, Mademoiselle. I hope your stay at the chateau will be a happy one.”
“Thank you,” I replied, ‘and the best of good fortune to you. “
“My,” she said, “I feel honoured, I do, having a famous artist sitting at my table.”
“I can’t tell you how grateful I am to you. I should have hated to sit in the carriage waiting for someone to come and rescue me.”
“Good fortune for us both,” she said. She tilted her glass and drank deeply. I did the same.
“Let me fill your glass.”
“Thank you,” I said.
She took it to the cupboard and refilled it.
“Your chateau is delicious,” I told her.
“It’s a family secret.”
“I wasn’t going to ask you to divulge it.”
“You speak good French Mademoiselle. That’s a mercy or this would be a bit of a dumb show.”
I laughed. I was beginning to feel a little sleepy. It was the warmth of the fire . the food . the wine, I supposed. My eyelids seemed as though they would press down. It was getting harder to stay awake.
“Feeling a bit drowsy are you?” I heard her voice, which seemed to come from some distance. I saw her face near my own. She was peering at me, smiling.
“It’s the wine,” she was saying.
“Makes you sleepy. I reckon you was tired after that journey. Never mind … a little nap never harmed anybody.”
It was unnatural. I had not been tired when I arrived and it was not very late. I felt I was being rather impolite after she had taken such pains to entertain me.
Something was happening. There were voices . I struggled with the overpowering drowsiness. Somewhere at the back of my mind I thought:
It’s Jacques, back with the carriage. He hasn’t been long . or am I dreaming?
Sleeping . sleeping . the room was fading away. Someone was close, looking at me. Someone had taken my hands. I felt myself lifted up. Then I was completely lost in darkness.
I awoke suddenly. I did not know where I was. I was in a strange room.
I was lying. naked . on a bed and my hair was loose.
I tried to lift myself, but my head was swimming and I felt dizzy. I was dreaming and this was some sort of nightmare. Where was I? I could not remember what could have brought me here.
I tried again. Something stirred beside me . someone.
I gave a little scream. My eyes had grown accustomed now to the darkness. I saw a window with bars across and my eyes could make out the outline of pieces of furniture.
I fought off the dizziness and sat up.
Immediately hands were pulling me down, strong hands. A voice said:
“Kate, my beautiful Kate …” It was a voice I knew. A voice I had often thought of. It convinced me that I was in some sort of nightmare.
I caught my breath and as I did so he pulled me down; he forced himself down on me. I cried out in disbelieving horror. This could not be happening to me. It was indeed a nightmare. I must wake up quickly.
But I did not wake up. I heard his triumphant laugh, and it was in truth the Baron who was misusing me . and something told me that he had always intended to do this and that at the back of my mind I had known it. feared it . dreaded it . and the shame of it half wanted it. I tried to shout out, but his mouth was over mine pressing down on me. I was aware of the strength of him and was powerless. I tried to struggle but my limbs were leaden. There was nothing I could do to resist him.
It was a shattering experience. I felt as though I were floating above the Earth into a world which was quite unknown to me. Strange, hitherto undreamed of sensations took possession of me. I was not resisting any more. I felt myself to be part of him . and I was fighting against a sense of exhilaration which threatened to overwhelm me.
It was over almost as soon as it had begun. He drew away from me, but his lips were still on my face and he was kissing me almost tenderly.
“Dear Kate,” he murmured.
I was struggling back to reality. I put out my hands and felt his body. I was trying to collect my thoughts as they eluded me. The heavy drowsiness was still with me and I felt a great urge to close my eyes and lie there trying to recapture that strange sensation which I had just experienced.
His arms were about me. They felt like iron bands. I heard his voice whispering words which seemed strange coming from him.
“Kate … sweet Kate … Oh Kate, how happy you have made me.”
I heard myself say: “This is a nightmare.”
“It’s a heavenly dream,” he corrected me.
“Dreams … dreams …”
“Kate.” His mouth was close to my ear. He nibbled it gently.
“Don’t try to think now. You can’t. You’re still in a state of blissful pleasure. Don’t try to wake yourself out of it … yet.”
Now was the time for me to wake up, to find myself in bed at the castle, perhaps, since that had been where I was remembering I had been going. No doubt I had arrived late and so tired that I had slept heavily . and being in the castle had had this strange dream.
But the bars at the windows . They suggested a prison. A prison!
I felt consciousness coming back. This was not a dream. I was still here. I was lying in a bed with the Baron . and we were . lovers. Lovers! What a travesty of the word!
I tried to sit up, but he held me down. I could not but be aware of how strong he was and how puny I was in comparison.
“This can’t be true,” I said.
His voice was low and triumphant.
“But it is. Too late for regrets now, Kate. It has happened. You and I… as I knew as soon as I set eyes on you it must be … and it was going to be.”
I continued to struggle.
“Be still, Kate,” he said.
“You’re bewildered. You are just realizing what has happened. Last night you became my beloved mistress.”
“This is… madness.”
“The effect of the wine is still with you. It will last some time yet.
It had to be, Kate. It was the only way. Now if I had appeared suddenly and said “I want you, Kate. My desire for you is so overwhelming that it must be satisfied” what would you have said?
You would have laughed me to scorn even though somewhere at the back of your mind was the thought: How I should like to give myself up to the pleasure he can provide. He is the only one. I want to be taken by him as his ancestors took women when they raided the coast. “
My mind was clearing with every passing moment. I murmured: “I was with that woman …”
“My good servant.”
“The carriage had broken down …”
“It was all arranged, darling. I’m sorry it had to be like that. If you had come willingly … but you never would. Your stern upbringing would have suppressed your natural instincts and you would have convinced yourself that they did not exist.”
“I can’t …”
“Don’t try. Lie still. Oh Kate, it was wonderful. You are magnificent.
You’re a woman as well as an artist. I admire you so much, Kate. “
Through my befugged sensations came the appalling realization of what had happened. He had planned it and I had been the victim of. rape.
I, Kate Collison, had been raped by the man I most detested . this arrogant Baron who thought he had only to beckon to a woman to make her come running. He followed the customs of his marauding ancestors who had lived by rape and pillage. And I. had been his victim. I could not believe it. even now. “