I close my eyes and bite my lower lip, taking myself backward just enough to meet her as she rises again.
“Come with me,” she says.
That permission brings every sensation just below the surface, and I’m already in disbelief as to how far it goes.
“Now,” she whispers and she quivers over me, my still-cuffed hands resting against her upper thighs, the long chain of the handcuffs only occasionally altering my motion.
Then, in a dark flash of something beyond my experience, I rise upward, my abs tightening and just as quickly releasing, again and again as every bit of me that I can even imagine goes within her, perfect.
My eyes close and open, watching her as she watches me, brows furrowed, mouths open and voiceless in our moment of shared trance.
The moment feels like it is going to last forever, but it transforms into an all-encompassing peaceful relaxation and I put my arms over my head so she can creep closer into me, her skin and my skin no meaningful difference anymore.
It takes some time to catch our breath, and even when we do, we’re beyond speech.
Somewhere in another reality, I can hear the sound of a phone ringing, but it couldn’t be more distant, more muted.
“That might be my dad,” Jessica whispers, and I lift my arms so she can crawl out to reach it.
She’s still on top of me and I’m still inside of her as she answers the phone.
“Hello?” she says. “No, I was just sleeping. What’s up?”
She bends down to kiss my chest.
“Yeah, he’s here, why?” she asks and I’m hardly lucid enough to wonder.
Jessica rises off of me, and I sit up.
“I’m going to go grab a towel,” I whisper to her.
I get to the bathroom and remove the condom slowly. After tossing it in the trashcan, I find two towels, one for her, one for me.
With mine, I begin to clean myself as I slowly walk back toward the bedroom, but Jessica meets me in the hallway, her expression inscrutable.
I hold the towel out toward her and she snatches it quickly before handing me the phone, saying, “Congratulations. Linda’s pregnant.”
Chapter Nineteen
The New World
Jessica
I don’t wait for an explanation, I simply get dressed while only ever a few feet away, Eric is talking into the phone.
If I could tell what he was saying, I would, but it’s all a dull cacophony as I grab my things and push past him toward the door.
“Wait!” I can hear him calling behind me.
The only reason that I stop is that he has my phone and my dad could call at any moment.
The conversation went something like this:
I said, “Hello.”
Linda said, “Hey, are you okay? Your voice sounds funny. Is something wrong?”
I answered, “No, I was just sleeping. What’s up?”
She asked, “Are you with Eric?”
“Yeah, he’s here, why?” I responded.
“I just really need to talk to him,” she said.
Eric told me that he was going to go grab some towels and he left the room as I was saying, “He’s kind of busy at the moment. Is it important?”
The line was quiet for a few seconds.
She finally answered, saying, “I just got back from the doctor. I’m pregnant. I really need to talk to Eric.”
Already knowing the answer, I asked, “Why do you need to talk to him?”
The line was quiet again.
“Linda?”
She took a loud breath and said, “Because he’s the father.”
That’s when I left the room and found him wiping himself off from the sex we’d just had.
Now, he’s standing in front of me, asking his question into the phone, “Are you sure?”
I just stand there, ready to rip the phone out of his hand, but I’m stuck, unmoving.
“All right,” he says, finally. “I’ll talk to you tomorrow, then.”
He hangs up and I snatch the phone from his hand, yelling, “What the fuck?”
His hands are up and in front of him and he’s saying, “It happened a few months back, before anything happened with us.”
“Funny how you never bothered mentioning that you fucked one of my employees,” I rejoin. “What the fuck were you thinking?”
“I don’t know how this happened,” he says. “We were careful.”
“Careful?” I ask. “You don’t get someone pregnant by being careful. Did you use a condom?”
His hesitance is not doing him any favors.
“No,” he says, “but I pulled out well before I… you know.”
“God, you’re a fucking idiot,” I tell him. “Were you ever planning on mentioning this to me?” I ask.
“I don’t know,” he says. “It only happened the one time. I haven’t even thought about it in—”
“Yeah, I’m sure that’ll be a fun story to tell your new kid,” I interrupt. “I need to get the hell out of here.”
“Please,” he says, “wait. I want to talk to you about this.”
“There’s nothing to talk about!” I shout at him. “Do you have any idea what that’s like: having the most intimate, mind-blowing sex you’ve ever had in your life and immediately afterward to get a phone call saying the person you just slept with has a baby on the way and oh, by the by, it’s with a friend of yours?”
He takes a step toward me, saying, “Listen, I know I should have told you, but it happened months before we ever got together.”
“Get some fucking clothes on,” I snap. “I can’t be here right now. This is so fucked.”
He follows me about as far as the door, but he stops short of public nudity. All the while, he’s calling behind me, saying, “Wait!” he’s saying, “Jessica, stop!”
I’m not stopping for a fucking thing.
I get down to my car and I just sit there in the driver’s seat for a minute, waiting for the rest of the world I was beginning to envision to crumble before me.
Yeah, we weren’t together when it happened and as far as I know, Linda still doesn’t know that we’re together.
Why did she try to call him on my phone, though?
That’s an easy enough answer: They didn’t even bother exchanging phone numbers.
I feel like an idiot and when my phone rings again, I’m ready to throw it out the fucking window, right until I realize that it might be my dad with an update on my mom.
“Oh, I need good news right now,” I mutter as my hands shake over my phone’s screen. “I can’t handle bad news right now. I can’t take any more fucked up—” I answer the phone, “Hey, Dad. Did they get the test results back?”
“Are you okay, sweetheart?” he asks. “You sound upset.”
“Don’t worry about me,” I tell him. “I’m going to be fine. Have you heard anything about Mom?”
“The doctor just came in,” he says. “It looks like they got everything. They’re going to have her come back to make sure it doesn’t regrow, but from the look of things, she’s going to be just fine.”
“Oh, thank god,” I tell him. “I really don’t think I could handle any more bad news right now.”
“What’s going on, Jessica?” he asks.
“I really don’t want to talk about it right now, Dad,” I tell him. “Thanks for calling and telling me what’s going on with Mom. When do you think they’re going to let her go home?”
“They’re going to keep her overnight just to make sure her SATs stay where they need to be and give her another night with the painkillers. They gave her a prescription, but I guess it’s not as strong as what she’s getting in—sweetheart, are you crying?” he asks.
“Yeah, Dad,” I tell him. “I’m crying. I’m sorry. It’s just been a rough day since I left your house.”
“Did something happen with Eric?” he asks. “What’s going on?”
“Dad, I really don’t feel up to talking about it right now. What’s important is that Mom’s going to be okay,” I tell him. “I’ll call you tomorrow. I promise,” I lie, “I’m going to be just fine.”
Hesitantly, he responds, “All right, sweetheart. If you need anything at all, even if you want to just talk, you give me a call, okay?”