16
“Absolutely not. I’m sorry, Celia. But no.” Gwen’s normal calm had been visibly shaken by my request.
I didn’t understand why it bothered her. “But it worked so well last time. I know it’s helped Dawna and isn’t Emma considering it? Really, magical memory suppression isn’t that big of a deal. It’s even advertised on children’s networks.”
Her jaw set hard under flashing eyes. “And I’d outlaw that if I could. We’re just now, after fifty years of using this technique, finding out the damage it can do to the memory centers of the brain.”
That widened my eyes. “Damage? What kind of damage?”
She leaned back in her high-backed chair, frustrated. “Early-onset Alzheimer’s, mysterious headaches, and even strokes. My research since your kidnapping has changed my mind about the use of the therapy. I’m only willing to use the technique now on very severe cases, and only on the moment of crisis.”
Wow. Well, didn’t that just suck moss-covered swamp rocks? My headaches were getting more frequent and worse. “Could it affect … memory itself?” I mean, there might be a spell, too, but who knew if they were related? I asked, almost afraid of hearing the answer.
She shook her head and I felt a wave of pressure lift off my chest. The relief was enough to make me light-headed. “No, there’s been nothing in the research like that.”
“Then it must be the spell. Rizzoli said the second bomb was supposed to erase all traces of the first one, even memories. And John did find traces of a spell he wanted to look into.”
“That could well be it. Still, if you’re having memory problems, maybe we need to explore that. Tell me about the last two days—with as much detail as you can. And please, tell me everything. It could be quite important.”
While it wasn’t a normal request from Gwen, I had to admit that I was flattered by her intense attention.
She listened with her whole body, taking notes as I recounted the days since the bomb at the school. While she’d only asked for two days, it was important to me that someone listen to everything that had happened to me since then and why I thought there was a problem. Writing things down had helped me focus my thoughts a lot, so some of it probably sounded sort of rehearsed.
Occasionally, she would interrupt with a logical question, but mostly she just listened. The hour timer rang, but she didn’t miss a beat. She just shut it off and spun her hand in encouragement. “Please continue.”
So I did. I let it all out—as much of the interrogation as I could that wouldn’t be classified, the bomb, Ivy, Bruno, the cop who pulled me over, Dawna, John. There was so much seething anger, fear, and pain roiling around inside me and I didn’t even realize it until it all came out. “So,” I said, snuffling after my fifth tissue in the past five minutes, “am I a complete loon?”
“Actually, you’re not.” It almost sounded like she was surprised. “Most people would be. You are very mature for your age, but…” There was always a but with Gwen. “You have to learn to give up some control. Much of your anxiety stems from taking everything onto yourself. You can alienate people just by your sheer dominance.”
I shrugged, feeling my defenses leap back to full power. “I sort of have to. Nobody else steps up to the plate. If I alienate people who aren’t doing their job … um, so? Do I care if they like me? No. I would rather they like me, but I would also rather they do the right thing so I don’t have to get involved. Does that make sense?”
Like a spider leaping on a fly from above, the next words out of her mouth caught me by such surprise. I froze, barely breathing. “Like your mother?”
“Well … yes, I suppose. But I have stepped away from that. Like I told Ivy, she made her choices and she’ll have to pay the price. Lord knows I have, plenty of times.”
“So you wouldn’t … for example, help her hide from the police?”
What a weird question. “Um, no. I never have before. In fact, I usually tipped off the cops where she was, especially when she was driving drunk.”
“When’s the last time you saw her?” I felt my hackles rise, and Gwen must have seen something in my face, because she said, calm as ever, “Celia, please don’t get agitated. I’m only trying to help.”
Agitated? Who was agitated? Just because I could feel my heart pounding and my fists were clenched? “Why are you asking me these questions, Gwen?” My voice was coming out in a growl. It was too early in the day for the vampire to need to come out and play. I’d even eaten, and I knew there was plenty of meat broth in the smoothie. I was in control. “I’m dealing with Mom. I am. She’s in the best place for her right now. They can help her. I can’t.”
Gwen sighed. “I believe you, Celia. But I had to ask.” She raised her voice. “You can come in, ladies.”
Ladies? Huh? I turned and jumped to my feet as the door to the office opened. Two casually dressed women walked in. I vaguely recognized one of them but couldn’t remember from where. It wasn’t until her intense eyes met mine that I remembered. Her name was Baker. She was tall and buff, with hair cropped short in a buzz cut that should have been very masculine. I’d envied the weapons on her belt when I’d first met her and she’d added a few since then. She was a siren, the queen’s own security.
Oh, crap.
The woman bowed her head in respect. “Princess. I’d hoped you knew something that you could share. But we didn’t want to startle you, so we came first to your healer.”
I felt a chill come over me as I remembered Ivy’s frantic motions. “What’s wrong with my mother? That’s what you’re here about, aren’t you? Where is she?”
The second guard, with a name tag that read Natura, dipped her head politely. “I’m afraid we don’t know. She was taking her daily walk along the beach path but never came back to the facility. Several boats went to the mainland that day, so…”
I tried to process what they’d just said. “Um, let me get this straight. You let a woman known for avoiding the law out of her cell … alone?” Holy Crap! “How long has she been gone?”
Baker let out a low, frustrated growl and wouldn’t look at the woman with her. “Two days. While I wouldn’t have made the same choices as my associate, Princess, please understand that, like you, your mother is royalty. That allowed for more privileges. And since one of her ailments was ocean withdrawal, walking near the water helped center her. For a time after she disappeared, we believed she was visiting with someone, but after searching the whole island, we’re convinced she’s left.”
Great. Just fucking great. They’ve been treating my conniving mother like a freaking celebrity. She would eat that up and absolutely take advantage of it. I reached up to try to rub away the sudden headache that was making my forehead throb. Different headache for a different problem. No wonder Ivy was so panicked. Not only had she probably watched Mom slip onto a boat, she wouldn’t be able to track her over water. Ghosts don’t do well over running water, just like vampires. “Um, wow. I can’t even describe the level of wrong that was. It had never occurred to me in my wildest nightmares that you might let her outside of a walled and spelled environment until she’d gotten massive therapy. But if you’re asking if she’s come to see me, the answer is an emphatic no. I am the last person on earth she would go to in a crisis. She’d be more likely to roll a junkie for money.” I sighed and collapsed back into the chair where I’d been sitting. Well, gosh, hadn’t this been an emotional roller coaster of a session? “Where else have you looked on the mainland?”