It’s funny how thoughts, even inane (or insane) ones, have a habit of wriggling their way through your psychoses. That’s why therapists are (were) some of the most screwed up people on the planet. It’s impossible to listen to that many people with that many problems and not begin to inherit more than your fair share of them. Just think about it. What if I were to tell you that before you sat on that public toilet a grotesquely dirty male/female had just sat there and they had crusty sores that leaked a viscous oozing liquid that slightly resembled phlegm from a person suffering from bronchitis. You know what I’m talking about, that thick green/brown lung cookie. And that these seeping pustules carried small microscopic teethy worms that will burrow into your soft exposed flesh spreading their infection throughout your body. Will you ever be able to look at a toilet ring the same again? Or will you picture miniature monsters awaiting their chance to do you harm.
“Talbot, you’re doing it to me again!” Tracy yelled.
“What I didn’t say it.” I said surprised.
“Did BT think about zombie cockroaches on his own?” Tracy asked.
“Well yeah, he did.” I answered her honestly. “I mean I might have brought up something about Bambi.”
“Bambi? Really Talbot?”
“He did say something about nothing being left to rein the crazy in.” BT threw in for good measure.
“Thanks man.” I said to BT
“Anytime, there’s enough room under this bus for the both of us.”
“Is it a double-decker? Although that wouldn’t really mean any more room underneath it.” I said as I started to wonder if there would be more room or not. I felt the heat of two sets of eyes on me.
“Talbot sometimes I wonder how you got us this far.” Tracy said.
“What?”
“The shots. Remember those?”
“I was getting to it.” I said, but in fact I wasn’t. I had completely forgotten about them, so intent was I on flesh eating rabbits.
“Zombies came ashore.” She answered.
“Ashore, what the hell does that mean?” BT asked
"Ashore like in landing craft?" I asked
I got the look that was becoming all too common. The, 'are you crazy glare.'
"No boats then?" I added.
"Yeah no boats." She shook her head and continued. "Dozens of them just started walking up the beach. Caught an older couple that was getting a little randy behind some dunes."
"At least they went out happy." I said. The words were out of my mouth long before I realized how tasteless a statement that was.
Tracy thought it. BT said it. "Fuck Talbot what is your problem?"
"What?" the dawn of recognition coming slowly. "Oh sorry, I wasn't even thinking."
"I wouldn't mind so much but it seems to happen more and more." Tracy said.
"I'm sorry let's get past this." Of course I wanted to, it was my shattered reputation on the line. Tracy reluctantly let it go. "Was this the first time?"
"The first time you've inserted your foot in your mouth or the first time the zombies have come up the beach?"
BT pointed at Tracy and nodded. "Good one."
"Funny, but deserved." I said. "Let's go with the beaching."
"I'll tell you what, the Army guys were running around like chickens without heads and the Marines looked pretty concerned."
"So I'm going to go with a yes on that then."
"What do you think it means Talbot?" BT asked me.
"I've got a couple of ideas BT, and none of them are good. You still want to hear them?"
"No." BT answered truthfully. "Well get on with it."
"Well first off it could mean that some zombies fell into the water sometime in the last few weeks, maybe off of some transport ship and just finally made it ashore here."
"Eh, maybe." BT said shaking his head in the negative. "Next."
"Some local zombies have figured out a more viable option of how to get into the gated buffet."
"Possible." BT said. "Or?"
"Or Eliza sent some forward troops in the hopes of finding some weaknesses to this base's defenses."
BT eased his back down towards the pillow. "Shit."
"Eliza? Already?" Tracy asked, hoping against hope that I was wrong.
"It feels like something she would do. I know the zombies have some rudimentary intelligence. I just can't imagine that they'd be able to pass tactics to each other. Possibly one might figure out that he could walk into the water and bypass all the fences and guns but not dozens at least not all at once."
"Okay though Mike." BT said. "If this is Eliza in all of this, why tip her hand now? She had to know that a few dozen zombies weren't going to breach this place. She could have waited until she had a few thousand zombies. That would have really thrown this place into mass chaos. These military guys aren't dummies. Now they're going to set up defenses and patrols."
I pondered BT's question. Eliza's actions made absolutely no sense. Unless. "It's a feint."
"What?" BT and Tracy asked simultaneously.
"Jinx!" I yelled. "Now you guys have to get me a coke! Man, what I wouldn’t do for that carbonated drink of pure refreshment right now."
"Are we on hidden cameras? Are you getting sponsorship money for your product endorsements? Can you get back to the 'feint' thing."
"Sorry that just sounds so good, in a tall glass with lots of ice and the huge condensation droplets sweating on the outside of the glass."
"Talbot." Tracy and BT once again said in synch.
"Again! Huh! This gets better and better."
Tracy glared at me.
"Sorry, sorry." I reiterated. "It's just that my mouth is so dry right now."
"Talbot!" BT shouted. "If my leg wasn't busted I would run all around this base to find you that damn Coke just so I could bust it over your head. Now what are you talking about? Although that does sound really good, maybe with a little vanilla in it."
"I'm leaving." Tracy said.
"Hold on hon." I said coming back to a Cokeless reality. "Eliza has something else planned, she has to know that this place only has so many resources to combat a threat and she is going to stretch those resources as thin as she can. I don't have a clue as to what she's thinking but it's obviously better than having a water assault."
"Seemed like a pretty good plan to me." BT said
"Yeah me too, so whatever she's thinking must be even better."
The room must have dropped twenty degrees because we all shuddered in unison. I don't think there is a 'jinx' rule for that.
"How's your leg feeling now?" I asked BT in all seriousness.
"Better by the minute." He answered.
Tracy garnered what we were talking about. "Neither of you two is in any sort of condition to go back on the road. Mike you have literally died twice in the span of five days. And don't even say it! Three is not the charm."
"How'd she know I was going to say that?" I asked BT.
BT shrugged his shoulders, and then miraculously hit his power down button.
"How does he do that?" I now asked the slumbering giant.
"Mike?"
"I know Tracy, we can't leave. I'm not sure I could get out of this bed and make it into the head to take a piss without passing out. Eliza just keeps forcing our hand. There's still time but the meter is definitely running.
CHAPTER TWELVE - JOURNAL ENTRY 6 - 
"Mike you awake?"
"What is it with hospitals?" I asked with my eyes closed. "You keep giving me sedatives to sleep and tell me I need rest so that I can recuperate and then you wake me up every half hour to see how I'm doing."
"Mike." The Doc said calmly. "You've been asleep for nearly 36 hours."
"Holy shit, no wonder why I kept having dreams about pissing. In one of them I was at an old abandoned town pool. It was empty when I got to it but I started to take a leak and it was filling at this really alarming rate, and I was like 'Holy crap this had better stop soon or its going to over flow and I'm going to be really embarrassed when my piss starts flowing down the streets and into storm drains The whole time I'm taking this piss I don't feel any relief. I am never getting that satisfactory release of pressure from my bladder. You know what I mean Doc?"