"Then we're filthy and corrupt," I raged. "Just to get his support for your political ambitions, you're willing to bribe a man like Dyan by putting him in charge of half‑grown
boys?"
My father's quick rage flared. It had never been turned full on me before. "Do you honestly believe it's my personal ambition I'm furthering? I ask you, which is more important‑ the personal ethics of the cadet‑master or the future of Darkover and the very survival of the Comyn? No, damn it, you sit there and listen to me! When we need Dyan's support so badly ha Council do you think. I'd. quarrel with him over his private behavior?"
I flung back, equally furious, "I wouldn't give a damn if it was his private behavior! But if there's another scandal in the Guards, dont you think the Comyn will suffer? I didn't ask to command the Guards. I told you I'd rather not. But you wouldn't listen to my refusal and now you refuse to listen to my best judgment! I tell you, I won't have Dyaa as cadet‑master! Not if I'm in command!"
"Oh, yes you will," said my father in a low and vicious voice. "Do you think I am going to let you defy me?"
"Then, damn it, Father, get someone else to command the
Guards! Offer Dyan the command‑wouldn't that satisfy bis ambition?"
"But it wouldn't satisfy me," he said harshly. 'Tve worked for years to put you in this position. If you think I'm going to let you destroy the Domain of Alton by some childish scruples, you're mistaken. I'm still lord of the Domain and you are oath‑bound to take my orders without question! The post of cadet‑master is powerful enough to satisfy Dyan, but I'm not going to endanger the rights of the Altons to command. I'm doing it for you, Lew."
*'I wish you'd save your trouble! I don't want it!"
"You're in no position to know what you want. Now do as I tell you: go and give Dyan his appointment as cadet‑master, or"‑he struggled again, ignoring the pain‑"I'll get out of bed and do it myself."
His anger I could face; his suffering was something else. I struggled between rage and a deadly misgiving. "Father, I have never disobeyed you. But I beg you, I beg you," I repeated, "to reconsider. You know that no good will come of this."
He was gentle again. "Lew, you're still very young. Some day you'll learn that we all have compromises to make, and we make them with the best grace we can. You have to do the best you can within a situation. You can't eat nuts without cracking some shells." He stretched out his hand to me. "You're my main support, Lew. Don't force me to fight you too. I need you at my side."
I clasped his hand between my fingers; it felt swollen and feverish. How could I add to his troubles? He trusted me. What right had I to set up my judgment against his? He was my father, my commander, the lord of my Domain. My only duty was to obey.
Out of his sight, my rage flared again. Who would have believed Father would compromise the honor of the Guards? And how quickly he had maneuvered me again, like a puppet‑master pulling strings of love, loyalty, ambition, my own need for his recognition!
I will probably never forget the interview with Dyan Ardais. Oh, he was civil enough. He even commended me on my caution. I kept myself barriered and was scrupulously polite, but I am sure he knew how I felt like a farmer who had just set a wolf to guard the fowl‑house.
There was only one grain of comfort in the situation: 1 was no longer a cadetl
Chapter FIVE
As the cadets walked toward the barracks, Regis among them, he heard little of their chatter and horseplay. His face was burning. He could cheerfully have murdered Lew Alton.
Then a tardy fairness came back to him. Everybody there obviously knew what was going to happen, so it was evidently something that went on now and then. He was just the one who stumbled into it. It could have been anyone.
Suddenly he fe!t better. For the first time in bis life he was being treated exactly like anybody else. No deference. No special treatment. He brightened and began to listen to what
they were saying.
"Where the hell were you brought up, cadet, not to answer
to your name?"
"I was educated at Nevarsin," Regis said, provoking more
jeers and laughter.
"Hey, we have a monk among us! Were you too busy at
your prayers to hear your name?"
"No, it was the hour of Great Silence and the bell hadnt
rung for speech!"
Regis listened with an amiable and rather witless grin, which was the best thing he could possibly have done. A third‑year cadet, superior and highly polished in his green and black uniform, conveyed them into a barracks room at the far end of the courtyard. "First‑year men in here."
"Hey," someone asked, **what happened to the Commander?"
The junior officer in charge said, "Wash your ears next time. He broke some bones in a fall. We aH heard."
Someone said, carefully not loud enough for the officer to hear, "Are we going to be stuck with the bastard all season?"
"Shut up," said Julian MacAran, "Lanart‑Alton's not a bad sort. He's got a temper if you set him off, but nothing like the old man in a rage. Anyway, it could be worse," he added,
with a wary glance at the cadet who was out of range for the moment "Lew's fair and he keeps his hands to himself, which is more than you can say for some people."
Danilo asked, "Who's really going to be cadet‑master? Di Asturien's been retired for years. He served with my grandfather!"
Damon MacAnndra said with a careful look at the officer, "I heard it was going to be you‑know‑who. Captain Ardais."
Julian said, "I hope you're joking. Last night I was down in the armory and ..." His voice fell to a whisper. Regis was too far away, but the lads crowded around him reacted with nervous, high‑pitched giggles. Damon said, "That's nothing. Listen, did you hear about my cousin Octavien Vallonde? Last year‑**
"Chill it," a strange cadet said, just loud enough for Regis to hear. "You know what happened to him for gossiping about a Comyn heir. Have you forgotten there's one in the barracks now?"
Silence abruptly fell over the knot of cadets. They separated and began to drift around the barracks room. To Regis it was like a slap in the face. One minute they were laughing and joking, including him in their jokes; suddenly he was an outsider, a threat. It was worse because he had not really caught the drift of what they were saying.
He drifted toward Danilo, who was at least a familiar face. "What happens now?"
"I guess we wait for someone to tell us. I didn't mean to attract attention and get you in trouble, Lord Regis."
"You too, Dani?" That formal Lord Regis seemed a symbol of the distance they were all keeping. He managed to laugh. "Didn't you just hear Lew Alton remind me very forcibly that nobody would call me Lord Regis down here?"
Dani gave him a quick, spontaneous grin. "Right." He looked around the barracks room. It was bleak, cold and comfortless. A dozen hard, narrow camp‑beds were ranged hi two rows along the wall. All but one had been made up. Dauilo gestured to the only one still unchosen and said, "Most of us were down here last night and picked beds. I guess that one will have to be yours. It's next to mine, anyhow."