Frey did his best approximation of a salute in return. ‘Do what you have to, Doc.’
Malvery held his gaze a moment longer, then strode off towards the Century Knights’ aircraft. Frey thought he walked lightly for a man carrying the future of his c0"› ountry.
‘What now, Cap’n?’ said a voice above him, making him jump. He looked about for the source, and found Jez. She was crouched on the Ketty Jay ’s tail assembly, gazing out across the desert. The sight of her unsettled him. Sitting up there, poised as she was, she looked like something wild.
‘Come down if you wanna talk to me, Jez,’ he said, in an attempt to reassert himself after his fright. ‘I’m not yelling at you up there.’
Jez dropped off the tail of the Ketty Jay, plummeted ten metres and landed beside him in the sand with a soft poomph.
Frey swallowed back an oath and looked around to make sure neither of the Century Knights were about. ‘Can’t you be a bit subtle?’ he said. ‘I’m doing my best not to let the whole world know you’re half Mane.’
She regarded him with an amused light in her eyes. No, not just amused: her eyes were literally brighter than before, reflecting the moonlight like a wolf’s.
‘There’s something different about you,’ he said.
‘Just the same old Jez,’ she assured him with a grin. And maybe it was the way she smiled, or a trick of the shadows, but damn if her teeth didn’t look sharper than before. Then she tilted her head slightly, and the shadows moved, and it was as if he’d never seen it. ‘Well? We got a plan?’
‘The plan is to get out of this desert, for a start,’ he said. ‘Get as far as we can tonight, hole up and hide from Sammie patrols, then back to Vardia when night falls again. I need to buy Crake some new gear and Harkins a new Firecrow and then…’ He shrugged. ‘We’ll see what’s what.’
‘Sounds good,’ she said. ‘I’ll get on it.’ She took a few steps towards the cargo ramp, then stopped and looked back over her shoulder. ‘For what it’s worth, Cap’n. I’m sorry. About her.’
He gave her a wan smile. ‘No need,’ he said. ‘I’m not done yet.’
She raised her eyebrows in disbelief. ‘You don’t stop, do you?’ She half-turned back towards the Ketty Jay, and paused there. Frey saw moisture glittering in her eyes. ‘She’s lucky to have you, Cap’n,’ she said. And then she walked away, before he could ask her what she meant by that.
He wandered a little way from the aircraft and the fire, kicking sand as he went. Behind him, he could hear Pinn and Ashua drunkenly taking the piss out of Crake for getting punched out by a woman. It brought a little smile to his lips.
Dark times lay ahead, there wasn’t musquo; t much doubt of that. But he’d seen dark times before, and he’d survived them. Back in those days, he’d faced the world alone. Not any more, he thought. Those days were gone.
His crew had been more than just a crew for good while now, but it had taken the events of the past few days to make him truly believe that. Maybe he’d just needed them to prove it to him. A lifetime of insecurity and impermanence had left him as a man who didn’t come easily to trust.
But he was sure of them now. After everything they’d done for him, for no profit and at great risk to themselves, he could scarcely be otherwise.
The glue that held them together was equal parts necessity, friendship, habit and desperation. But it held them fast, and Frey was deeply grateful for it. The men and women of the Ketty Jay were the only family Frey had ever had. And just like a family, they were exasperating, hilarious, fractious, affectionate, demanding, self-sacrificing, and he couldn’t get rid of them if he tried.
He looked up at the moon, and felt as if he was teetering on the edge of something. Change was coming. Soon it would be time for the heroes to stand up and be counted.
Well, let them. Frey had his own concerns. He had a crew that had just swelled by one, and they’d be looking to him to steer them through the chaos ahead. That was his task. That and something else.
He looked at the silver ring on his finger.
He’d made a vow. A promise of atonement. And he meant to keep it.
He’d gone some way from the Ketty Jay now, and the immense quiet of the desert surrounded him. Here was limbo, a pause in the world. He was nowhere, and that suited him fine.
There was a feeling that had been growing inside him, for how long he didn’t know. He wasn’t sure what it was, but he’d had his suspicions from the start. Now he needed to name it, to try it on his tongue to see if tasted false. He didn’t dare do it in front of anyone else, so he said it to the moon instead.
‘I love her.’
He stood there a long while, letting the sound of it run through him. Finally, he nodded to himself.
‘Right,’ he said. ‘There it is.’
Then he turned and walked back to the Ketty Jay, and his friends, and whatever would come after.