And that more is power itself.
So you, Mr. President, have no cards left because you’ve dealt them all. In the process of seducing so many potential enemies you lost your chance to chop off their heads. The result? You’re loved by neither your friends, to whom you gave everything, nor your enemies, to whom you gave a little. And you know it.
“A few minutes ago, he was my friend. Half an hour was enough to make him my enemy.”
Be honest. Don’t lie. How many times have you said these words to yourself?
Believe me. I’m your friend, and I fully understand your complaint:
“Yesterday they were all cheering me! Today they’re all silent. If only they’d insult me at least! Yesterday I was indispensable. Today I’m a nuisance. If only they’d kick me out at least!”
I feel exactly the same way. And that is exactly what I am doing now, Mr. President.
My aide, Jesús Ricardo Magón, will be delivering this letter to you personally. He will then accompany you to the door of your house. From there, a military escort befitting your status and rank will escort you to the international airport, where a very comfortable seat awaits you in the first-class cabin of a Qantas Airways plane, which will take you directly to the beautiful land of the kangaroo, Australia. Once there, don’t forget to take note, please, of the marsupials who carry their young in pouches, so as to ensure the healthy growth and development of their offspring, and in turn of their descendants.
Extending you the assurance of my distinguished consideration and
wishing you a good journey,
Nicolás Valdivia
59. GENERAL MONDRAGÓN VON BERTRAB TO NICOLÁS VALDIVIA
Mr. Secretary, esteemed friend, in keeping with the principles of the republic and in compliance with Article 89, section VI of the constitution, I would like to inform you that in the early hours of the morning of today I saw to the death of General don Cícero Arruza, found guilty of sedition and of attempting to overthrow the legitimate government of this country by the ad hoc military tribunal that I assembled to address this urgent situation, in the knowledge that my actions would be fully supported and sanctioned by you, in the absence of an acting president following the terrible loss of President Lorenzo Terán.
You know as well as I do that there are times when it is incumbent upon the armed forces to act with speed, as long as these actions are in the interest of protecting our republican institutions.
General Cícero Arruza’s criminal intent is patent in the numerous letters he has sent me since the onset of the crisis in January, written with a recklessness that I can only attribute to drunken spirits. Reader that I am of both Clausewitz and Machiavelli, I cannot help but invert the German’s terms here and remark that politics is a continuation of war by other means. And as to the Florentine thinker, I would say that it is better to take preventive measures during times of peace than allow ourselves to be surprised during times of war. The threat posed by General Arruza’s coup attempt has been thoroughly eliminated.
I regret to inform you that General Arruza was discovered in bed, in the throes of an adulterous affair with Josefina Almazán, wife of our honorable treasury secretary, Andino Almazán. The general attempted to reach for a gun from beneath his pillow, and this, as you might imagine, provoked a response from the men sent to apprehend him. Unfortunately, the gunshots did not spare Mrs. Almazán, whose body has since been delivered to her husband, whose resignation, if I am not mistaken, should already be in your possession.
Mr. Secretary, I trust that you will understand and support my decision to remove General Arruza’s wounded body from the bed and to transport him in his last hours to the military headquarters of Military Zone XXVIII in Mérida. There, his body was placed standing up against a wall so that he could be put to his death in a manner worthy of his unquestionable military merits. I would like to say that he was afraid. He was not. Not because he was brave. Bravery was not possible for him at that moment: He no longer had a gun to speak his truth.
His last words from the bed were, “Nobody makes a fool of me.”
Later, as he took his last gulps of air, his body against the wall, he managed to say, “What’s the matter with you? Fire! Or don’t you have the balls?”
With respect, and in recognition of my obligation to render a faithful account of the aforementioned events, I remain, as always, under your command today and in any and all future circumstances that I may consider favorable for you and for our nation.
General Mondragón von Bertrab, DEM
P.S. The Yucatán is full of rock pools and underwater caves. Arruza has gone to a watery grave.
60. CONGRESSMAN ONÉSIMO CANABAL TO NICOLÁS VALDIVIA
To the president: With great satisfaction I hereby fulfill my constitutional obligation and inform you that, in strict adherence to Article 84 of the Political Constitution of the United Mexican States and in the absence of the plenary of the Honorable Congress of the Union that I am proud to preside over, I have convened the permanent commission of the same in the interest of pursuing the proceedings with respect to the appointment of the acting president who shall conclude the presidential term of don Lorenzo Terán, following his unfortunate death last week.
In the presence of all the members of the permanent commission and following the initiative of Paulina Tardegarda, congressional representative of the state of Hidalgo, the members of the commission have unanimously voted in favor of you, Nicolás Valdivia, currently serving as interior secretary, to assume the functions of the chief executive of the country, in the capacity of acting president.
The Congress of the Union, which I have convened in an extraordinary session in its faculty as electoral college, has unanimously ratified the aforementioned decision and, as such, you, don Nicolás Valdivia, are hereby invested as Acting President of the United Mexican States effective as of this date and until the date of the constitutional change of powers on the first day of December of the year 2024.
I would like to extend my congratulations to you, as well as my invitation to assume your position in a solemn ceremony on the fifth day of May of this year at five in the afternoon. I would also like to take the opportunity, Mr. President, to offer the assurance of my highest esteem and my best wishes for the success of the appointment that the nation has bestowed upon you.
Onésimo Canabal
PRESIDENT, HONORABLE CONGRESS OF THE UNION
61. JESÚS RICARDO MAGÓN TO NICOLÁS VALDIVIA
Mission accomplished, Mr. President. With the authority you lend me, I find all doors wide open. Even the doors of a fortress like the one at San Juan de Ulúa, that castle to which you sent me because you can trust me, because I answer only to you, because I hold your secrets and because if I betray you I betray myself.
“Only you can do me this immense favor,” you said to me, Nicolás. “There’s no one else I can trust.”
With sadness I looked at your sadness. It was almost as if you were saying to me, “This is the last favor I’ll ask of you. After this, if that’s what you want, we won’t see each other again!. .”
Instead, you said, “You’re going to drink from the most bitter chalice of all.”
You looked at me with an intolerable air of philosophical complicity. (Oh, how I have begun to identify and despise your tics.)