«Twenty-one fifty-six.»
«Madre de Dios! What have you done?»
«Calm down. I’m sure you have many questions. When you feel up to it, we can have a nice lunch and answer all of them for you. You should rest now.»
«I don’t want to rest. Apparently that’s all I’ve been doing for, what, eighteen years? Why are you talking like this? Weren’t you going to get your new body and become a real person again?»
«We encountered too many problems, and I have enough fascinating work to do with my friends here.»
«Mother! We deserted her!»
«Don’t be absurd. I was with her to the end.»
«She’s…dead?»
«She didn’t suffer at all. And she was with her friends.»
Marcus knew what it was like in the Mesh. The machine that keeps the body clean and functioning could only keep one alive for so long. He tried to imagine what it must have been like for Mama during her final days. All he knew was that he should have been there for her.
«What did you tell her about me?»
«I lied. I told her you were doing well. Made up stories about you getting married, having children. Even created some nice photos to show her. She said she could no longer sense your presence. I told her she had gone too far under.»
«She had to know you were lying to her.»
«Perhaps. But the truth was worse, wasn’t it?»
Marcus suddenly wanted to put it out of his head. Now wasn’t the time to agonize over his mother.
«Tell me about Zoya.» Marcus was horrified to realize that Zoya would be middle-aged by now.
«We’ll talk more later. You need to rest.»
«No!» Marcus saw one of the scientists fiddling with controls near the side of the bed. «Don’t put me out now. I need answers.» The world started to fade.
«You’ll have them soon. I am glad you’re back. I love you, Marcus.»
“How are you feeling, Zoya?” Kostya said.
“I’m not Zoya. You made that perfectly clear to me yesterday when I woke up to this…this nightmare. I’m so angry at all of you. I can’t even begin to explain how angry. You had no right!”
“I know Dr. Grachev tried to explain it from his perspective, and I believe he informed you that most of us agree with you completely. I’m not sure he let you know just how little choice we had.”
“Marcus’s father,” Zoya said bitterly.
“Yes, Dr. Saenz is the one with the money, and money was the only thing keeping us going,” Kostya said.
“It’s immoral.”
“You’re right. We’ve done quite a few things that have pushed the edges of immorality over the past six decades, and I’ll admit what was done to both you and Marcus was the hardest for us to stomach.”
Zoya pushed herself up in bed. She didn’t feel weak exactly, but her muscles were still learning how to coordinate properly with her mind. They had told her she could try to walk, but there was no reason to push it.
“Do you know what it’s like for me?” she said. “It’s like waking up the morning after the worst day of my life. I can tell myself all I want that this isn’t the real me, that eighteen years have passed, but the wounds are raw. For me, my mother and brother died two days ago. My best friend was horribly murdered right in front of me. My uncle…”
“I’m very sorry for all you’ve been through,” Kostya said.
“Tyoma…Dr. Grachev…let slip that I’m still alive out there, but when I pressed him on it, he just put me back to sleep. I want to know.”
“May I sit?”
Zoya nodded.
Kostya sat on the foot of her bed. “We did just as Dr. Saenz promised that day. You returned with us to the compound. We gave you medical care and you slept. That’s when Dr. Saenz—”
“Could you please call him Javier? That’s what I’m used to.”
Kostya drew a breath. “Sorry, I’m used to a certain formality with people I don’t know well. So Javier insisted you be plugged in that night, which is when we captured your mind data. The next morning we had you flown out to your friend Irina’s dacha.”
“How is Ira?”
“I’ll get to that soon enough. You were in a terrible state. Tyoma and I tried to insist on getting you professional help to work through the shock, but you refused and Irina backed you up. Then we found that the military was looking for you. Dr. Sae…I mean, Javier, relocated you and Irina’s family to Hafnarfjordur.”
“Haf…what?”
“It’s a pretty little town in Iceland, just outside of Reykjavik. One of our colleagues was born there. He helped change your citizenship. Iceland was one of the few stable, peaceful places at the time, so it seemed a suitable location for you to heal.”
“And?”
“You’re doing well enough. You have two daughters.”
“Oh my God…”
“They’re nearly grown. One is sixteen and the other fifteen.”
“Can I see them?”
“We’re going to have to ask Irina. It’s difficult to say what Zoya’s reaction will be to learning she has a younger version of herself.”
“Ira is fine?”
“Yes, she really is. She’s been doing pottery and sculpting for years. She loves it. Iceland is a remarkably relaxing place.”
“What have…I…been doing?”
“You’ve had more trouble settling on any one thing. You flit from hobby to hobby, never really content with anything you try.”
“And work?”
“You haven’t needed to work. Javier has tremendous resources.”
“Husband?”
Kostya shook his head.
Zoya felt a little dizzy, so she lay down again. “I feel like a toy doll Javier made to be a plaything for his son.”
Kostya nodded. “I could see that. But no one will force you to do anything. You don’t even have to meet Marcus if you don’t wish to. And remember, Marcus had nothing to do with this.”
“I feel bad for him. Maybe as much as I do for myself.”
“He’s asleep now. We brought him out a day after you.”
“He won’t look like the Marcus I knew, will he?”
“No.”
Zoya looked at her own body, which still felt odd. It wasn’t terribly different from her old self, except that it was certainly a few years younger. It was still hard to wrap her mind around the idea of all this being possible, but when she told that to Tyoma yesterday he dismissed the idea, saying that since the beginning of time people, even geniuses, were always saying things were impossible only to be proven wrong by history. But she had always believed in the soul, so what did this mean that there could be two of her alive? She decided that she would like to see Marcus. “Perhaps I can help him get through the shock of what was done to him.”
“I really think you could.”
Zoya pulled the pillow down into an embrace. “Can you please leave me alone for a while? I want to think about…things.”
Kostya put a hand lightly on one of her legs. “Of course. Take all the time you need. If you decide you wish it, Javier would like to speak with you. I understand if you don’t want to, though.”
“I just plug in here…I mean if I decide I want to?”
“There’s no need. Your slot has wireless. You’ll find him in your address book.”
“This is all going to take getting use to.”
Kostya nodded and stood up. “I’ll leave you alone now.”
“Doctor?”
“Hmm?”
“Your kindness has been helpful. I’m not ready to thank anyone for what was done to me, but I’m glad you’re here to help.”
Kostya smiled. “Get some rest. Give a call if you want anything.”
As the doctor departed, Zoya let her mind wander amongst the cascade of thoughts concerning everything that felt like the recent past to her — her mother most of all — and her new life and uncertain future. Would the new Marcus seem real to her? Despite the odd feelings about her new body, she herself felt truly real. She thought of the date they had told her, twenty-one fifty-six. Incredible. So much must have changed in the world outside. She had been roiling with rage since waking yesterday, but in the past few hours a level of excitement had crept into her internal conversation with herself. She had always enjoyed learning, and now there was so much to learn.