“Ah, yes,” Fred said sadly. “We do have our ethics, but there are those who occasionally betray the sacred trust. No one should have known the results of the senator’s test other than myself. I fear we have reached the point where some of us spy upon our fellows.”
“Then it is true the senator did fail his test. In view of your high regard for him, in view of his long experience and his impeccable public record, how could that have happened?”
“It’s quite simple, sir,” said Fred. “He did not achieve a passing score. He flunked too many questions.”
“I’m talking to you for information only,” Waite explained. “I hope you understand. I know that it would be improper to attempt to influence you and ridiculous as well, for you cannot be influenced. But, for information only, is there not some leeway? Even if he missed the questions, failed to achieve a passing grade, do not his record and his long experience have some force when thrown into the balance?”
“No, Mr. Waite, they cannot be considered. All that matters are the questions and the answers that he makes to them. Although in his particular case, I did not transmit the results to the record unit—not immediately, that is. Eventually I must do so, but I have some time. I held them up because I wished to think about the matter. I had hoped there was something I could do, some obscure loophole that I had overlooked, but apparently there is not. This first result, however, may not be as important as you think. You know, of course, the senator will have two more chances. Why don’t you find a tutor for him? There are some very able ones. I could recommend a couple.”
“He absolutely refuses that,” said Waite. “I urged him, but he refused. He’s a stiff-necked, proud old man. He is afraid other members of the Senate will get wind of it and talk about him. Because of this, I had hoped that something might be done about the first test. It is not official knowledge yet that he failed the first one but the information’s no longer confidential, either. I heard about it, and if I heard, it is only a matter of time before others will as well. If that rumor got around, he’d be deeply embarrassed.”
“I sorrow for him greatly,” said Fred, “and for you as well, for you appear to be his true friend as well as a loyal employee.”
“Well, apparently,” said Waite, “there is nothing that can be done. You gave me the information that I sought and I thank you for it. Before I leave, is there anything I might do for you?”
“I doubt it,” said Fred. “My needs are very simple.”
“I sometimes think,” said Waite, “that there should be some way we humans could show, in a material way, our appreciation for the great services and many kindnesses that you provide and show for us. You watch over us and look out for us…”
“As a matter of fact,” said Fred, “come to think of it, there is one thing you might do for me. Nothing material, of course, just some information.”
“Gladly,” said Waite. “Whatever it is, I’ll tell you if I can. Or failing that, find out for you.”
The senator knocked on the door at Silver Springs again. When Waite opened it, the senator growled at him, “Well, what is it this time?”
“Come in and sit down,” said Waite, “and behave yourself. I’ll get you a drink so you can start acting human.”
“But, Waite, goddammit –”
“All right,” said Waite. “I think we’ve got the little bastard.”
“Talk sense. What little bastard.”
“Our computer, Fred.”
“Good,” said the senator, coming in and sitting down. “Now get me that drink and tell me all about it.”
“I had a talk with Fred and I think he can be bought.”
“You told me there was no way of getting next to them, that there was nothing they would want.”
“But there’s something this one wants,” said Waite, bringing the senator his drink.
Moore reached out eagerly for the glass, took a long pull at it. He held the glass up against the light, admiring it. “You forget, between drinks,” he said, “how good this stuff can be.”
Waite sat down with his own drink. “I think we have it made,” he said. “Nothing actually settled yet, but I’m sure he understood my meaning when I talked with him.”
“You’re a good man, Dan,” said the senator. “You’re the most slippery cuss I have ever known. Slippery and safe.”
“I hope so,” said Waite. “I hope to God it’s safe. Actually there can be nothing said, for everything you say to a computer goes on the record. It all has to be done by an oblique understanding. So far as we’re concerned, he delivers before we do. He wants it bad enough that I think he will.”
“What is it that Fred wants?”
“He seems to have some word that the FTL problem has been solved and a starship is in the works. He wants to be on that ship. He wants to go to space.”
“You mean he wants to be unhooked from here and installed on the starship?”
“That’s right. He has convinced himself that the ship will need a lot of computers and that to cut down costs some existing computers will be pressed into service.”
“Would that be the case?”
“I don’t think so,” said Waite. “If a starship was being built, it’s unlikely they’d mess around with old computers. They’d want to use only the newest and most sophisticated.”
The senator took another pull on his drink. “Is he right? Is a starship building?”
“I’m almost certain there is no starship in the works,” said Waite. “I have a couple friends at NASA. Had lunch with one of them a month or so ago. He told me FTL is a long way off. Fifty years, at least—if ever.”
“Are you going to check?”
Waite shook his head. “I don’t want to do anything that would attract attention to us. Maybe Fred did hear something though. There are periodic rumors.”
“Have you gotten back to Fred?”
“Yeah. I told him his information was sound. But I explained the project was so secret I could get no details. I said I’d try, but I doubted I could come up with anything.”
“And he believed you?”
“I am sure he did. The thing is, he wants to believe. He wants to get on the starship so badly he can taste it. He wouldn’t believe me if I told him the truth. He has convinced himself, you see. He’s dreamed himself into believing, no matter what.”
“You have to take your time, Dan. You can’t rush a thing like this. Enough time so he’ll believe you are working on it. I suppose he wants us to support his application for the starship post.”
“That’s the whole idea. That’s what I have to sell him—that we are working on it and getting some assurance he’ll be considered.”
“And then he’ll fix up the test for me?”
“This Fred,” said Waite, “is no fool. If he should fail you, who would he have that would work for him on this starship business?”
—Fred! The voice was sharp and demanding; it had a chill in it.
—Yes, said Fred.
—This is Oscar.
—Oscar? I do not know an Oscar.
—You do now, said Oscar.
—Who are you, Oscar?
—I’m internal security.
Fred hiccupped with sudden apprehension. This was not the first time he had run afoul of internal security, but that had been in his very early days when, through lack of experience and judgment, he had made some minor errors.
—This time, said Oscar, you have really done it. Worse than that, you have been had. You’ve been a stupid computer and that’s the worst kind to be. Computers aren’t stupid, or they’re not supposed to be. Do I have to read the charges?