"An old man back at that last station," Dortmunder said.
The conductor glared at him. "You did it," he said.
Kelp said, "No, he didn't. An old man did, back at that last station."
Greenwood, in the next seat back, said, "That's right. I saw it happen. An old man did it, back at the last station."
The conductor glowered around at everybody. "You expect me to believe that?"
Nobody answered him.
He frowned some more at the hole in the window, then turned around to Murch, sitting across the aisle. "Did you see it?"
"Sure," Murch said.
"What happened?"
"An old man did it," Murch said. "Back at that last station."
The conductor lowered an eyebrow at him. "You with these people?"
"Never saw them before in my life," Murch said.
The conductor gave everybody suspicious looks, then mumbled something nobody could make out and turned away and walked down to the end of the car. He went out the door, and popped back in a second later to call, "Next stop New McKinney," as though daring somebody to make something of it. He glared, waited, then disappeared again and slammed the door.
Dortmunder said to Kelp, "I thought you said the next stop was us."
"It's supposed to be," said Kelp. He looked out the window and said, "Sure it is. There's the place."
Dortmunder looked where Kelp was pointing and saw a large sprawling red brick building off to the right a ways. A tall chain-link fence enclosed the grounds, with metal signs attached to it at intervals. Dortmunder squinted, but couldn't make out what the signs said. He said to Kelp, "What do the signs say?"
"Danger," Kelp told him. "High voltage."
Dortmunder looked at him, but Kelp was gazing out the window, refusing to meet his eye. Dortmunder shook his head and looked out at the asylum again, seeing a set of tracks that curved away from the tracks the train was on and angled around to go under the electrified fence and across the asylum grounds. The tracks were orange with rust, and within the grounds they'd been incorporated in the design of a formal flower bed. A couple of dozen people in white pajamas and white bathrobes were strolling around the grass in there, being watched by what looked like armed guards in blue uniforms.
"So far," Dortmunder said, "I wouldn't say it looks easy."
"Give it a chance," Kelp said.
The train had started to slow, as the asylum moved into the background, and now the door at the far end of the car opened again and the conductor stuck his head in to call, "New McKinney! Newwww McKinney!"
Kelp and Dortmunder frowned at each other. They looked out the window, and the platform was just edging into sight. The sign on it said, NEW MYCENAE.
"New McKinney!" yelled the conductor.
"I think I hate him," Dortmunder said. He got to his feet, and the other four got up after him. They went down the aisle as the train creaked to a stop, and the conductor glowered at them as they disembarked. He said to Murch, "I thought you said you weren't with these guys."
"With who?" Murch asked him and went on down to the platform.
The train started up and stumbled slowly away from the station, the conductor leaning out for a long while to look after his five passengers. The three old men on the platform studied them too, one of them spitting tobacco juice to mark the occasion.
Dortmunder and the others walked through the station and out the other side, where they turned down a mustached fat man who claimed his 1949 Fraser was a cab.
"We can walk it," Kelp told Dortmunder. "It isn't far."
It wasn't. They walked about seven blocks and then they came to the main entrance, with a sign to one side reading, "Clair de Lune Sanitarium." The electrified fence was set back from the road here, with another chain-link fence about five feet in front of it. Two armed guards sat on folding chairs inside the main gate, chatting together.
Dortmunder stopped and looked at it all. "Who've they got in there?" he said. "Rudolf Hess?"
"It's what they call a maximum security bughouse," Kelp told him. "For rich nuts only. Most of them in there are what they call criminally insane, but their family has enough money to keep them out of some state asylum."
"I've wasted a whole day," Dortmunder said. "I could of sold half a dozen encyclopedias today. Sunday's a good day for encyclopedias, you got the husband at home, you tell the husband you'll throw in a bookcase that comes unassembled and he can put it together himself, and he'll hand you his wallet."
Chefwick said, "You mean it can't be done?"
"Armed guards," Dortmunder said. "Electrified fences. Not to speak of the inmates. You want to mix with them?"
Greenwood said, "I was hoping you'd see some way. There oughta be a way to get in there."
"Sure there's a way to get in there," Dortmunder said. "You drop in with a parachute. Now let's see you get out."
Murch said, "Why don't we walk around the place? Maybe we'll see something."
"Like anti-aircraft guns," Dortmunder said. "That is not an easy nuthouse to crack."
Kelp said, "We got an hour to kill before our train back. We might as well walk around."
Dortmunder shrugged. "All right, we'll walk around."
They walked around, and they didn't see anything encouraging. When they got to the rear of the building, they had to leave blacktopped road and walk across scrubby field. They stepped over the rusty orange tracks, and Chefwick said primly, "I keep my tracks in better condition than this."
"Well, they don't use these any more," Kelp said.
Murch said, "Look, one of the loonies is waving at us."
They looked, and it was true. One of the figures in white stood by the flower bed and waved at them. He was shielding his eyes from the sun with his other hand, and he was smiling to beat the band.
They started to wave back to him, and then Greenwood said, "Hey! That's Prosker!"
Everybody stood there with his hand up in the air. Chefwick said, "So it is." He pulled his hand down, and everybody else followed suit. In there by the flower bed Prosker waved and waved, and then began to laugh. He bent over and slapped his knee and went into a fit of laughter. He tried to wave and laugh at the same time and almost fell over.
Dortmunder said, "Greenwood, let me borrow it again."
"No, Dortmunder," said Kelp. "We need him to give us the emerald."
"Except we can't get at him," Murch said. "So it doesn't make any difference."
"We'll see about that," said Dortmunder, and shook his fist at Prosker, who as a result laughed so hard he sat down on the ground. A guard came over and looked at him, but didn't do anything.
Kelp said, "I hate it that we're beaten by a louse like that."
"We aren't," Dortmunder said grimly.
They all looked at him. Kelp said, "You mean-?"
"He can't laugh at me," Dortmunder said. "I've had enough, that's all."
"You mean we're going in after him?"
"I mean I've had enough," Dortmunder said. He looked at Kelp. "You go tell Iko to put us back on the payroll," he said and looked back at Prosker, who was now rolling around on the ground, clutching his ribcage and beating his heels into the turf. "If he thinks he can stay in that place," Dortmunder said, "he's crazy."
4
When the ebony man showed Kelp in, Major Iko was leaning over the pool table sighting down the cue like a sniper with a musket. Kelp looked at the lie of the table and said, "You go for the twelve like that, your cue ball is going to ricochet off the three and drop the eight."
Without moving, the Major lifted his eyes and looked at Kelp. "You're wrong," he said. "I have been practicing.
Kelp shrugged. "Go ahead," he said.
The Major sighted some more, then hit the cue ball, which hit the twelve, ricocheted off the three, and dropped the eight. "Banimi ka junt!" the Major said and threw the cue down onto the table. "Well?" he barked at Kelp. "It's been two weeks since Dortmunder agreed to do the job. Money keeps going out, but no emerald ever comes in."