You lost nothing by doing so, Wren.
“Didn’t I?”
They faced each other, silent, motionless. Everything that had happened to Wren since Cogline had first come to her those many weeks past seemed to gather and settle on her shoulders like an enormous weight. So many harrowing escapes, so many deaths, so much lost—she felt it all, the whole of it, come together in a single moment, in this truth terrible and unexpected.
Had you known before coming, it might have changed everything. Your mother understood that. Your father as well. Perhaps I would have told you if I could, but my promise bound me. The big frame shifted, and the sharply etched bones of the other’s face lifted into the light. Tell me, if you can, that I should have done otherwise. Tell me, Wren, that I should have broken my promise.
Her mouth was a tight, bitter line. “You should have.”
He held her gaze, dark eyes flat and expressionless.
“No,” she admitted finally, tears in her eyes. “You shouldn’t have.” She looked away, empty and lost. “But that doesn’t help. Everyone has lied to me. Everyone. Even you. The Addershag was right, Garth, and that’s what hurts. There were too many lies, too many secrets, and I wasn’t part of any of them.”
She cried silently, head lowered. “Someone should have trusted me. My whole life has been changed, and I have had nothing to say about it. Look what’s been done!”
One big hand brushed her own. Think, Wren The choices have all been yours. No one has made them for you: no one has shown you the way. Had you known the truth of things, had you understood the expectations held for you, would it have been the same? Could you say the choices were yours in that case?
She looked back, hesitant.
Would it have been better to know you were Ellenroh Elessedil’s granddaughter, that the Elfstones you thought painted rocks were real, that when you grew to womanhood you would one day be expected to travel to Morrowindl and, because of a prophecy given before you were born, save the Elves‘’ How free would you have been to act then? How much would you have grown? What would you have become?
She took a deep breath. “I don’t know. But perhaps I should have been given the chance to find out.”
The light was stronger now as dawn broke somewhere beyond the pall of the mist and trees. Faun lifted her head from out of Wren’s lap where she had lain motionless. Triss had come back from the edge of the dark; he stood watching them in silence. The night sounds had died away, and the frantic movement had ceased. In the distance, the sounds of Killeshan’s eruption continued unabated, steady and ominous. The earth shook faintly, and the fire of the lava rose skyward into gray smoke and ash.
Garth stirred, his hands moving. Wren, he signed. I did what I was asked, what I promised I did the best I could I wish it had not been necessary to deceive you. I wish I had been able to give you the chance you ask for.
She looked at him for a long time, and finally nodded. “I know.”
The strong, dark face was rigid with concentration. Don’t be angry with your mother and father They did what they thought they had to do, what they believed was right.
She nodded again. She did not trust herself to speak.
You must find a way to forgive us all.
She swallowed hard. “I wish... I wish I didn’t hurt so much.”
Wren, look at me.
She did so, reluctantly, warily.
We are not finished yet There is one thing more.
She felt a chill settle in the pit of her stomach, an ache of something sensed but not yet fully realized. She saw Stresa appear out of the trees to one side, lumbering heavily, winded and damp. He slowed as he approached them, aware that something was happening, a confrontation perhaps, a revelation, a thing inviolate.
“Stresa,” Wren greeted quickly, anxious to avoid hearing any more from Garth.
The Splinterscat swung his blunt cat face from one human to the other. “We can go now,” he said. “In fact, we should. The mountain is coming down. Sooner or later it will reach here.”
“We must hurry,” she agreed, rising. She snatched up the Ruhk Staff, then looked down anxiously at her injured friend. “Garth?”
We need to speak alone first.
Her throat tightened anew. “Why?”
Ask the others to go ahead a short distance and wait for us Tell them we won’t he long.
She hesitated, then looked at Stresa and Triss. “I need a moment with Garth. Wait for us up ahead. Please.”
They stared back at her without speaking, then nodded reluctantly, Triss first, lean face expressionless, and Stresa with sharp-eyed suspicion.
“Take Faun,” she asked as an afterthought, disengaging the Tree Squeak from its perch on her shoulder and setting it gently on the ground.
Stresa hissed at the little creature and sent it racing off into the trees. He looked back at her with sad, knowing eyes. “Call, rwwwlll Wren of the Elves, if you need us.”
When they had gone, the sound of their footsteps fading, she faced Garth once more, the Staff gripped tightly in both hands. “What is it?”
The big man beckoned. Don’t be frightened Here Sit next to me Listen a moment and don’t interrupt.
She did as he asked, kneeling close enough that her leg was pressed up against his body. She could feel the heat of his fever. Mist and pale light obscured him in a shading of gray, and the world about was fuzzy and thick with heat.
She lay the Ruhk Staff down beside her, and Garth’s big hands began to sign.
Something is happening to me Inside. The Wisteron’s poison, I think It creeps through me like a living thing, fire that sears and deadens. I can feel it working about, changing me. It is a bad feeling.
“I’ll wash the wounds again, rebind them.”
No, Wren. What is happening now is beyond that, beyond anything you can do. The poison is in my system, all through me.
Her breath was hurried, angry. “If you are too weak, we will carry you.”
I was weak at first, but the weakness is passing now. I am growing stronger again. But the strength is not my own.
She stared at him, not really understanding, but frightened all the same. She shook her head. “What are you saying?”
He looked at her with fierce determination, his dark eyes hard, his face all angles and planes, chiseled in stone. The Wisteron was a Shadowen. Like the Draculs. Remember Eowen?
She shuddered, jerked back and tried to rise. He grabbed her and held her in place, keeping their eyes locked. Look at me.
She tried and couldn’t. She saw him and at the same time didn’t, aware of the lines that framed him but unable to see the colors and shadings between, as if doing so would reveal the truth she feared. “Let me go!”
Then everything broke within her, and she began to cry. She did so soundlessly, and only the heaving of her shoulders gave her away. She closed her eyes against the rage of feelings within, the horror of the world about her, the terrible price it seemed to require over and over again. She saw Garth even there, etched within her mind—the dark confidence and strength radiating from his face, the smile he reserved exclusively for her, the wisdom, the friendship, and the love.
“I can’t lose you,” she whispered, no longer bothering to sign, the words a murmur. “I can’t!”
His hands released her, and her eyes opened. Look at me.
She took a deep breath and did so.
Look into my eyes.
She did. She looked down into the soul of her oldest and most trusted friend. A wicked red glimmer looked back.
It already begins, he signed.
She shook her head in furious denial.