“Are you well?”
“Just thumping wonderful, thank you very much for asking…” Alan sneered.
“That’s my bully buck. We’ll make a sailor of you yet.”
“Mine arse on a band-box!”
“Got to set your mind to it or you won’t get on in the Navy. Not just reading about it, but doing it, like this. Turning into a real tarpaulin man.”
“Like Chapman?” Lewrie asked sarcastically.
“Well, Chapman,” Ashburn said. “There’s a blank page for you. He’s failed the exam twice now. A good sailor but sharp as an anvil. I expect he’ll always be a midshipman.”
“Can one do that? I mean, that would be awful—”
“You’re an educated type, Lewrie. You’re miles ahead of most of us, you know. Social skills, good tutors. Can’t expect eight-year-olds to come aboard as a captain’s servant and learn much more than the sea. Think how you and I shall stand out when we become officers.”
“What about Rolston?” Lewrie asked. He had been plagued by the little bastard, showing off his skills and knowledge, finding subtle ways when they were working together to belittle Alan’s small contributions, or toady to the officers and warrants and shine at Lewrie’s expense.
“Now that’s a real Welsh mile, he is! I feel sorry for whatever crew gets him as a post-captain. Well, let’s go down.”
“Thank God…”
“Make your way back to the mast without killing yourself, and we’ll go down one of the backstays.”
“Why can’t we just climb back down the way we came up?”
“Not seamanly. You’ll have to cross your legs over the stay and let yourself down hand over hand.”
“You keep finding new ways to scare hell out of me.”
“If I beat you down to the deck I’ll make you climb back up here and do it all over again.”
Lewrie was closest to the mast, so he reached a backstay first, but took a moment to decide how to proceed. With a death grip, he had seized the stay, levered himself out into the open air, flipped a leg around the rope and cocked it behind his knee. It was then that he discovered that standing rigging is coated with tar, which can be slippery. He could not hang on, and he could not remain in one place. Even with both legs about the stay, he was sliding slowly down, gaining speed as he went! There was nothing to do but try to go down hand over hand, but in a moment he was moving too fast to brake his descent with his hands, which were burning on the hemp rope. With some heartfelt (and very English) words of pain and terror, he screeched his way down to crash feet first onto the quarterdeck and tumble in a heap, his hands on fire.
“On your feet there, young sir,” Captain Bales said angrily. “I will teach you that I will have no blaspheming in my ship. Bosun’s Mate? Half dozen of your best for Mister Lewrie. At once, sir!”
Alan Lewrie finally met the gunner’s daughter, bent over a quarterdeck nine-pounder and slashed on the buttocks by a Bosun’s Mate with a stiffened rope “starter.” Once chastised, Bales ordered him aloft again, to climb each mast in succession and lay out on each topsail yard in turn until Bales was satisfied with his progress. And Bales had a great deal of patience in watching him.
* * *
“Mister Lewrie,” Turner, one of the master’s mates, called to him as he paced along the starboard gangway above the waist, one damp and dreary afternoon.
“Aye, Mister Turner.”
“Captain Osmonde ’ere wants a boat ter go ashore an’ fetch out cabin stores fer the wardroom. Yer it,” Turner told him, standing rat-scruffy next to the elegantly uniformed Marine officer.
“Me, sir?” They hadn’t allowed him outboard since he had joined, and he knew nothing about boats.
“O’ course, yew, sir, now git wif it.”
“Here is the list, Mister Lewrie,” Osmonde said, handing him a sheet of paper. “The particular chandler’s name is on this bill, and his place of business. Be sure and get a receipt.”
“Aye aye, sir.”
Now, how do I do this? he wondered, turning away. The duty bosun’s mate has charge of the boats. I’ll try him …
Lewrie hustled up Ream, a husky young man, explained what was needed, and a boat’s crew was there in a twinkling, scrambling down the side to an eight-oared cutter tied below the main chains. Alan went through the gate and lowered himself down the ladder to stumble into the boat and make his way aft to the tiller. The crew sat waiting for him to say something, but for the life of him, he could not think of what the proper order was.
Well, we can’t go on staring at each other like this.
“Let’s … shove off, then,” he said, and the bowman undid the painter and fended them off from the ship’s side with his boat hook.
So far, so good, he told himself shakily; now we need these oars in the water. “Out oars,” he said with a confidence he did not feel.
Eight men lowered their blades into the water and shipped them to the rowlocks, then sat looking dumbly obedient for the next command.
“Give way … er … starboard.”
Sounds as good as any, he thought.
The oarsmen paused for a short moment, took the opportunity to look at each other, and then the four starboard oarsmen dug in for a stroke. Naturally, under their thrust, the boat swung back alongside Ariadne and nuzzled her timbers with a series of bumps, much like a piglet would prod her sow for a teat.
“God strike me blind, but you’re hopeless,” came a strangled wail from the quarterdeck.
“Oh, stop that,” Alan said, waving at the starboard oarsmen. “Shove off again. Give way … over here!”
Someone in the boat began to snigger, choking on a laugh that could cost him a dozen lashes if he was not careful. The boat made it away from Ariadne’s side this time. She also continued to circle to the right until she was pointing back at the ship.
“Today, you clown!” came a shout from above.
“Just what does he expect, Jason and the bloody Argonauts?” Lewrie muttered under his breath. Two more oarsmen began to laugh. I couldn’t look any more stupid if I sank the damned thing. “I’m open to suggestions,” he said with a sheepish grin.
“Easy all, sor,” the closest oarsman whispered.
“Easy all,” Lewrie parroted aloud.
“Tiller, sor,” the other closest man muttered. “Center it up.” He took hold of the heavy tiller bar and laid his arm along it, lining it up in the direction of the bows.
“Ah, yes. Now … give way all,” Lewrie said, remembering those instructions that Rolston had used weeks before.
The two closest hands winked at him and began to set the pace for the stroke. The boat began to pick up speed, lifting and rising through a slight chop, with a pleasing sort of surge forward each time they dug in with the oars.
He was headed in the general direction of the shore, but there was one slight problem; from water level, he hadn’t a clue where he was going, and nothing looked remotely familiar. He was lost.
“Anyone from Portsmouth here?” he asked.
“I am … sir,” one of the forward men said between strokes.
“I am looking for a certain chandler’s named Kenner & Sons. Do we have to land at the fleet landing and walk, or is there an easier way?”
“Pale … brick place … sir. There’s a … red n’ white gig by it right now … sir,” the man said. Lewrie found the distinctive gig and gingerly turned the tiller, first the wrong way, then back to the other side of a few degrees, which brought them in a gently curving path towards the particular landing where they needed to go.