“I’ll be all right,” he assured me. “I’ll just pretend I’m a college kid pulling an all-nighter.”
I laughed weakly. Obviously, I had no defenses strong enough to defeat Brian. God, I loved him. Why didn’t that make everything easy between us?
“Thank you,” I said, though the words were inadequate to express what I felt.
Figuring I’d turn into a gibbering idiot if I stayed awake any longer, I gave Brian a quick, appreciative kiss, then led him to my bedroom.
CHAPTER 13
You know that feeling you get when you’re too tired to sleep? Well add the jitters of a couple gallons of coffee on top of that, and you’ll know exactly how I felt as I lay there in my bed trying to force myself to knock off.
Brian sat on the easy chair in the corner, reading by the light of a bulb so dim that it would give him eyestrain. I had my back turned to him—and to the light—but though I tried to pretend he wasn’t there, my every nerve seemed aware of him. I wanted him beside me in the bed, not across the room from me. I wanted his warmth and strength pressed up against me, his arms wrapped around me. I was too tired to want sex, but oh how I longed for that simple companionship.
If Brian was feeling any of the same feelings, he wasn’t showing it. I could tell by the steady turning of the pages that he actually was reading that book, not just staring at it blankly. I sucked in a deep, quiet breath and let it out slowly, trying to let my body relax.
Easier said than done. Even if I felt sure that Brian wouldn’t side with Lugh, even if I felt sure he’d recognize Lugh if he took over, I still figured I was in for some unpleasantness when I finally gave in to sleep. Lugh would no doubt tell me his opinion of my stubbornness, and he would try to lay a guilt trip on me. I was confident in my ability to resist his persuasion, but I wasn’t looking forward to the battle.
The bed dipped beside me, and I jumped. I hadn’t been even close to sleep, but I had been spaced out enough that I hadn’t heard Brian get up. His hand landed on my shoulder and gave a firm squeeze.
“Having trouble sleeping?” he asked.
Damn. I thought I’d been faking sleep better than that. I rolled onto my back and squinted up at him. He was silhouetted by the single light in the room, and I couldn’t see the expression on his face.
“I’ve had a lot of caffeine today,” I murmured in response. “The exhaustion will take over eventually.”
“Hmm,” he said, but it didn’t sound like an agreement. Without another word, he stood up and crossed the room, turning off the light and leaving the room cloaked in darkness.
I propped myself up on my elbows. “How are you going to stay awake in the dark all night?” I think there was a tinge of hysteria in my voice, but Brian just chuckled.
“I’ll turn it back on once you’re sound asleep,” he said.
Once again, the bed dipped under his weight. I was going to say something else pithy—though I don’t know what—but my words died in my throat when Brian pulled the covers slowly down my body.
When I’m by myself, I generally wear super-comfy PJs to bed, but when Brian’s around it’s either a slinky nightgown or nothing. Tonight, I’d gone with nothing. I’d been sure Brian wouldn’t make sexual overtures when I was so desperately in need of sleep. Shows how much I know.
“Brian. .”
He chuckled again. “I know. Not tonight, you have a headache.”
I couldn’t help a little bark of laughter in response. “Something like that.”
His fingers came to rest at the base of my throat, then traced softly, slowly down my middle. I tried to protest, but my body had a will of its own, arching into the caress even though he didn’t touch any of my erogenous zones.
With a resigned sigh, I reached for him, but he gently nudged my hands away.
“No, no,” he said. “Tonight, I’m taking care of you. You don’t have to do a thing.”
I snorted. “You’ve got to be kidding me.”
Those maddening fingers of his brushed over my nipple, and my breath hitched. “Nope,” he said, sounding cheerful. “I’m just going to give you a little stress relief to help you sleep.”
I squirmed under his touch. Although my body couldn’t help reacting to him, I really, truly wasn’t in the mood. Let me tell you, I have to be very off my game not to be in the mood when Brian is around. But before I could muster another protest, he had leaned over me and planted his lips on mine.
I resisted the pleasure of his kiss for, oh, ten seconds or so. But the brush of his tongue was so incendiary that it felt like every nerve in my body spontaneously combusted. To hell with being too tired for sex! I wrapped my arms around his neck and clung, a greedy, whimpering sound rising from my throat.
Once again, Brian pushed my hands out of the way, this time circling my wrists with his fingers and pinning them to the bed beside my head. He raised his head just enough to give him room to speak, even as I strained toward him. My eyes had adjusted to the dark, and I could see the mingled heat and determination in his eyes.
“I mean it, Morgan,” he said, then punctuated the statement with a delicate lick across the seam of my lips. “Tonight, it’s going to be all about you. So keep your hands to yourself and let me take care of you.”
My heart beat irregularly in my chest. I am not a passive lover, and the idea of lying here like some frigid Victorian lady while Brian had his way with me did not sit well. What the hell had gotten into him?
But, of course, I knew all too well.
“This is one of those goddamn dominance things, isn’t it?” I asked, trying to sound as irritated as I thought I ought to feel.
He nipped at my lower lip, then soothed the sting with his tongue. “It has nothing to do with that,” he assured me. “All I want is to give you some pleasure. I want to give, not take. No ulterior motives, no hidden agendas.”
I’d have argued with him, but he plunged his tongue into my mouth, and the only sound I could make was a moan.
The part of me that never stops thinking knew that whatever he might say, there was more to this than the simple giving of pleasure. If he hadn’t had his little chat with Lugh, it never would have occurred to him to do this. But my body told me in no uncertain terms that thinking was highly overrated. With my defenses weakened by sleep deprivation, I gave in to my body’s demands and stopped struggling to free my wrists.
As soon as I surrendered, Brian let go of my wrists, using one hand to draw maddening circles on the slope of my breast while his tongue tangled with mine. Instinct urged me to wrap my arms around him again, to hold him close to me and feel the warmth of his skin under my hands. I fought those instincts, kissing him back with every drop of my passion while I lay still beneath him.
There was an unaccustomed glitter in his eyes when he raised his head, along with a hunger I knew he planned not to sate, at least not tonight. I shivered, again not sure if it was because of anticipation or unease.
His head lowered once more, and he trailed kisses down my throat. I had to curl my hands into fists to keep from running my fingers through his hair. As he worked his way down, those circles he’d been drawing on my breast finally shrank until a single finger brushed my nipple, over and over. My back arched into that touch, but his hand moved away far before I was ready. The good news was his mouth was moving steadily south.
I didn’t completely understand the game he was playing until his mouth started circling my nipple, mimicking the pattern his fingers had made before, and his hand slid down past my navel. When I realized that his mouth was going to continue following the trail blazed by his fingers, I practically came right then and there. Maybe if I hadn’t been so tired, I would have.
He moved so slowly it was all I could do to keep myself from screaming my impatience. Mouth and fingers working in perfect synchronization, circling, circling, circling, but never quite getting to their final destinations. When I arched my back to try to get my nipple into his mouth, he carefully compensated for the movement, just as his fingers did when I lifted my hips.