Rosencrantz nodded, staring at the Lord of the Abyss in terror.
“You have done me good, Rosencrantz. I will not forget.” Suddenly the head glopped back down into the lava and Rosencrantz’s arms could move, free once more. The demon sighed and tilted his head back. He needed to get out of here. This place was no longer that relaxing.
“So, this is the Abyss?” Damien asked Antefalken rather nervously as he and Vaselle walked down one of the rather poorly lit corridors of Mount Doom. They had just left the Temple of Doom, as Tom called it for some reason: the chamber that the D’Orcs used for much of their interdimensional communication.
“Well, it is Mount Doom, which is in the Abyss,” Antefalken said. “It’s actually a very pleasant place compared to most of the Abyss.”
“Really?” Vaselle asked rather nervously, looking around.
“It’s a lot cooler and significantly more humid,” Antefalken noted. “Tom has cooled the majority of the Doomplex, as we’ve started calling it, down to the equivalent of a very hot summer day, so that your amulets won’t be taxed as much.”
Antefalken gestured around them. “And, as you can tell by the fact that there are furnishings that somehow survived four thousand years of very dry and excessive heat, the acidity level is not toxic.” Antefalken grinned. “That is considered a major selling point.”
“So how hot is it normally?” Vaselle asked. “I hear that water boils here.”
“That is true on the plains. We are at a higher altitude here and so when the volcano was dormant, the temperature was probably only about three-fourths the temperature of boiling water.”
“So the volcano starting made it hotter?” Damien asked.
“I guess. For a while, we didn’t really notice, since it did not get any hotter than the rest of the Abyss. However, once the storm clouds formed and it started raining, the temperature quickly cooled. And then Tom started the cooling runes.”
“Cooling runes — you’ve mentioned those before,” Damien said.
“Yes, there are runes throughout this complex that do a wide variety of things; some of them are cooling runes that basically produce a cooling spell upon the air. They are actually very popular in the Courts of Chaos,” Antefalken said.
“Why do they want cooling at the Courts if they are all demons?” Vaselle asked.
“Because they have furniture, paper, clothing and food and drink that doesn’t fare well at the ambient temperature. Therefore, the higher-ups tend to use various forms of arcane cooling in their homes and palaces.”
“Is that why most demons are naked? Because clothes wouldn’t hold up well in the Abyss?” Vaselle asked.
Antefalken shrugged. “Well, it’s more like most don’t care about nudity, and don’t bother acquiring clothes. Particularly since tailoring them to fit an odd shape gets expensive for most demons, and then, as you say, the temperature would not be good for many materials over time. If they have the money, most prefer to spend it on something else.”
“But you wear clothes,” Vaselle pointed out.
“Yes, but I’m a professional entertainer; I need to wear clothes or all the women in my audience would swoon!” Antefalken grinned.
“I thought you said demons don’t care about nudity?” Damien asked his bard snidely.
“Well, generally speaking, but when one has a particularly outstanding physique...” Antefalken said.
“So you have to spend quite a bit of money on clothing?” Vaselle asked.
Antefalken looked at the wizard, slightly perplexed by the question. “Well, something like that. I didn’t always wear clothes.”
“You know it’s very odd, now that I think of it. You wear the exact same clothes probably ninety percent of the time and yet they are always impeccably clean and pressed,” Damien said, furrowing his brow.
Antefalken coughed. “As I said, I’m a professional; I need to look my best at all times. It is also about branding; people need to be able to recognize you. Ask any celebrity!”
“So are you taking us on a tour?” Vaselle asked.
“We will be doing a tour, but I’m showing you to what I’m calling the mortal suite.” Antefalken said.
“The mortal suite?” Damien repeated dubiously.
Antefalken grinned at the wizard. “It’s a suite of rooms overlooking the volcano and stadium, with a balcony. There are quite a few suites like that, but this one was apparently designed with mortal guests in mind as opposed to immortal guests.”
“And what are the differences?” Vaselle asked.
“Well, the number one difference is a room for number one and number two.” Antefalken smiled brightly at the humans, who did not seem to get the reference. He sighed. “A toilet. Bathrooms with toilets and running water. Running water now, I should say. The water did not work after the reservoirs went dry, but they work now.” He waved his hands reassuringly. “Also, the beds and furniture are more human sized, although this varies, as demons come in extremely different sizes. And the rooms have much finer temperature controls. You won’t need your amulets in them.”
Antefalken opened the double doors to a large suite with very nice furniture and some rather odd paintings of demons and other creatures. There were six doors to other rooms, plus French doors leading out to a balcony. The lighting in this room was considerably better, with multiple lamps lit throughout the room.
“Seems like a lot of rooms for two people,” Damien observed.
“Well, on that matter,” Antefalken began, “we have some other mortal guests coming. Tal Gor, Ragala-nargoloth, Beya Fei Geist and Farsooth Gore Tusk. Unfortunately, Trig Bioblast had watch and so was unable to come.”
“Those are very odd names,” Vaselle stated suspiciously.
“Well, they are orcs,” Antefalken admitted.
“Orcs?” Damien asked, surprised.
“Tom is being sworn in as king of the D’Orcs, which are based on orcs. These four, or rather five with Trig, are his shamans. Tal Gor is from Astlan, down near Jotungard and Murgandy.”
“So I take it they had longstanding ties to Mount Doom?” Damien asked.
Antefalken shook his head. “Not at all. Tom had to seek them out to get supplies for this party. Not a lot of stores or merchants nearby.”
“Welcome, Beya!” Tom greeted the final shaman as she came through the portal.
“Lord Tommus, it is my honor to be at this glorious occasion!” She bowed her head.
“We have a suite of rooms for our mortal guests; each of you will have your own room off a common living area. We think we’ve got everything covered, including water and reliable cooling,” Tom said as he closed the portal. “There is a balcony that will provide a great view of the ceremony; however, you are also welcome to attend on the main floor of the arena. It will be a very long ceremony, as I have mentioned, so come and go as you please. I, of course, will be busy most of the time, but I will have someone available to assist all of you.”
“You are most gracious, My Lord.” Beya nodded again.
“I shall take you to the suites. My demon bard, Antefalken, will be giving a tour prior to the ceremony,” Tom told her as they walked along. “The others are already there.”
“Antefalken?” Beya said.
“Yes, have you heard of him?” Tom asked.
“There is a famous orc bard from about three hundred years ago by the same very unusual name,” Beya said thoughtfully.
“Well, given all the demons I’ve been uncovering pretending to be mortals lately, I suppose it could be the same. However, my Antefalken doesn’t look anything like an orc. He’s way too small, and as far as I know, he can’t shape-change.”
“Ahh, speaking of that. It would be good if we could speak at some point regarding your son and his friend, Fer-Rog,” Beya said.