Odeen said, “I have sometimes thought that, too.” Then he burst out, “I am proud of her for that.”
“Nothing wrong with that,” said Losten. “Why not tell her so? And if she likes to pamper the Rationalness in herself, why not let her? Teach her what you know more intensively. Answer her questions. Will it disgrace your triad to do that?”
“I don’t care if it does.... And why should it, anyway? Tritt will think it a waste of time, but I’ll handle him.”
“Explain to him that if Dua gets more out of life and a truer sense of fulfillment, she might not have the fear of passing on that she now has and might be more ready to have a baby-Emotional.”
It was as though an enormous feeling of impending disaster had been lifted from Odeen. He said, hurriedly, “You’re right. I feel you’re right. Losten-sir, you understand so much. With you leading the Hard Ones, how can we fail to continue succeeding in the other-Universe project?”
“With me?” Losten was amused. “You forget it is Estwald who is guiding us now. He is the real hero of the project. It would be nowhere without him.”
“Oh, yes,” said Odeen, momentarily discomfited. He had never yet seen Estwald. In fact, he had not yet met a Soft One who had actually met him though some reported having seen him in the distance now and then. Estwald was a new Hard One; new, at least, in the sense that when Odeen had been young, he had never heard him mentioned. Didn’t that mean that Estwald was a young Hard One, had been a child Hard One when Odeen had been a child Soft One?
But never mind that. Right now, Odeen wanted to get back home. He couldn’t touch Losten in gratitude, but he could thank him again and then hasten away joyfully.
There was a selfish component to his joy. It was not just the distant prospect of the baby-Emotional and the thought of Tritt’s pleasure. It was not even the thought of Dua’s fulfillment. What counted with him at this very moment was the immediate gleeful prospect ahead. He was going to be able to teach. No other Rational could feel the pleasure of so doing, he was sure, for no other Rational could possibly have an Emotional like Dua as part of the triad.
It would be wonderful, if only Tritt could be made to understand the necessity. He would have to talk to Tritt, somehow persuade him to be patient.
2c
Tritt had never felt less patient. He did not pretend to understand why Dua acted the way she did. He did not want to try. He did not care. He never knew why Emotionals did what they did. And Dua didn’t even act like the other Emotionals.
She never thought about the important thing. She would look at the Sun. But then she would thin out so that the light and food would just pass through her. Then she would say it was beautiful. That was not the important thing. The important thing was to eat. What was beautiful about eating? What was beautiful?
She always wanted to melt differently. Once she said, “Let’s talk first. We never talk about it. We never think about it.”
Odeen would always say, “Let her have her way about it, Tritt. It makes it better.”
Odeen was always patient. He always thought things would be better when they waited. Or else he would want to think it out.
Tritt wasn’t sure he knew what Odeen meant by “think it out.” It seemed to him it just meant that Odeen did nothing.
Like getting Dua in the first place. Odeen would still be thinking it out. Tritt went right up and asked. That was the way to be.
Now Odeen wouldn’t do anything about Dua. What about the baby-Emotional, which was what mattered? Well, Tritt would do something about it, if Odeen didn’t.
In fact, he was doing something. He was edging down the long corridor even as all this was going through his mind. He was hardly aware he had come this far. Was this “thinking it out”? Well, he would not let himself be frightened. He would not back away.
Stolidly, he looked about him. This was the way to the Hard-caverns. He knew he would be going that way with his little-left before very long. He had been shown the way by Odeen once.
He did not know what he would do when he got there this time. Still, he felt no fright at all. He wanted a baby-Emotional. It was his right to have a baby-Emotional. Nothing was more important than that. The Hard Ones would see he got one. Hadn’t they brought them Dua when he had asked?
But who would he ask? Could it be any Hard One? Dimly, he had made up his mind not any Hard One. There was the name of one he would ask for. Then he would talk to him about it.
He remembered the name. He even remembered when he had first heard the name. It was the time when the little-left had grown old enough to begin changing shape voluntarily. (What a great day! “Come, Odeen, quickly! Annis is all oval and hard. All by himself, too. Dua, look!” And they had rushed in. Annis was the only child then. They had had to wait so long for the second. So they rushed in and he was just plastered in the corner. He was curling at himself and flowing over his resting place like wet clay. Odeen had left because he was busy. But said, “Oh, he’ll do it again, Tritt.” They had watched for hours and he didn’t.)
Tritt was hurt that Odeen hadn’t waited. He would have scolded but Odeen looked so weary. There were definite wrinkles in his ovoid. And he made no effort to smooth them out.
Tritt said anxiously, “Is anything wrong, Odeen?”
“A hard day and I’m not sure I’m going to get differential equations before the next melting.” (Tritt didn’t remember the exact hard words. It was something like that Odeen always used hard words.) “Do you want to melt now?”
“Oh, no. I just saw Dua heading topside and you know how she is if we try to interrupt that. There’s no rush, really. There’s a new Hard One, too.”
“A new Hard One?” said Tritt, with distinct lack of interest. Odeen found sharp interest in associating with Hard Ones, but Tritt wished the interest didn’t exist. Odeen was more intent on what he called his education than any other Rational in the area. That was unfair. Odeen was too wrapped up in that. Dua was too wrapped up in roaming the surface alone. No one was properly interested in the triad but Tritt.
“He’s called Estwald,” said Odeen.
“Estwald?” Tritt did feel a twinge of interest. Perhaps it was because he was anxiously sensing Odeen’s feelings.
“I’ve never seen him, but they all talk about him.” Odeen’s eyes had flattened out as they usually did when he turned introspective. “He’s responsible for that new thing they’ve got.”
“What new thing?”
“The Positron Pu— You wouldn’t understand, Tritt It’s a new thing they have. It’s going to revolutionize the whole world.”
“What’s revolutionize?”
“Make everything different.”
Tritt was at once alarmed. “They mustn’t make everything different.”
“They’ll make everything better. Different isn’t always worse. Anyway, Estwald is responsible. He’s very bright. I get the feeling.”
“Then why don’t you like him?”
“I didn’t say I didn’t like him.”
“You feel as though you don’t like him.”
“Oh, nothing of the sort, Tritt. It’s just that somehow— somehow—” Odeen laughed. “I’m jealous. Hard Ones are so intelligent that a Soft One is nothing in comparison, but I got used to that, because Losten was always telling me how bright I was—for a Soft One, I suppose. But now this Estwald comes along, and even Losten seems lost in admiration, and I’m really nothing.”
Tritt bellied out his foreplane to have it just make contact with Odeen, who looked up and smiled. “But that’s just stupidity on my part. Who cares how smart a Hard One is? Not one of them has a Tritt.”