The Church of Tiernon[6]
Chapter 81
Not-Edwyrd changed into Tom as he closed the gateway above him. The human form he had been using had no wings and he was hurtling toward the ground like a rock from this high altitude. Assuming his true form (it still gave him twinges to think of it as such), he swooped down to make sure that someone had caught Talarius in his free fall.
Fortunately, Tizzy had the knight securely in all four of his hands. Clearly, there were times when it would be convenient to be an octopod like Tizzy. Talarius had put his helmet back on; probably a good idea, as the magical suit of armor apparently acted as some sort of environmental, or space suit. The knight had said it kept him safe from all hostile environments. Tom was not sure about vacuum, but fortunately one only had to worry about an air temperature near the boiling point of water, acid-like mist and spontaneously exploding giant balls of fire. Well, that and a rather extreme lack of humidity, if what the two humans he had talked to about it with were correct.
Tizzy brought the knight down onto a plateau jutting out from the side of one of the rather gravitationally impossible cylindrical stone pillars that rose a mile or more out of a seemingly barren plane. Tom really had to wonder who designed this place. Obviously it was some really demented science fiction writer or something.
The plateau was about twenty feet in diameter, just sufficiently big that they could all land on it: Tizzy with Talarius, Rupert, Tom and Antefalken the bard. Tom looked over at the bard, who was putting his harp away; he had been using it to bat away arrows when they had been banished from the city.
“How do you keep the wood from drying out?” Tom suddenly asked. “I’d think this place would literally be Hell on it.” Immediately, he bit his tongue. What exactly was it he had told Antefalken? Was he showing ignorance? Crap, these lies just kept piling up and now, he was so exhausted he couldn’t keep up with them.
The bard smiled mischievously. “It’s Denubian wyrmwood. It is quite at home in this environment. Takes a bit of Denubian worm slime now and then, but that’s it,” the demon said, either not noticing or purposefully ignoring the slip.
“Same place as the Choco-Coffee?” Rupert asked.
Antefalken shook his head. “You forgot the TM. Denubian Choco-CoffeeTM,” Antefalken corrected. “The Denubians get very picky about their trademarks.”
“Sorry,” Rupert said.
“No problem, it’s no biggie out here, but if you were in the city and one of their lawyers heard you...” Antefalken shook his head. “I think the Denubians must somehow be related to the Oorstemothians. They have similar perspectives when it comes to the law.” Antefalken stroked his beard in thought. “Although, come to think of it, most Denubians I’ve met have more than one mouth — so I’m sure they’re even better at double speak and triple speak than the Oorstemothians.” He frowned, thinking about it, and then grinned and winked at Rupert.
Talarius was swiveling his head, and thus his helmet, back and forth between the two demons, trying to follow their absurd conversation. Tom smiled; he was sure the knight didn’t expect demons to talk like normal people.
“How long are you planning on holding me hostage here?” the knight suddenly demanded.
“Until Fierd sets in the sky,” Tizzy replied.
“At the end of the day then? That soon?”
Antefalken grinned broadly at Tizzy and Rupert.
The knight made a gesture of frustration. “And when is that?”
Antefalken shook his head in mild surprise and looked at the knight. “It doesn’t; there is no Fierd here, so it never sets in the Abyss. I would have thought you knew that.”
The knight groaned. “You seriously can’t expect to keep me here forever!”
“Why not?” Tizzy asked, turning to more directly face the knight.
The knight simply stared at him. “Why would you? Either you will ransom me, or you will kill me.”
Tizzy shook his head as if not understanding. “Why couldn’t we just keep you here and torture you for eternity? It is kind of what we demons do, you know.”
The knight shuddered slightly, but had nothing to say.
“That is what you believe, isn’t it?” Tom asked the knight.
The knight turned and sighed. “Yes, it is. Get on with it then.”
“You really are as nutty as a wizard,” Tom told him. “We are not going to torture you.”
“We aren’t?” Tizzy whined loudly. “But Tooohhhmmm!” The shrill demon started pouting.
Tom shook his head with a big grin on his face, but seeing the knight blanch under his helmet, he stopped grinning. To be fair, he was not completely sure Tizzy was joking. “No, I’m sorry Tizzy; we’ve just brought Talarius here so he could find out what the Abyss is really like. What demons are really like.”
“Like a field trip!” Rupert exclaimed.
“Exactly.” Tom gave the boy a pat on the shoulder.
“Okay, I’ve seen it.” The knight gestured around. “It’s a lovely place. Can I go now?”
“Hah, hah,” Antefalken said. “You aren’t getting off that easy. It is a big plane with lots of places to go and you haven’t seen anything yet. Wait until you see the salt mines!”
“So, back to my original question. How long, demon?” The knight was getting rather imperious again.
“As long as it takes; maybe two or three centuries, maybe a thousand years or more,” Tom snapped.
The knight dropped his hands at that. “Well, the joke is on you then. I’m a human; I won’t live that long.”
Tizzy laughed hilariously, and the knight turned to glare at him. “Joke’s on you, lad. Humans don’t age or die here, not if they are kept at a reasonable temperature and in a less toxic region where their flesh won’t dissolve, or unless they get evaporated by a really big demon or similar, but that’s a risk we all take. That’s how we can torture them for so long. They regenerate, just like demons!”
The knight blanched within his helmet.
“Actually, Sir Talarius,” Antefalken said to the knight, “Given that you are here — and you have to obey the same rules as us — to all intents and purposes, you are a demon now.”
The knight stared at the bard. And stared. And then stared some more. He finally shook his head. “Your lies are pathetic.”
“Well, I don’t know,” Tom said. “Most humans would expire and decay in this environment, which is how they would die here, but your armor keeps you alive and fairly invulnerable. I am thinking Antefalken is correct.”
“Well then, I’ll just take my armor off,” the knight stated.
“You can try, but you won’t,” Antefalken told him.
“You don’t think I can stand the pain?” the knight sneered at him.
“No, I think you could; but if you do that then you abandon hope.”
“What need have I of hope? I am cursed in this wretched place.”
“I don’t know, but what does your god tell you? If you die here, your soul ends here, and you will never join those you love in the afterlife with Tiernon. On the other hand, if you keep your armor on, stay alive, you will always have the hope of returning to Astlan to die there and ascend to the heaven you have been promised. Correct?” Antefalken asked the knight.
The knight stared at the small demon. He was silent for a long time. “You know, I think you are the most devious of all these demons.” He gestured to the others.
“Why, thank you!” The bard took a bow.
Chapter 82
Damien came to their doors and gathered Jenn, Gastropé and Maelen. “I have to show the council something that I think you are going to want to see.” The wizard was looking visibly shaken.
The Church of Tiernon is the official representative organization of the Etonian god Tiernon. It is based in Justicia in New Eton. The church's highest authority is the high pontificate, who resides at the Supreme Temple in Justicia. The current high pontificate is Thaddeus Barolos. The high pontificate is assisted by High Chamberlain Mericas and both his own and the high chamberlain’s staff of functionaries.
The arch-diocese is the council of eight arch-diocates, each of whom are designated with full responsibility for a region of Astlan. They are the church's highest authority in their domain. The arch-diocese is also the body from which a new high pontificate is selected upon the death of the previous high pontificate.
In addition to the formal priesthood, the Church of Tiernon has three other organizations:
The Brothers of Tiernon are monks who provide administrative and personal services to the priesthood. They also operate monasteries that provide instruction and training both to other clerics and to worshipers. These monasteries also provide hostel services to clerics of Tiernon in their travels, and produce goods and services for use within the church.
The Sisters of Tiernon are nuns who specialize primarily in education, particularly that of children, healing, counseling and shelter for worshipers, as well as providing crafts and services for the church.
The Rod of Tiernon is probably the best-known organ of Tiernon in Astlan outside of the priesthood. In some regions, it is more well known, and often confused with, the priesthood. The Rod is the military arm of the church and is responsible for the safety and security of all church members and property. They are also the front line in exploration and conversion for the church. The often work closely with the Rangers of Torean and the Seafarers of Namora to expand the reach of all Etonian religions.
Below is a table listing the major ranks within the Church of Tiernon and the names, domains and seats of power for the senior members of the religion.
