"So you think I'm just dreaming?" Rowan said. "That we can never find Earth?"
"I think it's great that you want to fight for this cause," he said. "I admire you for that. But it's not my cause. Not my dream."
"But you're human!" She grabbed him. "Earth is our homeworld! It's a homeworld to every human. Earth is our heritage, Bay. Yours too. All of Earth's children are my brothers and sisters. They are lost, but I will guide them home. Wherever a human is in danger, I—"
"Yes, I know the vows," Bay said. "I grew up hearing the Inheritor words. But I have to leave." He stared away, blinking rapidly, then back at her. "Rowan, you can come with me. We can find a peaceful world. A world with grass and blue sky. I promise I can find you such a world. You can still come with me. Like we originally planned."
She was crying now. Her body shook. "I can't," she whispered. "I spoke the vow. I swore to fight for Earth. I can't come with you. Please, Bay. Please come with me, with your dad, please join the rest of us. We need you with us. I need you."
"I can't," he said, voice choked.
Rowan could barely see through her tears. "Then to hell with you, Bay Ben-Ari."
She spun on her heel and marched off his starship.
She ran back toward the Cagayan de Oro, curled up in the corner, and clutched the Earthstone.
"Someday we will see her," she whispered. "The pale blue marble, rising from night beyond the moon. I hope you find your way home, Bay Ben-Ari. May all of Earth's children come home."
* * * * *
Bay stood for a moment at the hatch, watching Rowan storm toward the Cagayan de Oro and vanish inside.
He wanted to chase her. To convince her to fly with him. Maybe even to join her.
He didn't want to let her go.
Finally Bay turned away.
We have different paths.
He thought of how Rowan had begun to smile freely around him, not hurrying to hide her teeth. How she never stared at his bad hand. How they had lain together in the ducts, watching movies, and how her eyes had shone.
But he also thought of Seohyun. Of days walking with her under the sun, holding her hand. How her hands had reached out to him from the fire.
I can't love anyone else. I can't bear to lose anyone again.
He settled down at the helm and switched Brooklyn back on. "Come on, Brook. Let's fly out."
Her voice was soft. "Have you said goodbye to your dad?"
Bay felt a lump in his throat. "We've never been good at goodbyes. But we've made peace."
He started her engine. It purred, and he spun Brooklyn toward the hangar's force field. Space spread out before them.
He paused, gazing at those stars, hesitating.
Brooklyn was quiet for a long moment. "Rowan is right, you know. About you. You shouldn't be alone."
Bay frowned. "Hey, you were in sleep mode when she said those things."
The starship gave a little jolt as if shrugging her wings. "I can hear you when I'm in sleep mode, you know."
"What?" Bay frowned. "Since when?"
"Since always! By the way, you sing beautifully when you're in the shower."
He gasped. "You could hear that?"
The starship bobbed her camera. "Sadly. Really, dude? The song from Frozen?"
He slapped his forehead. "I can't believe what I'm hearing."
"That's what I say! Every time you sing."
"I'm never having a shower again," he said.
"Thank Ra I don't have nostrils," Brooklyn said. Then her voice softened. "Would you like me to fly us out, Bay?"
"I'll do it." He grabbed the joystick and began directing them toward the exit.
I have a different path.
He tightened his lips.
This is not my war.
He shut his eyes.
Fly.
They exited the hangar. They flew out into space. They left Paradise Lost behind.
Bay looked back only once. The space station hung there, hovering between Terminus Wormhole and planet Akraba. Its thousands of neon signs shone, inviting travelers to grog, gamble, get high, and grab gynoids. A place of sin. Of forgetfulness.
A place where he had met Rowan.
Where they had lain in the ducts, watching The Lord of the Rings.
Where he had made peace with his father.
He looked away. He tightened his lips and flew onward, chest tight and eyes stinging.
CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO
For the first time in years, Belowgen returned home.
He flew the shuttle out from Paradise Lost, the space station he had been running for years. He sailed past Terminus Wormhole, the last wormhole in Concord territory, marking the border with the Hierarchy. He turned his shuttle, heading down toward the swampy planet below. His homeworld. Planet of the marshcrabs. Akraba.
He shuddered, legs clattering.
Belowgen had been born on that marshy world, the runt of his brood. His legs were too short, his mandibles too small, and the females scorned him, refused to let him fertilize their eggs. He had left Akraba in shame, found work on Paradise Lost. For long years, he had toiled as a janitor, mopping toilets and laundering brothel sheets, finally working his way up to Head Administrator.
I always thought I would return home wealthy and powerful, he thought. Not like this. Not with humans infesting my space station.
Akraba hovered before him, growing to fill his field of vision. Swamps covered the planet. Here was a world of twisting trees, blankets of fog, grassy tussocks, pits of mud, and buzzing insects. A world of rich aromas: moss, fungi, and rotting carcasses. A world of heat, dampness, and eggs. A world of old pain.
Belowgen landed on a muddy hill, lowered the hatch, and emerged from his starship.
The air washed across him, as hot and thick as chowder. Mist caressed his shell. Belowgen paused and inhaled, savoring it. So many smells! The moss. The mud. The water, rich with leeches. The insects that fluttered, bellies full of blood. The dead animals rotting in the mud. Somewhere in the distance—a female gravid with eggs, ready to lay them into the rot. A symphony of smells!
Trees rose across the swamplands, their roots not buried underground but rising high above the mud, tall and thin like Belowgen's legs. Indeed, marshcrabs legs had evolved to blend among these roots. Coated with mud and leaves, a marshcrab looked like yet another swamp tree. This was Belowgen's home. The place where a marshcrab belonged.
For a moment, Belowgen could only stand still, overwhelmed, letting this world heal all his stress.
He reached into the mud and pulled out a rotting dead fish. Not a mere water nymph like he bought in Paradise Lost. An actual carcass, muddy and filled with worms. He feasted. The juices flowed down his throat, and he shuddered with delight.
I missed this place, he thought. I fit here.
But he had not come here to reminisce. He had come here on a mission. To save his space station. To save this planet. Indeed, to save the galaxy.
Belowgen walked through the swamp. His claws sank into the mud. The fog rolled and insects chirped. An oily black bird cawed, circling above.
He looked around him. Several females stood between the roots of trees, their legs like more roots, their shells caked with mud and leaves. They were so well camouflaged Belowgen would normally not see them, but today they were in heat, releasing an intoxicating miasma, summoning worthy males. Even through the rich swampy aroma, Belowgen could smell the eggs lying in the mud beneath them, waiting for a male to fertilize them. Yet when they saw Belowgen walk by, the females huddled lower over their eggs and glared at him.