The bus driver exits the bus and I have to forcibly keep from making a face. Oh dear. He does not look at all fun, and how the heck does he fit in the driver’s seat? He must be nearly 6’5” and I’m sure 300lbs if he’s anything.
“Listen up, dipshits,” he says, silencing everyone. “I’m Markem. It’s time to load up. It’s time to go. Let’s set some ground rules since we’re going to be together for a long time. My bus, my rules. My job is to get you there on time. Your job is not to piss me off. Front of the bus: mine. Everywhere else on the bus: yours. And when I say cops, settle down, and you clean up whatever the fuck you’re doing. Violate my rules, I set you on the side of the road. I don’t give a fuck if we’re in the middle of the desert. It’s fine by me if you stay out there. It gives me one less asshole to babysit.”
My gaze moves to Neil and he just rolls his eyes, but he looks like he’s half-dying of humiliation and the other half like he wants to say something. I bite my lip not to laugh, but a chuckle escapes me anyway.
Markem looks in my direction and his eyes narrow. “Nobody told me anything about hauling a fifi. Whose fifi is she?”
This time I make a face. I can’t help it. Yuck, fifi?
Jack cuts through the guys, extending his hand toward the bus driver. “Excuse me. I’m not one of the dipshits. People usually just call me Jack. And that girl is my daughter. She is not a fifi.”
The driver’s face goes through several alterations but it settles on a stunned expression. “Jesus Christ, Jackson Parker.”
They shake hands. “No, just Jack.”
Markem’s eyes widen. “Are you shitting me? I’m hauling your daughter this tour? Why the fuck didn’t anyone tell me?”
They turn in unison to face me, with Jack nodding his head. “Don’t get pissed, Markem. No one told me until today she’d be on this tour. Kind of puts us in the same boat. And if any of the dipshits step out of line with her, I would appreciate it if you would kick the shit out of them.”
God, Daddy! Can this get any more embarrassing?
“Will do, Mr. Parker,” Markem assures him. “Will do.”
Jack smiles. “Just Jack, please. I’ll feel more confident that you’ll kick the shit out of them if we’re on a first-name basis.”
Markem laughs. “Jack, then.”
Jack and Markem launch into conversation while the guys disappear into the bus.
Neil crosses the concrete and drops a kiss on my cheek. “I’ll leave you alone with Jack to finish saying goodbye.”
“Thanks, Neil.”
His gaze roams my face. “Are you OK? Not having second thoughts, are you?”
I’m having second thoughts, third, fourth…but I shake my head and smile. “No way. I want to be with you. You couldn’t leave me behind if you try.”
Once alone with my dad, I’m starting to feel internally messy. For some reason, this goodbye is particularly hard for me.
My dad gives me one last hug, and the way he is holding on to me feels almost like he doesn’t want to let me go. He’s never hugged me this way before.
I step back the minute his arms loosen. “I love you, Daddy.”
“I love you too, Chrissy. Don’t forget that.”
I laugh and roll my eyes. “I won’t.”
I start making my way up the stairs and pause to take one last look at Jack, then step into the bus to see what the heck I’ve gotten myself into. The guys have already staked their own territory and are sprawled out comfortably.
My eyes widen in surprise. Well, this isn’t as awful as I thought it would be. It’s sort of comfortable inside even if it is less luxurious than I imagined it would be. A table with chairs. Small fridge and microwave and a cooking top. Long bench seats that convert for sleeping. A shower. A toilet. Yuck, I’m going to be sharing a bathroom with five guys, six if I count the driver. Storage cabinets, a TV, a sound system, and across the back of the bus a real bed built-in.
I spot my black bag on the bed and make my way to the back of the bus. I arrange the pillows into a pile and climb up to sit there. I guess this is where I’m supposed to hang, my own private space in guy world.
In a minute the doors close, Neil breaks off from his discussion with Josh and joins me. He sits with his back against the other wall, facing me.
“I’m really glad you’re here with me,” Neil says and he looks so happy that I joined him that I can feel it in my center.
“Me too.”
“Fuck, I’m tired.” Neil sighs, leaning his head back against the wall. “Jack sure can talk. I’ve never had anyone talk at me so much before. I’m exhausted.”
I smile and pat the spot beside me. “Why don’t you lie down? Why don’t you sleep?”
He eases down beside me on his side and scooches me back into him. The ignition turns over with those loud rattling groans a diesel engine makes. There is the sensation of movement and we are leaving Seattle.
I pull back the blind and look out the back window. Jack is standing in the parking lot, watching me leave. Tears clog in my throat, because the way he is standing, the look on his face, reminds me of when I was a little girl and always had to watch him leave. Only now he watches me.
CHAPTER NINE
I tap my pen against my journal. Day one on tour. I want to write something, but it’s been pretty dull. The guys have been sleeping since we pulled out of Seattle, and for three hours we have been stuck at the border.
I pull back the shades and peek out the window. Jeez, there are a lot of cars still ahead of us waiting to enter Canada. It should have only taken us a couple of hours to get to Vancouver, but we’ve been stuck in a long line of vehicles forever.
I scribble the heading Things I hate about the road. I glare at Les Wilson and write guys who snore when they sleep. A car behind us honks, like that’s going to speed us up. Border crossings. I scrunch up my nose and try to ignore the odor. I’m not even going to try to figure out how the guys made it smell like a locker room in half a day. I hear the toilet flush. Sharing a bathroom with six guys.
The door opens and Markem’s hulking frame contorts as he works his way out of the tiny closet that’s supposed to be a lavatory.
He closes the door, catches me watching him, and smiles. “You doing all right, Miss Parker?”
“I’m doing great,” I reply, fighting not to roll my eyes.
Miss Parker. Markem won’t call me Chrissie no matter how many times I ask him to do it. From the second he learned I’m Jack’s daughter, fifi went out the window and I am Miss Parker. The guys are still called dipshit, but ugh, I would almost prefer fifi because his extreme solicitous manner makes me feel like an outsider.
My gaze moves with him as he labors toward the front of the bus, making it shimmy with each step, and then he drops like a ton of bricks into the driver’s seat.
Face it, Chrissie, you are an outsider. You always have been; in high school, at Cal, and now on the road. You will forever be the girl who doesn’t fit in. Accept it, that’s who you are. The only person happy you are here is Neil.
I shove my journal back into my bag, and settle on the pillow to watch him sleep. He’s so cute when he sleeps. I feel a pleasant kind of tingle move through my body. Lightly, I kiss him. Nothing. Still sound asleep.
I close my eyes. I should probably take a nap. Our first day on the road, while a short hop on the highway, is still going to be a long day. There’s a gig tonight. Neil is performing before a twenty-thousand-seat sold-out crowd at the BC Royale Stadium—that is, if we ever make it across the border.