Beth and Toby arrived just before noon, in street clothes. Rick let them in and directed them to the bedrooms upstairs to change; he and Lon followed Toby to Rick’s bedroom to talk. Lon opened it up, "Dude, I gotta warn you — Jean’s upped the ante."
"Oh?" Toby, shucking out of his jeans, looked up.
"Oh, yeah! She’s in a thong, Man — and the top that goes with it makes that white rig she was wearing on Monday look like a bed sheet!"
"Shit, really?" Toby flicked his eyes at Rick.
"Really," Rick confirmed. "I almost shit a brick! I kinda got my nose rubbed in the fact that Mom’s a woman…"
Toby turned away while he pulled off his Reeboks, his voice curiously muffled as he replied, "Yeah, that shit sneaks up on you…" Lon flicked Rick a significant glance; Rick got it — time to move on to other, less embarrassing things. "We figure that makes you the front-runner, given how she’s been acting."
Toby continued to find reasons to look in another direction, "Are you sure you’re okay with this, Man?"
Rick sighed. "Yeah. Clearly, she’s been doing without while she buried herself in making sure I had laundry and stuff. As long as the lights are green from her end, I’ve got no problem with it. Heck, I feel kind of bad, actually — like I’ve been hogging her and not giving anything back…"
Lon shook his head. "I don’t think I’d worry about that, Man. I know she went out with Mama a couple of times, and Mama said she was hopeless. I think she needs training wheels as bad as we do!"
Toby looked up. "Speaking of hopeless … Go easy on Ma, Lon. The four Fs aren’t the way to go with her. She’s … delicate. You just ride her and dump her and she’s gonna crash."
Lon nodded. "Done deal, Man. Full romantic treatment. That’s all around, Dudes; these women mean something to us, so remember that blowing your load isn’t the ONLY thing on the agenda — right?" Toby and Rick both nodded.
Rick brought up the other issue. "Toby, Lon and I are SURE my Mom heard us when we made the pact. We think that’s why she turned out in the bikini on Monday, and it’s why we’re having this thing today!
"I don’t get it," Toby replied. "If she DID hear, why did she turn out like that? And why did she let me get away with the stuff I did?"
Rick shrugged. Lon had a theory, however. "Like Rick said, it was a test. Jean probably knew that if she told Mama what we were up to, Mama would blow it off as bullshit — so she set us up to see if we were serious." He chuckled. "She was watching me, Man — and you sneaked in under the radar and got off a full spread of torpedoes before she knew she was looking the wrong way!"
Toby grinned. "I don’t know whether to be pleased or pissed off!"
"Be pleased, Man!" Lon replied. "You’ve made it all possible! If we’d done nothing, they’d have just laughed about it when she told them. If you had hit and bounced, we’d have all gotten a good talking to about our dirty minds. But you rolled right over her — and that said that we were not only serious, but that we had the tools to do the job! Now they’re out there, conniving, trying to figure out what to do about the whole thing, rather than just whipping motherly outrage on us…"
"So they all know, you figure?" Toby asked. Rick nodded, solemnly. "Well, that explains a couple of things…"
"Like what?" Rick asked.
"Like Ma buying a bikini…"
"Oh, no shit?" Lon collapsed onto Rick’s bed, laughing.
"No shit!" Toby looked angry. "It isn’t strings or anything, Man! It looks GOOD, actually! Are you sure you’re up to treating Ma right? Maybe I should shift to your mom and let Rick do mine…"
"I’m sorry, Man — that sucked." Lon got control, rapidly, in the face of Toby’s anger. "I was out of line. I TOLD you, Man — I’m looking forward to doing your mom — and I’m gonna use kid gloves, promise!"
"All right." Toby was only partly mollified.
"Look, Dude, if you sense disrespect, just let me know and we’ll all switch targets — but that’ll probably fuck us up, for today, anyway…" Lon insisted.
"Yeah, whatever," Toby grunted. "I don’t want to lose my investment…"
"Wait’ll you get a look at her in that suit!" Lon replied. "We won’t be able to tear you loose with a crowbar!"
Beth dressed quickly and went downstairs; the boys' conversation in the next room was a rumble that she was afraid to eavesdrop on. Arriving in the kitchen, she found the other two leaning over the bar and gabbing. "I see you put it on after all," she addressed Jean, feigning disgust. "Why don’t you just put a couple of band-aids over your nipples and get it over with? How am I going to compete with that?" She smiled to take the sting out.
Candace chuckled. "You don’t HAVE to! There you stand with those eighteen-inch assault guns on your chest and you complain because Jean uncovers a little antiaircraft emplacement? Heck, in a lot of ways, Jean is built like a slow-blooming fourteen-year-old — she needs all the help she can get!"
"Hey!" Jean squealed. "Thanks a lot!" Candace grinned from ear to ear. Glancing at Beth, Jean changed the subject, "I was just telling Candace — Lon’s started calling me Jean…"
Candace nodded. "Honey, it’s something they’re ALL going to have to do — and something we’re going to have to allow. Think about it — Jean is a woman I know — somebody whose pants I want to get into. Mrs. Flanders is some old hag who is somebody’s mother…" Jean looked outraged, but Candace pressed on, "They have to present themselves as adults and our contemporaries, or they’ll never break down the barriers! Calling us Mrs. So-and-so introduces an age barrier; it reminds EVERYBODY that you’re somebody’s mother…"
Jean shrugged and nodded — it made sense, once you looked at it. Beth nodded, too, turning it over in her head. "It’s not disrespect — they’re just trying to level the playing field."
"Exactly," Candace agreed. "Chasing a woman named Beth is a normal activity for young horndogs — but chasing Mrs. Tolliver is like something out of The Graduate. I don’t want to be treated like an old woman — and I’m betting you don’t either…" That got universal nods.
"Okay, so," Jean sighed. "If you could remind me — what are we doing here?"
Candace sighed. Jean wouldn’t accept the obvious answer, yet — she’d have to feed her bullshit — again! "We’re testing them. We’re going to push them, gently, until they run out of guts and give up on this crazy scheme." She glanced over Jean’s shoulder at Beth, whose face was closed; that wasn’t BETH’s agenda, either, but it sounded good…
Jean looked dubious; she’d tried that tactic Monday night — and it got her felt up! "Are we pushing, here, or giving ground? And what happens if they DON’T run out of guts?"
Candace sighed and waxed pedantic. "It’s the same thing, Jean. If they push, and we give ground, eventually they’ll hit a point where they’ll realize they’ve gone too far and they’ll back off."
"And if they don’t?"
"I’m prepared for that eventuality," Candace replied, locking eyes with Jean. Then she waited; the next words out of Jean’s mouth would be a flat-out lie…
Jean didn’t disappoint. "Well, I’m not! Heck, why don’t we just go out on the pool deck, get naked, and each of us pull a boy on top of us, for God’s sake? That’s where things appear to be headed…"
"For one thing, you miss a point of the exercise, Hon. The boys need to learn how to treat a woman right. They won’t learn a damned thing about girls if you just hand it to them — in fact, you’ll be teaching them habits that might get them arrested for rape!" Candace countered. "They need to learn that they have to earn it, and how to read the signals."