She chewed on her lower lip. No, that wasn’t entirely honest. The dissolution of her marriage wasn’t a totally barren experience. She’d walked out on her emotionally shallow husband with renewed self-esteem and a hard-won sense of purpose. Somehow, an individual had emerged from the muddle of matrimony. She was proud of that.
“Looks like some heavy thinking going on behind those pretty blue eyes,” Jake said.
Berry struggled for something to say. “This house feels like it should be filled with children.”
“I agree. It’s going to be perfect for a pack of kids and a couple floppy-eared dogs.”
Berry stared at him in confusion. He didn’t have kids, and he didn’t have a dog. What was he telling her? Had he bought the house for someone else? An investment? Was he only living here temporarily? Lord, did he have a pregnant girlfriend in Spokane?
Jake leaned against the counter. “I have a plan.”
“What sort of plan?”
“When was the last time you ate?”
Berry blinked at the change in the conversation. “I don’t remember when I ate last.”
“Did you have supper?”
Berry’d had a candy bar for supper. She’d intended to have a sandwich, but somehow she’d never gotten to it. “What’s this got to do with your plan?”
“Nothing. Everything.” Jake opened the refrigerator door. “There’s not much food in here.”
“So, I’m not the only one who forgets to eat.”
“I’ve been eating out. Mostly at my sister’s house. She’s only a few miles from here.” He put a half gallon of milk on the counter and found a box of raisin bran in the overhead cupboard. “I’ve only got breakfast food.” He located a spoon and poured her a bowl of cereal.
Berry aimlessly pushed the raisins around with her spoon. “I’m not sure I have the energy to eat this.”
Without saying a word, Jake poured some milk into the blender. He added an egg and searched through a small box sitting on the counter, finally extracting two bottles. “A little vanilla, a dash of nutmeg,” he told Berry. He whipped the mixture and poured it into a large glass. “Here. You don’t have to chew this.”
“It has a raw egg in it.”
“Eggnog usually does.”
“Hmmm.” Berry cautiously sipped at it and licked a milk mustache off with the tip of her tongue. He had a plan. Swell. Another plan. The world needed one more plan.
Jake took the empty glass and put it in the dishwasher. He slung an arm around Berry and eased her toward the stairs. “Let’s go to bed.”
“Don’t I sleep on the couch?”
“I had beds delivered today. The ladies all have their own rooms.”
“And?”
“And you sleep in my room.” He opened the door to his bedroom and motioned her in with a Sir Walter Raleigh flourish.
“Oh, no,” she groaned, “not tonight, Jake. I’m too tired.”
Jake grinned at her as he turned down the bed linens. “No. Not tonight. When I share a bed with you for the first time I want you wide awake and panting.”
Berry stood blank-faced in front of him, too tired to formulate a retort, her mind focusing on the fact that he’d said when I share a bed with you, not if. Was it that inevitable?
He draped the royal-blue silk pajama top across her shoulders, kissed her on her forehead, and left, closing the door behind him.
Berry surfaced through the drowse of sleep, stretching her legs, then her arms. She was in the biggest, most comfortable bed she’d ever slept in. “Yum,” she sighed, rolling onto her back, feeling the delicious silk pajama top slide over her breasts. This was a lovely way to awaken, she decided. Slowly and luxuriously. If only she didn’t have this peculiar feeling of being watched. The feeling crept along her neck and tingled in her scalp. She cautiously opened one eye.
“Morning.” Jake grinned down at her.
Berry pulled the covers up to her neck. “What are you doing in here?”
“I need some clothes. Want to take a shower?”
Berry looked at him suspiciously. He had a towel slung over his shoulder. “Aren’t you going to take a shower now?”
“Yup. But I’m a good guy. I’d be willing to share it with you.”
“What a pal.”
“I can do wonderful things with soapsuds.”
“I don’t think I want to hear this.”
Jake sat on the edge of the bed and ran his finger along the blue silk collar. “I like the way you feel under this material. Now I know why they make pajamas out of it. It never felt like this when it was on me.”
Berry liked it, too. It was fun to wake up feeling pampered and feminine for a change.
He ran the material between his fingers. “You would feel like this in the shower, when you got all lathered with soap.”
Holy cow. No one had ever said anything like that to her before. Not even her ex-husband. Especially not her ex-husband!
Jake’s desire was obvious in his dark eyes as his finger traced a trail over the small swell of her breast. There was something incredibly carnal about his lazy exploration of her pajama-clad body. She licked her lips in anticipation of his good-morning kiss. When it happened, it said, Good morning, good golly! His hands headed south, and Berry didn’t want him to stop. He went from Montana to Salt Lake City and paused at Phoenix. Berry really needed him to continue on to Mexico.
“Don’t stop,” she whispered.
His hands were warm on her belly, his fingertips resting on the thin elastic band at the top of her bikini panties. “Once I cross the border, there’s no going back.”
Berry exhaled. Crossing the border wouldn’t be good. Pleasurable? Yes. Smart? No. There would be no going back in more ways than one. She groaned and pushed away and straightened her nightshirt.
“I need a moment,” she said. “It’s the first time I’ve ever felt anything like this.”
“You were married for four years. Didn’t you ever make love?”
“It turned out that I gave love, and he took love, but we never made love. We went through the motions on a regular basis, but nothing ever happened for me.” She rolled her eyes. “This is so awkward.”
“I hope I never meet this guy. I don’t think I could keep from flattening his nose.”
“It wasn’t entirely his fault. I was very young. Allen and I both thought marriage could be a panacea for our own problems. Allen was very smart. He had direction to his life. He wanted to be a doctor. There I was floundering through school, changing my major every semester, barely passing half my courses-and Allen walked into my life. He was like the calm in the center of a hurricane. Cool blue eyes, perfectly combed hair, always a crease in his trousers. I think, unconsciously, we each felt incomplete. I needed order and purpose, and he was lacking emotion. I suppose we thought if we joined the two of us together we’d get a complete human being.
“Unfortunately, life doesn’t work that way. Marriage intensified our problems. The longer we were married, the less sure I became of myself, and he grew more withdrawn, less communicative. When it became clear that the marriage was a failure, Allen began looking to other women for comfort.” Berry shrugged. “Maybe cheating was a last-ditch effort for him. Maybe he was trying to convince himself that he wasn’t deficient.”
“Maybe he was a creep.”
Berry hugged her knees and laughed. “That was my original conclusion. Time and personal growth have softened the edges of my animosity.”
Someone obtrusively clumped down the hall, stopping short of Jake’s bedroom door. “Anyone wanting to use the bathroom should do it now,” Mrs. Fitz hissed in a loud whisper. “They should get into the bathroom before Mrs. Dugan gets up!”