We trudge down the hall in silence, but then a thought occurs to me. I make a dead stop, and Zeta and Indigo do the same. They turn to look at me.
“Where were you?” I demand of Zeta.
He grimaces. “1942. Sent on a last-minute mission by a very frantic Alpha that turned out to be nothing.” His face contorts into a look of physical pain, and he walks away, as if standing here talking about it is too much to bear. He stops in front of the elevator, the doors open, and we file in. Zeta pushes the button for the fourth floor. “I should have known something was wrong based on his demeanor. I never should have gone. Then I would have been there and—”
He doesn’t finish the thought. I look away. I’m sorry I asked. As it is, I’m sure he’s going to beat himself up for years over being on a bogus mission when his daughter was shot.
We get off the elevator and are greeted by a glass door with a buzzer on the wall. Zeta scans a card that opens the door for us. And then we’re in the ICU. All the doors are glass, and the rooms are tiny. I see Yellow right away. She’s in the third room, lying in bed, staring at the ceiling. She looks like hell. There are dark-purple circles under her eyes, and she’s whiter than the sheets she’s lying. She looks up and sees me staring at her from the other side of the glass, so I slide open the door and walk in. As I do, I notice her name has been written on a dry-erase strip outside the door.
ELIZABETH MASTERS
She’ll always be Yellow to me. And Indigo is always going to be Indigo, now that I think about it. I’ll probably be Iris to them. It’s who we are.
“Hey,” I whisper.
“Please tell me it’s all over. Please tell me I didn’t take a bullet for no reason.”
“It’s all over.”
Yeah, it’s nowhere close to being over. The investigation hasn’t even begun. But there’s no need to trouble Yellow with the details now.
Yellow nods. “Good.” She closes her eyes, then opens them a few seconds later. “Getting shot hurts like a bitch, in case you were wondering.”
“I would have guessed as much.”
“So that was your boyfriend, huh?”
“Was my boyfriend is right.” It sounds so wrong when I say it.
“You broke up?”
“No.” I think about it. “Maybe.” I think some more. “No. I don’t know what happened.”
“Are you going to start dating my brother now?”
I turn my head to look out the windowed doors, where Zeta and Indigo are standing with arms crossed looking in. Indigo gives me a little smile, and I return it. Then I look back at Yellow. “Not a chance. Your brother’s a great guy, but no. We’re friends. Besides, he uses finger quotes. I could never be with a guy who uses finger quotes.”
And Abe and I aren’t over. Screw the universe. Screw the house. We’ll find our way back together.
“Okay, good,” Yellow says. “Because that would be totally weird if my friend was dating my little brother.”
“So we’re friends then?”
“Um, duh,” Yellow says. “I took a bullet for you.”
“Technically you didn’t,” I point out. “Blue just got a little jumpy.”
She smiles. It’s a weak smile, and I can tell her eyes are struggling to stay open.
“I’m going to let you rest,” I say. “I’m really glad you didn’t die today, Yellow.”
“That makes two of us.” And then she closes her eyes.
I slide the door closed behind me as softly as I can. Zeta reaches out and squeezes me on the shoulder.
“So where do we go from here?” I ask.
Zeta swallows. Then he shrugs. “You go back to Annum Hall. I go . . . somewhere for now. I’m out.”
I gasp. “What? Why?”
“I’m being investigated, too. We all are, but my generation is being more heavily scrutinized than yours is.” He gives a weak laugh. “My generation. I’m pretty much the only one left from my generation.”
His eyes are sad, and I look away. I can’t take one more sad, defeated person today.
“I’m not allowed within fifty feet of the hall until the investigation is complete,” Zeta says.
I don’t say anything. I look down at my feet.
“And for the record,” Zeta continues, “the investigation is going to show that I knew nothing about what Alpha was doing.”
I look at Zeta. He’s staring at me with those scary, intense eyes. But behind them is a softness, a look of concern.
“You knew my dad,” I say. It’s one hell of a subject change, but I don’t care.
“I did know your dad. I knew him well. Since childhood.”
“And?” I say, looking from Zeta to Indigo and then back to Zeta.
“And let me make it clear to you that I didn’t know you were Delta’s daughter until today. I want you to know that. I’d never met you or seen a picture of you or anything like that until the day Alpha brought you to us. Your mom was fiercely protective of you, Iris. She completely cut you off from our world, and for good reason, I now see.”
I swallow the lump in my throat.
“And what if I decide that I’m done with Annum Guard? That I don’t want to be a part of it anymore?”
“Well, that’s your choice. But I know that I’d be disappointed. You’re a good addition to the Guard. We’re a broken, bleeding Guard, but we’ll continue.”
I nod. “I want to come back.” I do. I don’t think I realized it until this exact moment, but I do. I’m going to go to Vermont, make things right with my mom, and then I’ll be back. Annum Guard feels like a part of me. It’s in my blood. It’s who I am. And I feel like I owe it to the Obermann name to prove that we can do it right, without the corruption. “But what if they don’t want me back?”
“Of course we do!” Indigo says.
“I broke just about every rule we have. I projected in front of people. A lot of people. I changed the past.”
“Oh, of course you changed the past!” Zeta says. “That’s what we do. We give you the ‘enhancing, not altering’ lingo in the beginning; but when it comes down to it, a change is a change. A minor tweak has the potential to change the past just as much as a material alteration. We just try to do our homework ahead of time and make sure we’re not in danger of changing the world for the worse.”
“So changing the past is okay?”
“It can be.”
“In that case, I need to talk to you about something. Alone. It’s important.”
Zeta takes a breath, then turns to Indigo. “Go see your sister.”
“What?” Indigo’s head whips to the glass door. “She’s asleep.”
“I don’t care,” Zeta says. “Go see her. Now.”
We wait until Indigo has shut the sliding glass door behind him. Then I turn back to Zeta. “What’s your security clearance like?”
Zeta raises an eyebrow. “What did it used to be like, or what is it like now? If you need sensitive information this minute, you’re out of luck.”
“I’m not talking about log-ins and passwords,” I say. “What’s your building clearance? Like, for instance, in this hospital?”
“Ah.” Zeta slowly nods his head and unclips the plain white pass key from his belt that got us into the ICU. “They forgot to take this from me. I’m sure they’ll figure it out any second now, but in the meantime you saw the doors it can open. I’m sure I could go observe a brain surgery if I wanted to.”
I hold out my hand. “Can I borrow that for a few hours? I have some unfinished business I need to take care of.”
Zeta hesitates for a second but then hands me the key. “I trust you.”
I close my hands around it. “Thank you,” I whisper. And then I walk out of the ICU.
CHAPTER 30
I dress a little more appropriately this time. I’m in the dress I wore for the Boston Massacre, corset and all. The corset was not by choice. I tried to lace up the dress without it, but hell if it isn’t tighter than it was a few days ago. I mean, a few months ago.