“You should’ve called me earlier.”
“I tried all afternoon, but you weren’t there.”
“That’s because the FBI was questioning me for two hours. We do share an office, y’know.”
Right there, I lose my appetite. “What’d you say to them?”
“I answered their questions. They asked me what Caroline was working on, and I told them everything I knew.”
“Did you tell them about me and Nora?”
“There’s nothing to tell,” she says with a grin. “I don’t know anything, Mr. Agent. I just remember him leaving the office.”
As I said, she’s a good friend. “Did they ask you a lot of questions about me?”
“They’re suspicious, but I don’t think they have a clue. They just told me to take the rest of the night off. Now do you want to tell me what’s really going on?”
I’m tempted, but decide against it.
“I know you’re in trouble, Michael. I can see it in your face.”
I keep my eyes focused on the Pad Thai. There’s no reason to get her involved.
“No matter what you’re thinking, you can’t do this one alone. I mean, Nora’s already hung you out to dry, hasn’t she? Nothing’s going to change that. The only question now is whether you’re going to be too stubborn to ask for help.” She reaches over and puts a hand on my shoulder. “I’d never betray your loyalty, Michael. If I wanted to see you drown, I would’ve done it already.”
“Done what?”
“Told them what I think.”
“Which is?”
“I think you and Nora ran into something you weren’t supposed to. And whatever it was, it’s got you thinking there’s more to Caroline’s heart attack than what they put in the press release.”
I don’t respond.
“You think someone killed her, don’t you?”
All I can do is stay with the Pad Thai.
“We can get out of this, Michael,” she promises. “Just tell me who it was. What’d you see? You don’t have to keep it all to yoursel-”
“Simon,” I whisper.
“What?”
“It’s Simon,” I repeat. “I know it sounds nuts, but that’s who we saw last night.” Once the gates open, it doesn’t take long for me to tell her the whole story. Losing the Secret Service. Finding the bar. Trailing Simon. Getting caught with the money. By the time I’m done, I have to admit I feel the weight lift. There’s nothing worse than being alone.
Slowly wiping her mouth with a napkin, Pam’s still processing the information. “You think he murdered her?”
“I don’t know what to think. I’ve barely had a second to catch my breath.”
She shakes her head at me. “You’re in trouble, Michael. This is Simon we’re talking about.” She says something else, but I don’t hear it. All I notice is that ‘we’ has once again become ‘me.’
My fork slips from my hand and crashes against my plate. Jolted by the noise, I’m back where I started. “So you’re not going to help?”
“N-no, of course not,” she stutters, looking down. “I’ll definitely help.”
Biting the inside of my lip, all I want to do is accept the offer. But the more I watch her pick at her food… I’m not getting her into this-especially when I’m still struggling with how to get out. “I appreciate the ear, but-”
“It’s okay, Michael, I know what I’m doing.”
“No, you-”
“I do,” she interrupts, growing more confident. “I didn’t come here to let you fly alone.” Pausing a moment, she adds, “We’ll get you out of this.”
On my face, I show her a smile, but deep down, I’m praying she’s right. “I was thinking of pulling Simon’s and Caroline’s FBI files. Maybe that’ll tell us why he-”
“Forget about their files,” she says. “I think we should go straight to the FBI and-”
“No!” I blurt, catching us both by surprise. “I’m sorry… I just… I’ve already seen the results of that one. I open my mouth and Simon opens his.”
“But if you tell them-”
“Who do you think they’re going to believe-the Counsel to the President or the young associate who got nabbed with ten grand in his glove compartment? Besides, the moment I start singing, I wreck my life. The vultures and their news vans’ll be sniffing through every piece of dirty laundry they can find.”
“You’re worried about your dad?”
“Wouldn’t you be?”
She doesn’t answer. Clearing her plate from the table, she replies, “I still don’t think you can just sit on this and hope it goes away.”
“I’m not sitting on it-I just… you should’ve heard Simon today. Quiet’s going to be what keeps me around… ” I pause as it once again knocks the wind out of me. “That’s all I have, Pam. Stay quiet and start searching. Anything else is just throwing myself to the wolves.” Letting the logic make the point, I add, “Also, let’s not forget the backdrop here: A scandal like this is a wrecking ball for the reelection. I guarantee that’s why the FBI is keeping things so hush-hush.”
Her silence lets me know I’m right. I pick up my own plate and follow her to the kitchen. Pam’s pouring half of her food into the garbage disposal. Another lost appetite.
Without turning around, Pam asks, “What about Nora?”
I take a nervous sip of water. “What about her?”
“What’s she going to do to help you? I mean, if she wasn’t such a freakshow, you wouldn’t be in this mess.”
“It’s not all her fault. Her life isn’t as easy as you think.”
“Not as easy?” Pam asks, facing me. She gives me a long, steady look, then quickly rolls her eyes. “Oh, no,” she groans. “You’re going to try and save her now, aren’t you…?”
“It’s not that I want to save her… ”
“You just have to, right? That’s the way it always is.”
“What’re you talking about?”
“I know why you do it, Michael; I even admire why you do it… but just because you couldn’t help your dad… ”
“This has nothing to do with my dad!”
She lets the outburst go, knowing it’ll calm me down. In the silence, I take a breath. Sure, I grew up being protective of my father, but that doesn’t mean I’m protective of everyone. And with Nora, it’s… it’s different.
“It’s a wonderful instinct, Michael, but this isn’t like what you did with Trey. Nora’s not going to be as easy to cover up.”
“What’re you talking about?”
“You don’t have to play dumb-Trey told me how the two of you met: about how he came into your office looking for help.”
“He didn’t need help; he just wanted some advice.”
“C’mon, now-he was caught painting devil beards and monocles on Dellinger’s campaign posters, then got arrested for destruction of property. He was terrified to bring it to his boss… ”
“He wasn’t arrested,” I clarify. “All it was was a citation. The whole thing was just harmless fun, and more important, it was on his own time-it wasn’t like he was acting for the campaign.”
“Still, when he came in, you barely knew him; he was just a face from around headquarters… which means you certainly didn’t have to call in any favors from your law school buddies at the DA’s Office.”
“I didn’t do anything illegal… ”
“I’m not saying you did, but you didn’t have to run to his rescue either.”
I shake my head. She doesn’t understand. “Pam, don’t make more of it than it is. Trey needed help, and he found me.”
“No,” she blurts, her voice rising. “He found you because he needed help.” Watching me carefully, she adds, “For better or worse, we all have our reputations here.”
“So what does that have to do with Nora?”
“Just what I said: helping Trey, and your dad, and your friends, and everyone else who needs a rescue, doesn’t mean you can pull it off with Nora. Not to mention the fact that if you’re not careful, she’ll let you take the fall alone.”
I think back to last night and the way Nora’s voice cracked as she apologized. The way she said it… her chin quivering… she’d never let me fall alone. “If she’s staying quiet now, it’s gotta be for a reason.”