The three in the back room had been silent five or six minutes when Murch suddenly said, "You know, I've been thinking about it."
"That's a mistake," Kelp said. "Don't think about it. It'll give you a rash."
"I've been sitting here," Murch persisted, "and I've been trying to think what could possibly go wrong this time. Like maybe they moved the bank since yesterday. Like somebody that works there embezzled the emerald."
Chefwick said quietly, "I agree with Kelp. I think you should stop thinking about it at once. Or at least stop talking about it."
Murch said, "But they don't sound right. There's nothing I can think of that sounds like the kind of snafu that happens to us. I'm almost ready to believe Dortmunder is actually going to walk through that door over there with the emerald in his hand." Murch pointed at the door, and it opened, and Greenwood walked in with the vodka sour in his hand. He blinked mildly at the finger Murch was pointing at him and said, "Somebody calling me?"
Murch stopped pointing. "No," he said. "I was just saying I was optimistic, that's all."
"Mistake," Greenwood commented and sat down at the table. "I very carefully left this evening open," he said, "on the assumption we'd all be sitting around this room tonight working out the next caper."
"Don't even say that," said Kelp.
Greenwood shook his head. "If I say it, it might not happen," he said. "But what if I'd called some beautiful and willing young lady and arranged to cook dinner for her at my place tonight? What then, Kelp?"
"Yeah," said Kelp. "You're right."
"Exactly." Greenwood tasted his vodka sour. "Mmm. Very good."
"This is a nice place," Murch agreed. "It's kind of far from my neighborhood, though, to just drop in. Though if I'm on the Belt anyway, or Grand Central, why not." He sipped at his beer and added a little salt.
Kelp said, "What time is it?" but as Chefwick looked at his watch Kelp added quickly, "Don't tell me! I don't want to know."
Greenwood said, "If he does get picked up, if Dortmunder does, we'll have to spring him, of course. The way you guys sprang me."
"Naturally," said Chefwick, and the other two nodded agreement.
"Whether he's got the stone or not, I mean," Greenwood said.
"Sure," said Kelp. "What else?"
Greenwood sighed. "When my dear mother told me to settle down to a steady job," he said, "I really doubt this is what she had in mind."
Murch said, "You think we'll ever really get that stone? Maybe God wants us to go straight, and this is kind of a gentle hint."
"If five jobs for the same emerald is a gentle hint," Kelp said bitterly, "I don't want Him to shout at me."
"Still," said Chefwick, studying his Diet-Rite Cola, "it has been interesting. My first helicopter ride, for instance. And driving Tom Thumb, that was rather pleasant."
"No more interesting jobs," Murch said. "If it's all the same to everybody, I want things dull from now on. All I want is that door should open and Dortmunder should walk in with the emerald in his hand." He pointed at the door again, and it opened again, and Dortmunder walked in with an empty glass in his hand.
Everybody stared at him. Dortmunder stared at the finger pointing at him, then moved out of its line of fire and walked around the table to the vacant chair and the bourbon bottle. He sat down, poured bourbon into his glass, and took a swallow. Everybody watched, unblinking. The silence was so pure he could be heard swallowing.
He looked around at them. His face was expressionless, and so were theirs. Then Dortmunder smiled.
2
The emerald lay in the middle of the scarred wooden table, looking like a beautiful egg laid by the green-metal-shaded hanging light directly overhead. That light was reflected and refracted a thousand times in the prisms of the stone, so that the emerald looked as though it were silently laughing and chuckling and giggling in the middle of the table there. Happy to be the center of attention. Happy to be so much admired.
The five men sitting around the table stared at the emerald for some time, as though expecting pictures of their future to form in its facets. The outside world was far away, faint dim traffic sounds from another planet. The silence in the back room at the O. J. Bar and Grill was both reverential and ecstatic. The five men had an air of awed solemnity about them, and yet they were all smiling. From ear to ear. Gazing at the winking, laughing stone and smiling back at it.
Kelp sighed. He said, "There it is."
The others shifted position, as though waking from a trance. Murch said, "I never thought it would happen."
"But there she is," Greenwood said. "And isn't she a beauty."
"I wish Maude could see that," Chefwick said. "I should have brought my Polaroid to take a picture of it."
"I almost hate to get rid of it," Kelp said.
Dortmunder nodded and said, "I know what you mean. We went through so much for that rock. But we got to get rid of it, and right away. That stone's made me too jumpy. I keep thinking any second that door over there is going to open and a million cops run in."
"They're all downtown beating up children," Greenwood said.
"Nevertheless," Dortmunder said, "the time has come to turn that rock over to Major Iko and collect our money."
Murch said, "You want us all to go? I got my car."
"No," Dortmunder said. "The five of us together might attract attention. Besides, if something goes wrong there should at least be some of us still on the loose and ready to help. Kelp, this was your job first, you brought the rest of us into it, you were the first one the Major contacted. And you're the one that's been bringing him the lists and things all along. You want to bring him the stone?"
"Sure," Kelp said. He was pleased. "If you guys all think I can make it across town."
"Murch can drive you," Dortmunder said, "and we three'll stay here. And if the jinx hits again, it would have hit no matter who was carrying the stone. If it gets you, we'll understand."
Kelp wasn't sure if that was reassuring or not, and while he sat there frowning about it Dortmunder picked up the emerald and put it back into its little black plush box. He handed it to Kelp, who took it and said, "If we're not back in an hour, God knows where we are."
"We'll wait till we hear from you," Dortmunder said. "After you go, I'll call the Major and tell him to open his safe."
"Good." Kelp put the little box away in his pocket, finished his bourbon, and got to his feet. "Come on, Murch."
"Wait'll I finish my beer," Murch said. He was having trouble taking big swallows. Finally he emptied the glass and got to his feet. "Ready," he said.
"See you later," Kelp said to the others and went out. Murch followed him, and the others heard him saying, "The question is, do we go through the park at Sixty-fifth Street, or-" And the door closed.
Dortmunder had to borrow a dime. Chefwick gave him one, and he went out front to the phone booth and called the embassy. He had to talk to two other people before Iko at last got on the phone, and then he said, "We're making delivery this afternoon."
"Are you really?" The Major was obviously delighted. "That is good news. I'd about given up hope."
"So had we all, Major. You understand it's COD."
"Naturally. I have the money waiting in the safe."
"The usual guy is bringing it."
"Not all of you?" The Major sounded disappointed.
"I didn't like the idea of traveling in a bunch. It could get us the wrong kind of attention."
"I suppose so," the Major said dubiously. "Well, it will all work out, I'm sure. Thank you for calling. I'll be expecting our friend."
"Good," Dortmunder said. He hung up and left the booth.
Rollo looked over at him as he started for the back room again and said, "You're lookin' cheerful today."
"It's a cheerful day," Dortmunder said. "Looks like we won't be using your back room any more for a while."