Psychological disorder styles, 64 Psychological issues, early, 99-105;
avoidant disorder of childhood and adolescence, 99-102; early parental relationships, 102-5; early trauma, 102
Psychopathology, in critics, 172 Public speaking, 65, 156, 176 Push techniques, 163-65
Quality Assurance Project, 3, 7, 123,
137
Rationalization, 58- 60 Reassurance, 148-50, 166-67 Regression, 17 Rejection, fear of, 7-8, 171 Relational idealism, 15-16, 126, 210-12 Relationships: nonparental, early,
105-6; nonworking, 153; parental, early, 102-5
Relaxation techniques, 142 Religious leaders, relationships with, 106 Remedies, ineffective, 165-66
Repression, 17 Resignation defenses, 126 Resistances, 120-21, 127, 169-70,
200, 201
Right-brain activity, creating, 142 Role-playing, 135, 140, 206
Secondary gain, dealing with, 126-27 Self-consciousness, 10 Self-criticism, 172 Self-devaluation, projection of, 94 Self-esteem, 8-9, 179-83, 203, 204 Self-help, 195-214; acceptance, 208; anger, 202-3; boredom, 212; changes, real-life, 202; cognitive errors, 209; consultative action, 206-7; criticism, 209; defenses, healthy, 204; dissociation, 212; dream analysis, 209; forgiveness, 208; friends and family, 207-8; health and appearance, 212-13; healthy/normal avoidances, 19798; helping others become less avoidant, 212; journaling, 200-202; motivation, 198-200; nonavoidance, trial forays into, 206; prevention, 196-97; profession, selecting, 196; prognosis, 197; projection, unhealthy, 204; relational philosophy, 210-12; resistances to improvement, 200, 201; role-playing, 206; self-esteem,
203, 204; shyness, 203-4; therapy, evaluating need for, 213-14; transactional insight, 205-6; traumas, 204-5; vicious cycles, 208-9 Self-modeling, video, 159, 165-66 Self-studies, evidence-based, 183 Seven-year itch avoidants, 34-36, 87 Sexual avoidance, 45-55; acquired, 48-50; cautions, 153; description, 45-50; development, 50-52; innate/essential, 45-47; options of last resort, 190-91; paradoxical therapy for, 141; parents and, 191; prevention, 185-86; prognosis, 191-92; psychodynamics, 53-54; specific sexual symptoms, 54-55;
therapeutic errors, 192; treatment, 185-92
Shyness, timidity, and withdrawal, 3, 6-7, 106-7. See also Self-help Siblings, 103, 105 Social anxiety, 148 Social awkwardness, 10-11 Social phobia, 61-66, 166 Social skills training, 137 Society, identification with, 19-28 Somatic complaints, 74 “Some Character-Types Met with in Psychoanalytic Work” (Freud), 12 Sons, sexual avoidance development in, 51-52
Sour grapes, 59 Specific phobia, 61 Stimulation enhancement, in sexual avoidance reduction, 186 Successophobia, 86 - 88 Supplemental approaches, 127-31, 155-57, 165-66
Supportive therapy, 147-57; advice, bad, 155; advice, good, 150-55; liking and respecting patients,
147; overview, 112, 116-17; reassurance, 148-50; supplemental approaches, 155-57 Sympathy, 170
Temperament, inherited, 106-7 Therapy: avoidance creation in,
167-68; cognitive, 112, 133-37; dimensions, 112; evaluating need for, 213-14; family,
117-18, 168-69; fixed role, 202; group, 160; ideal techniques, 163-70; interpersonal, 112, 116, 143-45, 159-60; marital/couple, 159-60; normal avoidance as part of, 41; paradoxical, 140-41; pharmacotherapy, 112, 160-61; technique of last resort, 161-62; video self-modeling, 159, 165-66.
See also Behavioral therapy; Cognitive-behavioral therapy; Psychodynamically oriented psychotherapy; Supportive therapy Thinking: catastrophic, 96-97, 136; errors in, 144, 209; negative, 95; projective/paranoid, 93-94 Third parties, putting between avoidants and critics, 176 Thompson, Clara, 31 Time to meet people, lack of, as rationalization, 58
Timidity, 3, 6-7, 106-7. See also Self-help
Total push techniques, 163-65 Transference resistances, 120-21, 127, 169 -70
Trauma, early, 102, 204-5 Type I avoidant personality disorder, 3-28; DSM-IV criteria, 3-4, 6-11; non-DSM-lV criteria, 4-6, 11-28; push techniques, 165; Type II versus, 29
Type II avoidant personality disorder,
29- 36; Type Ila, 30-34, 165; Type Ilb, 34-36, 165; Type IIc, 36
Type IIa avoidant personality disorder,
30- 34, 165
Type IIb avoidant personality disorder, 34-36, 165
Type IIc avoidant personality disorder, 36
Unhealthy defenses, 126 Unhealthy projection, 204 Unworthiness, projection of, 94
Validation, consensual, 151 Vicious cycles, interrupting, 180-81,
208 -9
Video self-modeling, 159, 165-66
Withdrawal, 3, 6-7, 106-7. See also Self-help
Women, sexual avoidance in, 52, 53
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MARTIN KANTOR, MD, is a Harvard psychiatrist who has been in full private practice in Boston and New York City and active in residency training programs at several hospitals, including Massachusetts General and Beth Israel in New York. He also served as assistant clinical professor of psychiatry at Mount Sinai Medical School and as clinical assistant professor of psychiatry at the University of Medicine and Dentistry of New Jersey-New Jersey Medical School. He is author of 18 other books, including Homophobia: The State of Sexual Bigotry Today (Praeger, 2009); Uncle Sam's Shame: Inside the Veteran's Administration (Praeger, 2008); Lifting the Weight: Understanding Depression in Men: Its Causes and Solutions (Praeger, 2007); The Psychopathy of Everyday Life: How Antisocial Personality Disorder Affects All of Us (Praeger, 2006); Understanding Paranoia: A Guide for Professionals, Families, and Sufferers (Praeger, 2004); Distancing: Avoidant Personality Disorder, Revised and Expanded (Praeger, 2003); Passive-Aggression: A Guide for the Therapist, the Patient, and the Victim (Praeger, 2002); and Treating Emotional Disorder in Gay Men (Praeger, 1999).