“And if I don’t go along?”
“That would be regrettable. My Assassin, it seems, has developed an affection for you. For the greater good of Venda, he’d overlook the new arrangement, but unless he perceives it to be your decision, I’m afraid he could become a problem. I would hate to lose him.”
“You’d kill Kaden?”
“A measure of passion at last,” he said, grinning, and then his eyes went dead. “Yes. As he would me if I did something so stupid as to hinder the greater good. It is our way.”
“You mean your way.”
He sighed. “If that’s not enough to convince you, I think I’ve glimpsed some lingering fondness in your eyes for the emissary. I’d hate to break my promise giving him a month for his prince to send a messenger. It would be unfortunate if he began losing fingers prematurely. I’m finding him useful, and I have to admit a certain admiration for his unabashed ambition, but he’d be expendable too, at least pieces of him would be, unless your performance rises to stellar proportions. It’s much more efficient to prevent problems than clean them up.” He stood and his hands slid up my arms. “Convince them. Convince me.”
I opened my mouth to speak, but his finger jumped to my lips to silence me. “Shh.” His eyes grew dusky. He pulled me close, his lips searing fire against mine, though he barely grazed them as he whispered, “Think, Princess. Choose your next words very carefully. You know I’m true to my word. Think about how you want to proceed from this moment on.”
My mind burned with the choice. He had played the winning card on my first day here. “There’s always more to take, isn’t there, sher Komizar?”
“Always, my pet.”
I closed my eyes.
Sometimes we’re all pushed to do things we thought we could never do. It wasn’t just gifts that came with great sacrifice. Sometimes love did too.
Convince him. I relaxed against his touch and didn’t turn away when his mouth met mine.
CHAPTER THIRTY-NINE
I sat at the head of the table next to the Komizar. Several of the governors whispered among themselves. They had noticed my new position but said nothing openly. When he walked in with Calantha, Rafe noticed too, pausing for an extra beat as he pulled out his chair. The hall was full tonight, not just the usual Council and soldiers, but elders of the clans too. The Meurasi outnumbered them all, sitting at extra tables that had been brought in. I saw Effiera among them watching me. She tilted her head approvingly at my purple dress of scraps. There were also the quarterlords—the ones I had seen leaving the hidden chamber. Their glances cut not with approval but with stinging victory.
I looked away from Rafe, whose gaze still rested on me. Don’t make a mistake, Lia, not like— I saw my brother’s sightless eyes, the scattered pieces of body in the valley floor, the head of the butcher rolling to the ground. What had made me think I could ever outmaneuver someone like the Komizar? My head still spun with this turn I hadn’t seen coming.
While the Komizar was occupied with the chievdar to his left, I asked Calantha if she would deliver the acknowledgment of sacrifice tonight. My tongue felt like sand. My head throbbed. I wasn’t even sure I could conjure the words from my memory.
“No. It’s left to you, Princess,” she said. “You will do this.”
There was a strange urgency in her tone that made me stop and look more closely at her face. Her pale eye glistened, pinning me to my chair. Insistent.
The platter of bones was set in front of me, and I simply stared at it.
The room grew quiet, hungry, waiting. The Komizar kicked my foot beneath the table.
I stood and lifted the plate of bones and said the blessing in two languages as Kaden had done for me.
E cristav unter quiannad.
A sacrifice ever remembered.
Meunter ijotande.
Never forgotten.
Yaveen hal an ziadre.
Another day we live.
I paused, the platter trembling in my hands. There was stirring, waiting for me to finish, but I added more.
E cristav ba ena. Mias ba ena.
A sacrifice for you. Only for you.
And so shall it be,
For evermore.
Paviamma.
A rumble of paviammas returned to me.
The hunger of the Council and guests quickly overtook any notice of the added words, but I knew Rafe had noted it. He was the last to echo back paviamma to me as he looked down at the table.
The meal seemed to rush past. I had hardly taken a bite when the Komizar pushed back his seat, satisfied. “I have some news to share with you, Emissary.”
The clatter of the meal stopped. Everyone wanted to hear the news. My stomach churned with the small morsel I had eaten. But it wasn’t the news any of us expected.
“Riders from Dalbreck arrived today,” he announced.
“So soon?” Rafe asked, casually wiping grease from the corner of his mouth.
“Not the riders I sent. These were Rahtan who had already been in Dalbreck.”
Rahtan with news. My hand slid to my side, inching down for Natiya’s knife in my boot before I remembered it was gone. I eyed the dagger sheathed at Calantha’s side.
“It seems there may be some truth in your story. They brought news of the queen’s death of a widespread fever, and the king hasn’t been seen in weeks, either in mourning or on his deathbed as well. I’ll assume the latter until I hear more.”
I sat back and stared at Rafe. The queen. His mother.
He blinked. His lips half parted.
“You look surprised,” the Komizar said.
Rafe finally found his voice. “Are you sure? The queen was in good health when I left.”
“You know how those scourges are. They ravage some more quickly than others. But my riders witnessed a rather impressive funeral pyre. Those royals are quite extravagant about such things.”
Rafe nodded absently, silent for another long while. “Yes … I know.”
The pain of my utter helplessness surged through me. I couldn’t go to him, couldn’t hold him in my arms, couldn’t even offer him the simplest words of comfort.
The Komizar leaned forward, apparently noting Rafe’s reaction. “You cared for the queen?”
Rafe looked at him, his eyes as fragile as glass. “She was a quiet woman,” he answered. “Not like—” His chest rose deeply, and he took a drink of his ale.
“Not like that dried-up bastard she’s saddled with? Those are the toughest ones to kill.”
I watched the steel return to Rafe’s eyes. “Yes,” he said, a frightening smile on his lips, “but even the tough ones die eventually.”
“Let’s hope sooner rather than later, so your prince and I can strike our deal.”
“It won’t be long,” Rafe assured him. “You can count on that. The prince may even help matters along if he has to.”
“A ruthless son?” the Komizar said, his words dripping with admiration.
“A determined one.”
The Komizar nodded his approval of the prince’s pending patricide, then added, “For your sake, I hope very determined. The days do tick by, and my distaste for royal schemes hasn’t diminished. I graciously host his emissary, but not without a price that must be paid. One way or another.”