“What do you think could be wrong?” Beth interjected.
“No offense, but you don’t want to know. Right now, let me start pulling strings and—”
“I’m going to go with him.” Beth stared so hard at V’s shellan, it was a wonder she didn’t burn a hole in the woman’s head. “If he has to get that test done, I’m going with.”
“Fine, but we’ll keep the team to an absolute minimum. This is going to be hard enough to pull off without taking an army with us.”
Vishous’s mate turned away and jogged down the stairs, and as she went, she gradually lost her form, her body’s weight and presence dissipating until she was a ghostly apparition floating down the carpet.
Spook or solid, it didn’t matter, Beth thought. She’d rather be treated by that woman than anyone else on the planet.
Oh, God … John.
Beth turned to Blay and Qhuinn. “Do either of you know what he was trying to communicate?”
Both of them glanced over at Wrath. And then promptly shook their heads.
“Liars,” she muttered. “Why won’t you tell me—”
Wrath started to massage her shoulders, like he wanted to calm the little woman down—and didn’t that suggest that even if the particulars were unknown because of his blindness, he had read the emotions. He was like that. He knew something.
“Just let it go, leelan.”
“Do not play boys’ club with me,” she said, pulling away and glaring at the cock-and-balls brigade. “That’s my brother—and he was trying to talk to me. I deserve to be in on this.”
Blay and Qhuinn got busy looking at the carpet. The mirror over the side table next to the study’s open doors. Their fingernails.
Clearly, they were hoping a wormhole would open up under their shitkickers.
Well, too bad, boys—life wasn’t an epi of Doctor Who. And you know what? The idea that pair—as well as every other male in the house—would always defer to Wrath made her even more pissed off. But short of stamping her feet and looking like a total ass, she had no choice but to shelve the fight for later when she and her mate had some privacy.
“Leelan—”
“My ice cream is melting,” she muttered as she went over and picked up the tray. “It would make my night if any of you three would get real with me. But I shouldn’t hold my breath for that, should I.”
As she marched off, the sense of foreboding that followed her was nothing new—ever since Wrath had been shot, she’d felt like another shoe was going to drop at any moment, and gee, seeing her brother on the carpet did so much to improve that paranoia.
Not.
Coming up to the door that had been Blay’s before he’d moved in with Qhuinn, she pulled herself together.
It didn’t work, but she knocked anyway. “Layla?”
“Come in,” was the muffled reply.
Balancing the tray awkwardly on her hip, it was hard to get a good hold on the knob—
Payne, V’s sister, opened things up with a smile. And man, she was an impressive presence, especially in all that black leather: She was the only female on rotation to fight in the field with the Brothers—and she must have just come home from a shift.
“Good evening, my queen.”
“Oh, thanks.” Beth hitched her load up and entered the lavender bedroom. “I’m bringing provisions.”
Payne shook her head. “I rather think it’s going to be necessary. I can’t imagine there’s anything left in her stomach—in fact, I believe she’s evacuated all the food she ate last week, too.”
As retching sounds drifted out of the bathroom, they both winced.
Beth eyed the bowl of Breyers. “Maybe I should come back later—”
“Don’t you dare,” the Chosen called out. “I feel great!”
“Doesn’t sound that way—”
“I’m hungry! Don’t you dare leave.”
Payne shrugged. “She has an amazing attitude. I come in here to get inspired—although not to go into my needing, which is why I need to leave now.”
While V’s sister shuddered again, like a female’s cycle and the whole baby thing was nothing she was interested in, Beth put the tray on top of an antique bureau. “Well, actually … that’s what I’m hoping for.”
Payne’s poleaxed expression made her curse. “What I mean is … um…”
Yeah, how to dig her way out of this one.
“You and Wrath are going to have a young?”
“No, no, no—hold on.” As she put her palms up, she tried to develop a bailout plan. “Ah…”
Payne’s embrace was fast as a gust and as strong as a male’s, crushing the breath out of Beth’s lungs. “This is wonderful news—”
Beth pushed her way out of those iron bars. “Actually, we’re not there yet. I’m just … look, don’t tell Wrath I’m in here, okay?”
“So you want to surprise him! How romantic!”
“Yeah, he’ll be surprised, all right.” As Payne gave her a strange look, Beth shook her head. “Look, to be honest, I don’t know that my needing will necessarily be good news.”
“An heir to the throne could really help him, though. If you’re thinking politically.”
“I’m not and I never will.” Beth put her hand on her stomach and tried to imagine something other than three squares and a couple of desserts in it. “I just … really want a baby, and I’m not sure he’s on board. If it happens, though … well, maybe it’ll be a good thing.”
Actually, he’d told her once he didn’t see children in their future. But that had been a while ago and …
Payne gave her shoulder a quick squeeze. “I’m happy for you—and I hope this works. But as I said, I better go, because if that old superstition is true, I don’t want to find myself in trouble.” She turned to the bathroom’s partially closed door. “Layla! I have to head out!”
“Thanks for coming by! Beth? You’re staying, yes?”
“Yup. I’m here for the duration.”
As Payne took off, Beth had too much energy to sit down, the idea that she was keeping something from Wrath not sitting well. Bottom line, they needed to talk this out; it was just a question of finding a good “when” for that.
And the whole needing/kid thing wasn’t the only thing hanging over her. That confron with Wrath and the boys still stung. Men. She loved the Brotherhood—each one of them would lay down his life for her and had always put their flesh and blood where it counted with Wrath. But sometimes the all-for-one, one-for-all stuff drove her nuts—
More heaving. To the point where Beth winced and put her face in her hands.
Get ready for this, she told herself. It’s all well and good to have delusions of dollies and plush toys, cooing and cuddles, but there was a ground level to parenting—and pregnancy—that she’d better be prepared to handle.
Although at this rate, her needing didn’t seem to be in a big hurry to show up. She’d been in here every night for how long? And yeah, she was feeling hormonal—or it could be that life was just really hard right now.
Yeah, ’cuz that’s exactly when you start trying for a kid.
She must be insane.
Hitting the bed and stretching out her legs, she reached for her pint of Ben & Jerry’s and attacked it with her spoon. Stabbing into the carton, she dug out the chocolate chunks and ground them between her molars, not particularly tasting anything.
She’d never been an emotional eater before, but lately? She was chomping down when she wasn’t hungry, and it was beginning to show.
On that note, she lifted up her shirt and popped the button and the zipper on her jeans.
Sagging against the pillows, she wondered how it was possible to go from the heights of passion and connection to this morose depression so fast: At the moment, she was convinced she was never going to go into her needing, much less conceive … and that she was married to a guy who was a serious lunkhead.
Resuming her digging, she managed to excavate the mother lode of chunk veins and told herself to get a grip. Or … at the very least wait for all the chocolate to kick in and elevate her mood.