Выбрать главу

When I saw him I stood very still, trembling with a terrible fear. My impulse was to snatch up Kendal and run as fast as I could.

He was coming towards me. He bowed. Memories came flooding back. I wanted to shout at him: “Go away. Get out of my life.”

But he stood there smiling.

“Mamma,” said Kendal and continued in his delightful combination of the two languages:’ Voila the monsieur of the jar dins

“Kendal and I have become friends,” said the Baron.

“How … how long has this been going on?” I murmured.

“Long enough for us to have become good friends.”

I could not look at him. He terrified me. I knew his ruthlessness and I greatly feared what his next action would be.

“How did you … ?”

“I saw him. I was attracted by him … I discovered his name.”

Kendal was looking from one to the other of us.

“Are we going to fly the kite?” he asked.

“But of course,” replied the Baron.

“Is it not a fine kite?” he went on, looking at me.

“It’s bigger than the one that went to England,” said Kendal.

“I hope your grandfather liked it.”

He knows so much! I thought. He has done this deliberately. Why?

He bowed to me.

“Will you forgive us? We must get the kite in the sky.

It has to show these others how inferior their little efforts are. “

“Come on,” said Kendal.

I watched them move off together. I was dazed. What is he trying to do now? I asked myself. What does this mean? He has been coming to the Gardens to see the boy. Oh, why? When has he ever been interested in children?

So I had not escaped from him. The last few years when I had come to terms with life, when I had learned to accept what it offered me and be grateful for it. they were just the interim.

I was afraid of this man. I knew him to be without mercy.

What did he want with my son?

The appalling truth had to be faced. Kendal was his son too.

I watched the oriflamme rise in the sky. There it was, outshining all others. Everyone was pointing it out and Kendal’s pride in it was immense.

What is he teaching the boy already? I asked myself. Already he is showing him that he must be superior to all others. He must fly a larger kite. He must put the others in the shade.

It was how the Baron had been brought up. He would try to turn my beautiful child into another such as himself.

I heard him say: “Here you are. You hold it. Grip it firmly. Don’t let go. Can you?”

“Of course,” said Kendal.

“Of course,” he repeated.

“I am now going to have a word with your Mamma.”

He sat beside me. Instinctively I moved away. He noticed and laughed.

“What a boy!” he said.

I did not answer.

“He looks just like my grandfather. I have a portrait of him at the boy’s age. The likeness is amazing.”

I said slowly: “This boy is my boy. He is never going to be like those Norse barons who rode roughshod over everyone who stood in their way.”

“There is a sweetness in him,” he went on, ‘inherited from his maternal relations, I don’t doubt. But he’ll be a fighter. “

“I don’t think there is any need to discuss him with you. If you will let me know the cost of the kite …”

“That was my gift to him.”

“I don’t really care for him to take gifts from strangers.”

“Not from his own father!”

I turned to him sharply.

“What are you planning?”

“I merely made a comment. I am his father and I shall give him a kite if I want to… or anything else for that matter.”

“I am his mother. I have brought him into this world and cared for him ever since. It is not for you to come along now because you like the look of him and claim to be his father. How can you be sure that you are.”

He looked at me sardonically.

“You are a woman of impeccable morals, I am sure. Everything fits. One only has to look at him.”

“Lots of children look alike.”

“Not so like. Besides, I knew him at once as soon as I saw him. I said to myself: That is my son.”

“You have no claim on him.”

“Don’t let him see that you are afraid of me. That might arouse his resentment against me. I have heard from him what a beautiful, clever mother he has. I have also heard talk of you. You justified my belief in you. The famous Kate Collison … beautiful … young … aloof … a little mysterious … living almost like a nun, they say.”

“Where did you get this information?”

“You live in the limelight, dear Kate. One cannot help but bear these things. I said to myself: There has been no one else in Kate’s life. I was the one. I remain the one.”

“I see your opinion of yourself has not changed.”

“As a matter of fact, I’ll tell you this, Kate. I am not a very happy man.”

“How is that? Surely you can juggle with circumstances and give yourself what you want?”

“It’s not easy.”

“You have indeed changed. I thought you were omnipotent.”

“Not quite, alas.”

“Surely you are not content with being ” not quite”?”

“Listen, Kate, don’t let’s waste time like this. I have thought of you often.”

“I suppose that is meant to be flattering.”

“It’s the truth. That was a wonderful time for me.”

“It was hardly that for me.”

“It was, Kate. If you are truthful with yourself you will admit you loved it … every minute. Come, you know you did.”

“I hated it. I hated you. It ruined …”

“Your life? No. Look for yourself. Out of it came that beautiful boy.

You wouldn’t change that, would you? “

“I have my boy and I am going to keep him.”

“You wouldn’t have him any different, would you … not in one little way?”

“Of course I wouldn’t.”

“There you are. He had to be part mine to make him as he is. You might have married Bertrand. I saved you from that. | I was surprised when he didn’t go ahead. I told him to, but | he defied me. He lost a great deal. He is a very poor man now. a He married hoping his wife would bring him something. She did a little … not as much as he hoped though.”

“Did you have a hand in that?”

“He had to learn he could not defy me. Oh, you would have been so bored with him. Such a milk and water gentleman. It would have lasted with you, Kate. It would have ruined your career. Madame de Mortemer.

No, I don’t see you as that. Instead here you are, glorious Kate Collison, sought after but unattainable, the great artist, and the mother of the most delightful boy in France. Tell me, does he paint? ”

“What is it to you?”

“A great deal.”

“I refuse to answer.”

“Oh Kate … the same Kate. It take me back so. I should never have let you go. You see I can make mistakes.”

“That’s an extraordinary admission. Yes, you have indeed changed. It surprises me very much to hear you admit defeat.”

“I hope you will take pity on me.”

“I don’t believe a word you say, you know. I never shall.”

“Oh, you admit we shall have other opportunities for disagreeing. That implies a continuation of our relationship which I very much desire.”

“I think I should be going.”

“You can’t bring down the oriflamme yet … unless you would like me to take charge of the boy.”

“That I will never allow.”

“I thought not,” he said.

“Why have you come here?” I asked.

“To see the boy.”

“To ingratiate yourself with him.”

“I want his friendship.”