‘Boot?’ She was staring, brows pleated, eyeballs straining, with such distaste, not to say horror, at something so unexpected and still partly obscured by shadow, he might have been showing her his cock.
She started hurrying towards the door.
‘I found it. I put it on.’ Hobbling, stumbling after her, he was trying to exonerate himself. ‘Don’t know what got into me. I had to try it. An impulse, that’s all. Don’t you have impulses, Dot?’
‘I don’t know. I don’t think I do.’
He had reached her side after cannoning off a scarifier.
‘And now I’ve got to get rid of the thing.’
‘Oh, Basil, aren’t you absurd!’ She sounded shattered.
He had plumped down on what had been, judging by its scars, a chopping block, and was pulling at the offending boot. ‘All right, I’m the one who’s the fool!’ Panting pulling. ‘Aren’t I? So why worry?’
What if it wouldn’t come off? There was no sign of its giving; a natural deformity could not have stuck closer.
‘Dorothy — you may have to — fetch a — knife!’ The words too, were a struggle.
‘A knife? What shall I tell them?’ His sister was to that extent humourless.
She had got down on her stockinged knees, on the dust and slivers of bark, and had started wrenching at the filthy boot. ‘If we can’t, between us — we’re — not — much,’ her teeth bit the rest of it off; her long fragile nails ran skittering tearing over the surface of the mildewed leather; as the Hunter children fought for their self-justification and freedom from awfulness.
The Princesse de Lascabanes fell sideways at last, holding the boot which together they had torn from Sir Basil Hunter’s foot.
‘How could you?’ she gasped. ‘You’re such a shit, Basil!’ She was crying, or at any rate laughing, as she thumped the dirt with the boot. ‘God only knows what sort of actor you are. Oh, fuck — fuck everybody!’ she moaned in a whimpered whisper: her Australian self was tormenting Dorothy de Lascabanes.
‘Yes,’ he agreed.
He got her to her feet.
By the time they burst through the curtain of light she had calmed down.
‘We shall think of something,’ he promised, and squeezed her elbow.
Dorothy knew it was she who should think. ‘You didn’t close the door. Hadn’t you better go back and close it? On top of everything else, Macrory might object, Basil, to the door left open.’
‘Yes,’ he agreed. ‘I’ll go back and shut it.’
For the moment Dorothy knew better. He also realized he must find his other shoe, or limp across the yard in his sock, perhaps bump into their host, and stand accused.
So Sir Basil Hunter doubled back inside the shed, and the princess went on alone. It was preferable that way: those watching would be less likely to interpret conspiracy of any kind.
Anne Macrory remarked, ‘I don’t know, Dorothy, how we managed before you came.’
Dorothy bit off a thread.
Anne could not stop herself totting up the virtues. ‘And Basil — he’s such good company. Rory admires him.’
Dorothy would have re-threaded the needle if her hand had been trembling less. ‘I think all actors are pretty useless, except as actors.’ She had not met another. ‘Basil, I know from experience, feels out of his element with laymen.’ Her voice had suddenly tightened.
Anne was mystified by something. ‘What is it, dear?’
‘I pricked my finger,’ Dorothy lied.
After the customary women’s lunch they had come upstairs to what was still the sewing-room, and were renovating dresses for the girls. (‘You’re so imaginative, Dorothy, and clever. This year the poor things are going to look presentable.’) In a corner of the room Dorothy Hunter used to hate for what she was submitted to, both blandishment and slaps, Mother’s form had stood through the years, stuck with pins and several needles trailing multicoloured threads. There was the table in which Dorothy and Basil, during an armistice, had burnt their names with a poker. Over optimistically, Basil had pricked out an asymmetrical heart surrounding them.
The bare room where the women were working was kept just warm enough by a thin winter sunlight and a rather smelly kerosene stove. The horizon was so distinctly drawn, frost must have started gathering in the hollows. The night would be cold.
‘Do you actually enjoy sewing?’ Anne asked respectfully.
‘Cutting is what I like,’ Dorothy confessed.
She enjoyed hearing the crunch of the heavy, dressmaking scissors. And was an adept cutter. Though she had only recently been told. She was surprised to realize the number of ways in which she excelled since her friend pointed them out.
She frowned at the dress she was finishing off, and brought it closer than her sight required. If she could have remained enclosed by this circle of love and trust, she might have accepted herself by living up to their opinion of her. But her heart sickened on her thinking that her commitments made this impossible. As the surrounding hills shrank under the pressure of cold, and the warmth from the rusty governess-stove decreased, so the love her friends appeared to feel for her became more poignant and undeserved.
Anne Macrory and her girls were inured to cold, but Dorothy chattered and laughed while delivering a blow she had been contemplating. ‘That old dummy in the corner — is it of any use?’
Anne looked up. ‘Not really. We use it as a pincushion.’
‘I wonder you think it worth keeping. It was Mother’s form when we were children — indispensable in those days, in the dressmaking department. But by now it’s probably full of borer and dry rot — what you might call a hazard.’
‘I hadn’t thought. It’s always been there.’
Mog said, ‘We dress it up. Don’t we, Jan?’
Janet blushed along her cold, milky cheekbones. She was waiting greedily for the frock the princess (her friend!) was sewing for her.
Dorothy inclined her head above the dress. ‘You remember those figures stuck with pins? You made them out of wax, and threw them on the fire — and the person you wanted to die was supposed to.’
Anne said, ‘No, I don’t know. What sheer superstitious rubbish! Anyhow, I can’t remember ever wanting anyone to die.’
‘And did they die?’ Janet asked.
‘Apparently, if you wanted it enough.’
Mog was sticking a few additional pins into the dressmaker’s dummy. ‘Did you ever have a go with the wax?’
‘No,’ said Dorothy, looking through the window at a landscape she did not see. ‘I know somebody who went as far as making the image. Then she hadn’t the courage. I think she felt — in fact she told me that merely to conceive such an evil thought starts you withering up, and you go on — withering.’
Like flies in amber, the Macrorys hung transfixed in the light which for a moment had set solid in the quiet room; till Anne began to fidget, to glance at her watch, to twitch. ‘How morbid we’re being!’ She laughed, and looked over her shoulder at the window.
‘Here’s Janet’s dress at least.’ Dorothy shook it out for them to see; she was relieved to be making what was to some extent a positive contribution. ‘All it needs is a sash of sorts.’
‘Yes,’ said Anne. ‘Blue for Janet.’ Her own preoccupation made her vague; the vastness of the sky bewildered her.
‘But I hate blue!’ Janet blazed, crumpling the dress against her thin body. ‘You know I decided on red, Mother.’
Anne was too tired, too absent, to give the matter thought. ‘Blue is what suits you, darling. Red would look — well, eccentric.’
‘How do you know what I am? How do you know I’m not eccentric?’