When I finally peer up to his eyes, I look away quickly, but he doesn’t let me get away with it. He pushes me up against the vanity and pulls my chin to angle up to his face. When I give up and look to his eyes, he glares down at me, saying nothing, but he watches, and his mouth scowls and contorts in some inner anguish and turmoil I don’t understand. His gaze flits to the door, considering something that is again outside of my scope of understanding.
With one final harsh glare, he spins me to face the mirror. He leans his mouth toward my ear, and his words shock me and relieve me all at the same moment. “You take him, or you take me…” His words are spoken slowly and deliberately. He continues to watch my eyes in the mirror as he warns me. “He has a small dick, and I guarantee you, he’ll be easier for your body to take than I will be.”
But my decision was made the moment he gave me the option, and as I shake my head, he closes his eyes. “I want you.” It’s a whisper.
When his eyes open again, he looks worried, concerned. His anger is lost, and when he speaks again, his voice is gentle and resolved. “Damn it, Ash. Take your dress off.”
He moves from me as I undress. He searches in the bathroom drawers until he finds a tube of lubricant and a condom. He moves behind me as I lean to the vanity top, and as I hear his zipper, my eyes search his out and find he is already watching me closely. He runs his hand lightly down my back as my body stills. I’m terrified beyond words, but I can do this … I can do this with him. His hands trail between the cheeks of my bottom as they graze over my anus.
I flinch slightly, and at my pause, he speaks. “Stay relaxed. Relax every muscle in your bottom, even when you want to tense up. You have to stay relaxed.”
I start to tremble at his words, and new tears threaten to spring forth. He looks like he’s in pain, and I realize I can feel his engorged cock nudging my lower back. He’s aroused, and yet his eyes are worried beyond all measure. Images of his incredibly impressive cock float through my mind, usually so welcome, but I start to panic a little bit more with every breath. How can he fit? With this unwelcome question, the tension sets in, and my muscles do exactly what Derek has told me not to allow. He senses it, too, as his hand still lingers between my cheeks, gently caressing my skin.
He leans toward my ear once more, and speaks quietly and intimately. “I’ll go slow, but you have to relax.” His quiet words are purred into my ear. My stress starts to melt, and I do relax. Perhaps only marginally, but it’s a start.
He stands once again, and after applying an over-generous amount of lubricant to his finger, he parts my cheeks and gently starts to work the slick wetness into my bottom. He is slow, just as he was the first time he touched me in this way. Small, slow thrusting gradually moving deeper and deeper. Once his finger is all the way in, he withdraws and gently adds a second finger. He again moves from shallow thrusts, increasing deeper and deeper. His penetration and the incredibly serious and concerned look in his eyes turn me on. I’m wet, though he’s not touched my sex at all. I want his hands on me there, but I know I’ll have to wait. As he finally finishes readying my body for him, he lines himself up to my most secret entry. He’s watching my eyes, and I’m watching his as well.
I can still hear the conversation between Frederick and the man outside in my bedroom. The man is calm, but they are waiting for Derek and me to return. The man wants me to hold good to my word and finish what we’d started, and with a hasty look to my eyes, Derek whispers, “We don’t have much time.”
And with that, he rolls the condom onto his length, and slowly, incredibly slowly, starts pushing the head of his cock past the rim of my anus. The first push is painful, and I immediately tense and cry out, but his strokes are shallow and retreat quickly, and at his retreat, I start to relax again. The next shallow thrust moves just ever so slightly deeper. He is watching his cock penetrate my bottom. He’s studying every stroke, and controlling his every movement.
He continues to stroke shallow and retreat quickly, again building deeper and deeper with each push. And with every invasion, I learn to still my muscles and relax against the pain and firm, invasive force. The invasion, while controlled and gentle, is far more intense than anything I’ve ever felt. This supersedes losing my virginity to Derek, but I’m also desperate for it to be Derek, so I focus my entire mind on relaxing my muscles, and he pushes farther and farther. It’s astounding that my body is accommodating the length and girth of his cock in this way, and yet gradually, he moves deeper and deeper within me. This feeling is more filling, stretching, and aching than any sensation I’ve experienced with him. And Derek was right, every time I start to tense, the pain shoots through my body, and yet when I can keep my muscles relaxed, the pain fades to the background.
As his strokes continue to move deeper and deeper, he adds more lubrication to the rim of my anus. His movements are so controlled, and I can see it is a strain. He’s aroused, and his body wants to thrust and to fuck me, but he’s maintaining a very tight rein on his movements.
Once he’s buried deep inside me and his breathing is picking up, though he fights to keep his strokes even and smooth, he whispers, “I’m almost done, sweetie.”
His words send electricity through my body. I’d hated the pudgy romantic calling me “sweetie” a mere two nights before, but whispered from the lips of this man, the word is so personal and perfect—so very appropriate. I’m reminded that though terrified of what we’re doing, I’m still wet and dripping with desire for him. This act is turning out to be incredibly erotic and intimate, or maybe it’s just the way his eyes watch mine so carefully. His arousal is building, but he’s maintaining absolute control of his movements, and it is with gritted teeth and a pained look on his face that he finally comes, buried inside of me and dropping his forehead to my back. His clenching hands and shuddering breaths are the only movement of his body at all. When he’s done, he slowly pulls himself from my bottom, watching every last inch of himself leave my body. It’s done; he’s bought me two more weeks without this terror, and now butt man can’t touch me. I wouldn’t have had it any other way, and for all the discomfort, and even pain, I’d go through it all again with Derek. There is something so intensely erotic about having given him that one final part of my body. He raises his head from my back to meet my eyes. His concern is gone, and relief floods over his face.
As I stand, I stretch my back, and he picks up my dress from the floor, handing it to me. I slip it back on quickly as he dresses. I want to touch him. I want to kiss him, hold him, anything at all, but as I step toward him, he gives me a warning look. He finishes dressing, and then he leans toward my ear, reminding me that the cameras are on and security is watching.
We return to my bedroom, and as Fredrick takes in Derek’s untucked shirt, his face scrunches up, and he shakes his head. Butt man speaks first. “I want her. I want to fuck her ass, and I want you to make her.”
Derek, now replete and unfazed, responds, “I’m sorry. She wasn’t trained properly for anal sex. I’ve taken care of that, but she won’t be available for that service for another couple of weeks. I’m sure I can find another woman that will satisfy you far more than an inexperienced whore could.”
His words don’t sting in the least. They aren’t his feelings, and he’s only playing his part in this mess that, quite frankly, I created.
But butt man is pissed. “What the fuck does that mean? I paid for her, and I want her!”
“I’m sorry. I assumed you wouldn’t want her after she failed to do her job, and quite frankly, I thought a swift punishment was in order. I assure you, she won’t refuse a man her ass again. I’ve made certain she understands how to do her job. That also means she won’t be available for another two weeks. I’m so sorry.” The eat-shit look in Derek’s eyes isn’t fooling anyone, least of all butt man.