Her cheeks were like banners of crimson. She stammered. "I was t‑told that‑that we should look each other over, get to know one another, and that if we 1‑liked each other, then a‑a marriage would be‑" My face must have shown what I was thinking, for she broke off, leaving the sentence unfinished.
Damn them! Trying to run my life again!
The girl's gray eyes were wide, her childish mouth trembling. 1 quickly fought to control my anger, barrier myself. She was obviously very sensitive, at least an empath, perhaps a telepath. I hoped, helplessly, that she wouldn't cry. None of this was her fault. I could just guess how her parents had been bribed or threatened, how she herself had been coaxed and flattered with the lure of a fine marriage to the heir of the Domain.
"Just what did they tell you about me, Linnea?"
She looked confused. "Only that you're Lord Alton's son, that you've served in the Arilinn Tower, that your mother was Terran‑"
"And you think you can bear that disgrace?"
"Disgrace?" She looked puzzled. "Many of us in the Hellers have Terran blood; there are Terrans in my family. Do you think it is a disgrace?"
What could anyone her age know of this kind of court intrigue? I felt revolted, remembering Dyan's gloating look.
Busy with his own affairs . . . Evidently he had known this was in the wind.
"Damisela, I have no mind to marry, and if I did I would not let Council choose a wife for me." I tried to smile, but I suspect it was grim enough. "Don't look so downcast, chiya, a maiden as pretty as you will soon find a husband you'll like better."
"I have no particular wish to marry," she said with composure. "I had intended to apply for admission at one of the towers; my great‑granddame was trained as a Keeper, and it seemed to her I was well fitted for it. But I have always obeyed my family and if they had chosen me a husband, I was not ill‑content. I am only sorry that I seem not to please you."
She was so calm that I felt trapped, almost frantic. "It is not that you displease me, Linnea. But I would not marry at their bidding." My wrath flared up again; I felt her flinch from its impact. Her hand still rested lightly on my arm, as when we were dancing; she drew it away as if she had been burned. I felt like storming away and actually made a faint move to leave her, when I realized, just in time, that this would be a disgraceful thing to do. To abandon a young girl in the middle of a dance‑floor would be a rudeness no man of breeding would ever commit against a gently reared young girl of unquestionable manners and reputation! I couldn't expose her to such gossip for, inevitably, everyone would be wondering what unspeakable thing she could possibly have done to deserve it. I glanced around. Javanne was dancing at the far end of the ballroom so I led Linnea toward the buffet. I offered her a glass of wine; she refused it with a head‑shake. I got her shallan instead, and stood sipping irritably at the wine myself. I didn't like it.
When I was a little calmer I said, "Nothing is irrevocable yet. You can tell whoever put you up to this‑my father, old Hastur, whoever‑you can tell them you don't like me and that will be the end of it."
She smiled, a faint amused flicker. "But I do like you, Dom Lewis," she said. "I won't lie about it, even if I thought I could. Lord Kennard would know it at once if I tried to lie to him. You're angry and unhappy, but I think if you weren't so angry, you'd be very nice. I would be well content with such a marriage. If you wish to refuse it, Lew, you must do the refusing."
If she had been less young, less naive, I might have flung at her that she could hardly be expected to give up a marriage into Comyn with protest. Even so, I am sure she caught the thought, for she looked distressed.
I shut out her thoughts and said flatly, "A woman should have the privilege of refusing. I thought to spare you the of‑fense of hearing me say to my father that I did not‑" I discovered that I could not simply say that I did not like her. I amended it and said, "That I did not intend to marry at their bidding."
Her composure was disquieting. "No one marries at his own will. Do you really feel that a marriage between us would be unendurable, Lew? It is obvious that they will arrange some marriage or other for you."
For a moment I wavered. She was evidently sensitive and intelligent; she had been considered for tower training, which meant laran. My father had evidently gone, to some pains to choose a woman who would be maximally acceptable to me, one with Terran blood, one capable of that emotional and mental fusion a telepath must have in any woman he is to know intimately. She was pretty. She was no empty‑minded doll, but had wit and poise. For a second I considered. Sooner or later I must marry, I had always known that. A Comyn heir must father children. And, the Gods knew, I was lonely, lonely . . .
And my father, damn him, had counted on just this reaction! My anger flared anew. "Damisela, I have told you why I will not be party to any marriage made as this one was made. If you choose to believe that I have rejected you personally, that is your affair." I drank the last in my wineglass and set it down. "Allow me to conduct you to my kinswomen, since Javanne is much occupied."
Javanne was dancing again. Well, let her enjoy herself. She had been married off at fifteen and had spent the last nine years doing her duty to her family. They wouldn't catch me in that trap!
Gabriel had claimed a dance from Linnell‑I was glad to see it‑but Callina was standing at the edge of the floor. The crimson draperies she was wearing only accentuated the col‑orlessness of her bland features. I presented Linnea to her and asked Callina to look after her while I had a word with my father. She looked curious, evidently sensing my anger. I must be broadcasting it right and left.
My rage mounted as I circled the floor, looking for my father. Dyan had known and Hastur had known‑how many others had been dragged into this? Had they held a Council meeting to discuss the fate of Lord Alton's bastard heir? How long had it taken them to find a woman who would have me? They'd had to go far afield, I noticed, and get one young enough to obey her father and mother without question! I supposed I ought to feel flattered that they'd picked a nice looking one!
I found myself face to face with the Regent I gave him a curt greeting and started to pass him by; he laid a hand on my arm to detain me, wishing me the greetings of the season.
"I thank you, my lord. Have you seen my father?"
The old man said mildly, "If you're storming off to complain, Lew, why not come directly to me? It was I who asked my granddaughter to present the girl to you." He turned to the buffet. "Have you had supper? The fruits are exceptional this season. We have ice‑melons from Nevarsin; they're not usually obtainable in the market."
"Thank you but I'm not hungry," I said. "Is it permitted to ask why you take such an interest in my marriage, my lord? Or am I to feel flattered that you interest yourself, without asking why?"
"I take it the girl was not to your liking, then."
"What could I possibly have against her? But forgive me, sir, I have a certain distaste for airing my personal affairs before half the city of Thendara." I moved my hand to indicate the dancing crowds. He smiled genially.
"Do you really think anyone here is intent on anything but his own affairs?" He was calmly filling a plate for himself with assorted delicacies. Sullenly, I followed suit. He moved toward a couple of reasonably isolated chairs and said, "We can sit here and talk, if you like. What's the matter, Lew? You're just about the proper age to be married."
"Just like that," I said, "and I'm not to be consulted?"
"I thought we were consulting you," Hastur said, taking a forkful of some kind of shredded seafood mixed with greens. "We did not, after all, summon you to the chapel at a few hours' notice, to be married on the spot, as was done only a few years ago. I was given no chance even to see my dear wife's face until a few minutes before the bracelets were locked on our wrists, yet we lived together in harmony for forty years."