She has cerebral palsy. All her performances revolve around that topic.
According to her, the term cerebral palsy can only have been invented to induce “fear and panic.” That is why she likes to be described as a “wobbly” person. She is always wobbly, always about to fall.
Francesca Martinez’s humor — like Lou Costello’s — takes its inspiration from her falls.
Cerebral palsy is her astronaut boot caught in a storm drain.
152
Francesca Martinez told the Daily Mail what had happened to her.
Her cerebral palsy, like Tito’s, was caused by a medical error. Her mother was left unattended for some hours because “being a Sunday there were fewer hospital staff on duty.” Francesca remained in the womb and was left without oxygen for seven minutes.
Cerebral palsy, she explains, “occurs when part of the brain fails to work. It affects one child in five hundred. Each case is unique, but usually people’s muscle control and mobility are affected.”
The best way to describe how cerebral palsy affects her is that she appears to be “slightly drunk.” Her speech is slurred and her balance wobbly.
153
Two weeks after learning that Tito had cerebral palsy, I wrote about it in my column in Veja:
My seven-month-old son has been diagnosed with cerebral palsy. From the outside, that piece of news might seem utterly desperate. From the inside, though, it’s different. It was as if they had told me my son was Bulgarian. If I discovered that my son was Bulgarian, the first thing I would do would be to consult a book to find out more about Bulgaria: gross national product, principal rivers, mineral wealth, etc. And that is what I did with cerebral palsy.
154
After saying that cerebral palsy was a term that struck fear into the heart and that, for the first time in my life, I belonged to a minority, I ended the column in this shamelessly sentimental way:
I consider myself to be a humorous writer. For me, there is nothing funnier than frustrated expectations.
Frustrated expectations about social progress.
Frustrated expectations about scientific discoveries.
Frustrated expectations about the power of love.
I have always worked from that anti-enlightenment viewpoint. Now I’ve changed. I now believe in the power of love. Love for a little Bulgarian.
155
From that moment on, Tito’s cerebral palsy became a recurrent theme in my columns.
Over a period of ten years, I devoted eight columns to him.
If, as Francesca Martinez estimated, cerebral palsy affects, on average, 1 child in 500, I published a column on the subject, on average, every 500 days.
Cerebral palsy affected the lives of my readers as often as it affects life in general.
156
In an article in the Daily Telegraph, Francesca Martinez stated: “That’s the huge secret about disability — anyone with experience of it knows that a disabled person is just a person they love.”
In my first article about Tito, that was the only “huge secret” I had to reveal.
Astonishingly, for me and for Anna, Tito’s cerebral palsy was never a cause for sorrow. Astonishingly, for me and for Anna, Tito’s cerebral palsy never seemed a burden.
At seven months, Tito was simply a person we loved.
157
In mid-2001, we took Tito to see a neurologist in New York.
158
159
In the previous image: Tito and me in New York.
160
In New York, I became Tito’s first mode of transport.
He would point left and I would go left. He would point right and I would go right. He would point at his grandmother and I would hand him over to his grandmother.
Just like Josef Mengele, Tito would choose my fate by sending me off to the right or to the left.
161
The New York neurologist was very encouraging.
After doing a few tests, he predicted that, in two years’ time, Tito would be speaking normally. He also predicted that, in four years’ time, Tito would be walking on his own.
Both predictions proved false.
Tito never spoke normally. He never walked on his own.
162
Christy Brown had cerebral palsy.
During the first few months of his life, his parents took him to various neurologists in Dublin.
They all said that Christy Brown would remain forever in a state of “torpor,” because he was an “idiot,” “mentally defective,” a “hopeless case” and “beyond cure.”
In his autobiography, My Left Foot, Christy Brown described how he was able to overcome the worst prognoses, finding a way of typing and painting with the big toe of his left foot.
163
Like Christy Brown’s parents, Anna and I learned to ignore all the doctors’ stupid prognoses, whether positive or negative. Like Christy Brown’s parents, Anna and I learned to celebrate each step taken by Tito, however wobbly.
After a certain point, we even learned to celebrate his falls. In the early years, Tito would always hurt himself when he fell. Over time, he developed new ways of breaking his falls.
Knowing how to fall is much more valuable than knowing how to walk.
164
The Irish band The Pogues recorded a song about Christy Brown.
In the opening chords, the electric guitar is accompanied by the sound of a typewriter, going tap-tap-tap.
165
(Picture Credit 1.12)
166
In the previous image: Christy Brown in his room, tap-tap-tapping away on his typewriter.
167
Now Tito is in his bedroom, and I’m in the library.
He is tap-tap-tapping away on his computer keyboard. I respond by tap-tap-tapping away on my computer keyboard.
I send him a PDF of a photo of Christy Brown. I then explain to him over VoIP that Christy Brown’s cerebral palsy was far worse than his, but that didn’t stop him becoming an important writer.
I also send him a file containing The Pogues’ song and translate the words, which describe how Christy Brown, the village idiot, managed to become a respected writer around the world by typing — tap-tap-tapping — with his big toe.
Tito rapidly loses interest and switches off the VoIP.
Christy Brown felt a need to overcome his cerebral palsy. Tito is perfectly happy with the way he is. He doesn’t need any good examples.
168
Christy Brown picked up a piece of chalk with the toes of his left foot and wrote the letter A. He was five years old. His parents realized that inside his paralyzed body was a normal mind, and they started stimulating him by talking to him all the time.
The New York neurologist recommended that we use the same method as Christy Brown’s parents, because Tito’s intellectual abilities were the best resource he had.