That evening, it took four men to carry the selected archives up to the offices of the SD. Kehrig was in a foul mood. “Come on, Obersturmführer,” he growled when he saw my boxes, “I thought I’d asked you to sort through all that!”—“You should see what I left behind, Sturmbannführer.”—“Maybe. We’re going to have to borrow some more translators. All right. Your car is ready, ask for Höfler. Leave early. Now go see Callsen.” In the hallway, I met Untersturmführer Zorn, another junior officer, who usually assisted Häfner. “Ah, Dr. Aue. You’re lucky.”—“Why do you say that?”—“Well, to be leaving. Filthy business, tomorrow.” I nodded: “No doubt. Is everything ready, then?”—“I don’t know. I just have to take care of the cordon.”—“Zorn does nothing but complain,” protested Janssen, who had joined us.—“Have you solved the problem?” I asked.—“Which one?”—“The problem of the Jews. How to find them.” He laughed dryly: “Oh, that! It’s very simple really. The AOK is going to print some posters: all Jews are requested to report tomorrow morning to the main square for forced labor. We’ll take the ones who come.”—“And you think there will be enough of them?”—“The Obergruppenführer says that yes, it never fails, it works every time. If not, we’ll arrest the Jewish leaders and threaten to shoot them if they’re not all there.”—“I see.”—“Ah, what a mess” Zorn sighed. “Fortunately I just have to look after the cordon.”—“At least you’re there,” Janssen grumbled. “Not like that pig Häfner.”—“It’s not his fault,” I objected. “He wanted to stay. It’s the Sturmbannführer who insisted he accompany them.”—“Right, exactly. And why isn’t he here, then?” He looked at me darkly. “I’d also like to take a trip to Lublin or Lemberg.” I shrugged and went to find Callsen. He was poring over a map of the city along with Vogt and Kurt Hans. “Yes, Obersturmführer?”—“You wanted to see me.” Callsen seemed much more in command of himself than in the afternoon, almost relaxed. “You will tell Brigadeführer Dr. Rasch that Obergruppenführer Jeckeln confirms the army’s orders and is personally taking control of the Aktion.” He stared at me with calm eyes; obviously, Jeckeln’s decision had taken a weight off his shoulders. “He also confirms my position as acting commander until Sturmbannführer von Radetzky returns,” he went on, “unless the Brigadeführer has another preference. Finally, for the Aktion, he is lending us Ukrainian auxiliaries and a company from the Ninth Police Reserve Battalion. That’s it.” I saluted and went out without saying a word. That night, I stayed awake for a long time: I was thinking of the Jews who would be coming the next day. I thought the method adopted very unfair; the Jews of goodwill would be punished, the ones who might have come to trust the word of the German Reich; as for the others, the cowards, the traitors, the Bolsheviks, they’d stay hidden and we wouldn’t find them. As Zorn said, it was a fine mess. I was happy to leave for Lemberg, it would be an interesting trip; but I wasn’t satisfied with avoiding the Aktion that way; I thought something like that was a serious problem, but that you should confront it and resolve it, for yourself at least, and not run away from it. The others—Callsen, Zorn—wanted to wash their hands of it, or at least not assume responsibility for it: that wasn’t right, to my thinking. If we were committing an injustice, we ought to think about it, and decide if it was necessary and inevitable, or if it was only the result of taking the easy way out, of laziness, of a lack of thought. It was a question of rigor. I knew that these decisions were made at a much higher level than our own; still, we weren’t automatons, it was important not just to obey orders, but to adhere to them; yet I was having doubts, and that troubled me. Finally I read a little and slept for a few hours.
At four o’clock I got dressed. Höfler, the driver, was already waiting for me in the mess with some bad coffee. “If you like I also have some bread and cheese, Obersturmführer.”—“No, that’s okay, I’m not hungry.” I drank my coffee in silence. Höfler dozed. Outside, there wasn’t a sound. Popp, the soldier who was to serve as my escort, joined us and started eating noisily. I got up and went out to smoke in the courtyard. The sky was clear, the stars were shining above the tall façades of the former monastery, closed and impassive in the gentle white light. I couldn’t see the moon. Höfler came out and saluted me: “Everything’s ready, Obersturmführer.”—“Did you take some cans of gas?”—“Yes. Three.” Popp was standing next to the front door of the Admiral, looking awkward and content with his rifle on his shoulder. I motioned to him to get in back. “Usually, Obersturmführer, the escort sits in front.”—“Yes, but I’d rather you got in back.”