As I lay there, I stared at the ceiling. My eyes traced every crack and watermark above. It was something I did over the past few months when I couldn't sleep. I tried to forget about my nightmare and about Jake, but then my thoughts drifted to Lexi and her family and then finally how things felt between Reed and me last night. Did I make a mistake in grabbing his hand? Was it too much? It was just a small gesture meant to give him comfort, but there was no doubt I had felt the connection between us. Deep down, I knew whatever I was feeling was wrong. It wasn’t the right time for me to start having feelings like that for someone and especially not for someone like Reed. His life was complicated and way too public.
I knew I was already in too deep to totally back out now. Lexi had told me things that she hadn’t told anyone before. She trusted me.
My mind drifted back to the things I read in the New York Times. I squeezed my eyes shut, knowing it was a mistake to look up their story and an even bigger one to sit there and read about it for over an hour. However, once I got started, I couldn't stop. The stories on the Internet weren't nearly as descriptive as the story that Lexi told me, but the newspapers did speak more about the attackers, something Lexi had failed to mention.
According to the investigators, the attack on the Alexander family wasn't random, but they weren't targeted for any personal reason. They had been chosen because of their success and wealth. The investigators ruled that the motive was robbery and nothing more. If the Alexanders had just returned home a few minutes later, Lexi's parents would probably be alive and Lexi wouldn't have had the scars on her body, or the scars that lay beneath her skin's surface.
There were three attackers, and all of them were career criminals, but in all of their past robberies, they had never committed murder. The detectives believed that was even more reason to deem that the Alexanders just came home a few minutes too soon. After a two-week manhunt, the three men were finally found and arrested.
It made my stomach turn trying to imagine what Lexi had gone through those first couple weeks, knowing the men who killed her parents, and tried to kill her, were still out there.
According to the papers, there were three trials, one for each of the perpetrators. It was reported that the trials were long, graphic, and pure torture for Reed and Lexi, but the both of them sat through all of them, determined to see justice for their parents. All three men were convicted and were now serving life sentences with no chance to see freedom ever again.
After tossing and turning for the rest of the morning, I knew there was no way in hell I was going back to sleep. I got ready for work, eager to get to the office, more determined than ever to make this event amazing for Lexi, and for Reed. I wanted everything to be perfect. I wanted it to be beautiful.
"GOOD MORNING… er, maybe not," Isabel said after taking one look at me when I walked into the office. "Are you okay? You don't look so good."
I was hoping my concealer would cover the black circles and puffiness beneath my eyes, but I guessed I’d failed. Last night, I had cried more than I had in very long time, maybe ever. I supposed it was years and years of buildup, with the things that Lexi had told me finally being the last straw.
"I'm fine," I replied, giving her my best smile.
On the way back to my office, I tried to force my eyes open a little wider.
"What happened to you? You look like crap," Christine greeted me, assessing me from top to bottom as I walked toward my desk.
I expected nothing less from her.
Not feeling like dealing with her this morning, I ignored her and shoved my purse in the top drawer before falling down into my chair.
"Well, good morning to you, too. By the way, Sharon wants us in the conference room in ten. She'll be gone after lunch and she's ready to get this event going ASAP. There's a ton of work to be done and we're already behind. Here." She stood up and held out a piece of paper. "I've already started making a list of things we have to do, and I separated them by day. You should read over it and see if there's anything you’d like to add, but I think I've covered all the bases." She paused, waiting for a reply. My brain wasn't ready to function on full speed quite yet. I needed coffee and lots of it.
"If you're not up to doing this, just tell Sharon. I'm sure she'll let me handle the event by myself. I'm more than capable." Her voice was condescending.
Slowly, bringing my eyes up to meet hers, I gave her my best go-to-hell look. "I'm doing this event. I'll look over the list and add things if I see anything is missing," I snapped.
She huffed and rolled her eyes. Without another word, she sat back down and faced her computer. It wasn't my normal behavior to snap at someone, but with my lack of sleep, the nightmares and all the things I’d read about last night, I knew my nerves would be easily triggered. One thing was for sure; I was doing this event no matter what. I had to.
On the way to the meeting, I poured myself a large cup of coffee. The last thing I wanted to do was go in there not fully alert. Sharon had trusted me enough to give me this event and I didn't want to disappoint her. Most of all, I didn't want to disappoint Lexi or Reed.
By the end of the meeting, I was completely overwhelmed. Actually, that's an understatement. We had so much to do in such a little amount of time that I wasn't sure how we would get it all done. Sharon and Christine seemed calm, cool, and collected, so I tried my hardest to be that way as well.
The list that Christine had created had covered mostly everything, and Sharon split the responsibilities in half. Even then, I was still in way over my head. I tried not to let Sharon, and especially Christine, see how overwhelmed I was. I mean, Christine could probably complete everything on this list and have the event go off without a hitch, no problem. But me? I wasn't so sure.
So the moment the meeting ended, I spent the rest of the day on the Internet and the phone, trying to find out what venue locations were still available since the event was only a month away. An event like this would normally take months to plan, but Reed told Sharon that the date he and Lexi picked was a special one, and Sharon promised him that we would get it done.
Toward the end of the day, I had marked through most of the venues on my list as not available. So far, things were not looking good. Two venues were still available, one of which I think Lexi would love—the New York Botanical Gardens.
When I told Christine it was still available, she started to name off ideas left and right. They all sounded amazing, making me start to dislike her a little less. I knew no matter how much the two of us didn't get along, she wanted this to be just as beautiful as I did.
A little after seven p.m., I was almost ready to call it a day. There were just a few more things I wanted to check off my list before I left. I wasn't the only one working late either. Isabel and Christine were there, too. We were all going to have to pull together if we were going to get this event finished in time. Even though I was excited to be working on it, I was looking forward to getting off work, going home, and heading straight to bed.
Tomorrow I would be more rested and ready to go full speed. For the past few hours, I’d started to feel my eyes getting heavier by the second. It wasn't until Reed walked through the front door that they shot wide open.