Would that have happened while your mother was in charge? “
“Your daughter’s elopement has nothing to do with the school.”
“My daughter spent many hours with you at your school. There she gossiped and told her love secrets, I do not doubt. Then she elopes with the groom. It is a disaster for her … for us … for you and the school. Particularly when I hear some gossip that the son had to depart on the Grand Tour somewhat hastily on your account.”
“You are … offensive.”
“I know. To tell you the truth it’s part of my charm. I cultivate it.
It is so much more attractive than geniality. Particularly when I am speaking the truth, and that is, my dear Mademoiselle, that you are in an uneasy situation . and so am I. Let us be friends. Let us help each other. What will you do when the school no longer provides you with a living? You will become a governess, I’ll swear, to some hateful children who will make your life a misery. But you might marry.
You could become a farmer’s wife, perhaps . and let me tell you this, that would be the greatest tragedy of all. “
“You seem to know a great deal about my private affairs.”
I make a point of learning what interests me. “
“But I cannot do what you suggest.”
“For such an intelligent young woman you say some foolish things sometimes. But then I know you do not mean them so it does not alter my opinion of you. I am interested in you, Mademoiselle. Are you not in charge of my daughter and going to take an even closer interest in her? I want you to leave as soon as possible but I understand that you will have matters to clear up. I am a reasonable man. I would not wish to hurry you too much and fortunately we have a little time.”
“You go too fast.”
“I always go fast. It is the best way to travel. But you will find it not too fast. Just the right speed. Well, the matter is settled then and we can get down to details.”
The matter is far from settled. Suppose I agreed . suppose I stayed with Margot until the child is born, what then? “
“There would be a position for you in my household.”
“Position? What position?”
That we can decide on. You will be Marguerite’s cousin during your stay in the house where I shall send you. Perhaps you could continue to be that. I have always found that when practising deception it is well to be consistent. One should keep as near to the truth as possible and keep the fiction plausible throughout. Fact and fiction must be skilfully woven to give an impression of complete truth, and once having established yourself as a cousin, it may be that it would be well for you to continue in that role. Your nationality provides difficulties. We must have it that the daughter of a great-great-great-grandfather married into England and you are from a branch of that family tree, which makes you a cousin, though a remote one. You will be Marguerite’s companion and look after her. She will need looking after. This episode has proved that. Is that not a good proposition? It gets you out of your difficulties and me out of mine.
”It seems quite outrageous. “
The best things in life can be just that. I will start making arrangements without delay. “
“I have not yet agreed to come.”
“But you will, for you are a woman of sound good sense. You make your mistakes like most of us but you will not repeat them. I know that and I want you to endow Marguerite with some of your good sense. She is a wayward child, I fear.” He stood up and came to my chair. I also stood and faced turn. He laid his hands on my shoulders and I was vividly reminded of that other occasion in his bedroom. I think he was too, for he sensed my shrinking and it amused him.
“It is always a mistake to be afraid of life,” he said, “Who said that I was afraid?”
“I can read your thoughts.”
Then you are very clever. “
“You will discover how clever … in time, perhaps. Now I am going to be kind as well as clever. This has come as a shock to you. You had no idea of the proposition I was going to put to you and I can see the thoughts turning over and over in your mind. My dear Mademoiselle, face the facts. The school is in decline; this affair of my daughter has shocked members of the gentry.
You may say it was none of your affair but Marguerite was at your school and you have had the misfortune to attract the heir of Derringham. You cannot help being charming, but these people are not as far-seeing as I am. They will say you set out to catch him and the Derringhams found out in time and sent him off. Unfair, you say. You had no intention of trapping this young man. But it is not always what is true that counts. I give your school another six months . perhaps eight . and then what? Come, be sensible. Be Marguerite’s cousin. I will see that you need not be worried with finances again.
Get away from the schoolhouse of sad memories. I know of the love between you and your mother. What can you do here but brood? Get away from slander, from gossip. Mademoiselle, this unfortunate state of affairs can bring a new life to you. “
So much of what he was saying was true. I heard myself murmur: “I cannot decide immediately.”
He gave a little sigh of relief.
“No, no. It asks too much. You shall have today and to, morrow to decide. You will think about this and the plight of my daughter. She is fond of you. When I told her what I proposed she became happy. She loves you. Mademoiselle. Think of her distress. And think of your future too.”
He took my hand and kissed it. I was ashamed of the emotion it aroused in me and I hated myself for being so impressed by such a philanderer, which I was sure he was.
Then he bowed and left me.
Thoughtfully I returned to the schoolhouse.
I sat up late that night going through the books. In any case I knew I could not sleep. The effect that man had on me astonished me. He repelled me and yet attracted me. I could not! get him out of my mind.
To be in his house . to have a position there . a sort of cousin!
I should be a ‘poor relation’, a sort of companion to Margot. Well, what was I going to do otherwise? I did not have to be told that the school was in decline. People were going to blame me for Margot’s indiscretion andl was it true that they were hinting that I had tried to trap Joel Derringham into marriage? The dressmaker would know of the dresses my mother had had made; she had probably been shown the dress lengths in the cupboard. I had a new horse that I might ride with Joel. Oh, I could guess what these people were saying.
Desperately I longed for the calm guidance I could have had from my mother, and suddenly I knew that I could never be happy in this schoolhouse without her. There were too many memories. Everywhere I turned I could picture her so clearly.
I wanted to get away. Yes, the Comte was right, I would face the truth. The thought of going to France, of standing by Margot until her child was born, and then going to live in the Comte’s household excited me, drew me away from my sense of loss and grief more surely than I had thought anything could do.
No wonder I could not sleep.
All through the day I was absent-minded as I taught my classes. It had been so much easier when the pupils were divided between my mother and myself. She had taken the older ones and I could cope easily with the younger. Before I had taken on the role of teacher she had managed quite well, but even she had said what a boon it was to have two of us. She had been a born teacher. I was something less than that.
All through the day I thought of the opportunity which was being offered to me, and it began to seem like an adventure which could restore my interest in life.
When school was over Margot called. She threw herself into my arms and hugged me.