Выбрать главу

31

When his body wrapped around mine, I felt safe. Behind me, chest to back, leg to leg, he became the opposite of a shadow: a stronger, larger, taller me who could not be bullied or broken. His hands cupping mine made a nest out of my palms, a promise that nothing would bite me, nor would I be allowed to crush what I held.

Once, I had imagined that in a jail cell I would curl on the bed and think of nothing but the beauty of Zach’s body. But as I fell asleep in the back of the police car my mind sought only those hours with Rudi, in the barn or shed, in the snow. Where the world was the fairy tale, and hard nightmares were the stuff of books and outposts where Jesus did not tread. As I drifted off, in my mind’s eye I sat on a straw bale and rested my cheek against Rudi’s arm while he paged through my book of moral tales, laughing at the absurdity of horror. The bare wooden walls marked the edges of my world just then. I was a good little girl, not a bad one, and I had never considered that a teacher might be wrong.

Seek out what’s beautiful, I had instructed Maggie, and love it before it rots. But I had been wrong. Beautiful men stay beautiful forever. That which is lovely remains so, preserved behind glass in one’s mind.

And so I carried it all with me, the beautiful and the terrible alike, to keep me company, and left the ordinary world.

ACKNOWLEGMENTS

With deep appreciation, I would like to acknowledge the individuals who walked with me along the path of writing this novel.

Stephany Evans, my wonderful agent, who had faith in my idea and my ability to bring it to light. Thank you.

Susan Swinwood and the team at MIRA Books, for believing in the manuscript, and for doing a stellar job in editing and taking it to market.

My first readers and tiny fan club: Amanda Skjeveland, Kathy Gaertner, Jassy Mackenzie, Sara Roseman, Randi Anderson (also known as Mom), Laura Wilcott, Hillary Myers, Elizabeth Gardner, Stephanie Cebula, Gary Presley—and a special thanks to Erica Hayes. I am also thankful to the judges and reviewers at the Amazon Breakthrough Novel Award who gave the book an approving nod.

D.S. and S., whose candid insights brought Zach and Judy to life in my mind.

I would like to express gratitude, amorphous though it may be, to the cities of Greenbelt, Maryland, and North Conway, New Hampshire, as well as to a certain little Waldorf school that welcomed my family when we were young and broke. I hope my fondness for each of you is visible in this text.

And finally, my husband, Mike, and all four of my children—for your sacrifices, for your patience and for the steady supply of caffeine, I thank you from the bottom of my heart.

We hope you enjoyed The Kingdom of Childhood, and that the following Questions for Discussion help to enhance your book club discussions.

QUESTIONS FOR DISCUSSION

1. The story is set in 1998 amidst the release of the Starr Report and President Clinton’s impeachment, and as the novel opens, there is intense discussion in the media about these subjects. Do you feel the “national conversation” about the Lewinsky affair opened avenues of discussion that would have been inappropriate for Zach and Judy otherwise?

2. The first few chapters of the novel show an increasingly skewed set of boundaries between Judy and Zach that allow the affair to occur. Did this seem realistic to you? Was the process of dissolving their boundaries similar to what happens in affairs between consenting adults?

3. The Waldorf school movement is an educational approach that is widely practiced around the world and yet little known outside those communities. Its philosophy extends beyond the classroom to the entire lifestyle of the families involved. How did you feel about the way of life Zach’s family, and the others in the story, have adopted? Did it seem appealing or too intrusive? Were there any aspects that stood out to you? Judy’s children, Scott and Maggie, both rebel from their upbringing in different ways. Did you blame them for rejecting the Waldorf way of life, or did it seem understandable?

4. Both Judy and Zach are influenced by experiences in which they are confronted with their parents’ sexual misdeeds. Each struggles to reconcile their idealized sense of their parent with their parent’s human failings. In what ways did you feel those experiences affected their choices with each other? In the case of Zach, did you feel that his mother’s affair made an affair with a middle-aged woman seem more natural to him, or only increased his level of guilt about his role in it?

5. In the flashback scenes, Judy’s mother is institutionalized due to mental illness, which leads to Judy’s father’s affair with Kirsten and her own isolation and dependence on Rudi. All of these factors set the stage for her later affair with Zach, which in turn leads to her own unraveling mental state toward the end of the story. Did you sense she was mentally ill throughout the novel, or did the stress of the affair cause her to “crack”? How did her family history of mental illness factor in to your impressions of or sympathy for Judy?

6. On the way back from Ohio, Zach and Judy discuss the song “Mrs. Robinson” and the idea of older women who pursue younger men. While society considers it “creepy” when an older man pursues a young girl, in popular culture it’s often held as funny or tantalizing when an older woman—a “cougar”—does the same with a young man. Do you agree that this double standard exists? Has your perspective changed after reading The Kingdom of Childhood?

7. During the scene in which Zach comes over to spend the night, he reflects on his first kiss with Judy. In the version he remembers, she was the aggressor, which is quite different from the earlier version told from Judy’s point of view in which the kiss is instigated by Zach. Which version did you believe?

8. In Part II, after Zach feels Judy forced herself on him in the car when he was sick, his attitude toward her changes significantly. Still, he continues to be with her. Have you ever had the experience of being in a relationship you knew was toxic while finding it impossible to let the person go?

9. Throughout the story, numerous people—Sandy Valera, Temple, Rhianne—attempt to interfere with the affair (to the extent that they know about it). Yet none is truly successful in making a difference. Did you feel any of these characters pushed too hard, or not hard enough, in their attempts? How do you think they could have been more effective?

10. Although it isn’t mentioned in the book, the story is set around the same time as the real-life conviction of teacher Mary Kay Letourneau for her relationship with a twelve-year-old student. Such cases are not uncommon in the news, and often the perpetrator is a devoted teacher who has a spouse and children. The question always asked is, “Why would she risk everything for an affair with a boy?” Did the story leave you with a different perspective on how these events occur? Do you believe that such relationships are criminal?

11. At the end of the book, did Judy redeem herself to you in any way? Did you feel pity for her? Also at the end of the book, Zach is experiencing the birth of his sister. Did you have the sense that his life would get back on track after this, or that the story’s events would continue to complicate things for him?

Copyright

ISBN: 978-1-4592-1383-8

THE KINGDOM OF CHILDHOOD

Copyright © 2011 by Rebecca Coleman

All rights reserved. Except for use in any review, the reproduction or utilization of this work in whole or in part in any form by any electronic, mechanical or other means, now known or hereafter invented, including xerography, photocopying and recording, or in any information storage or retrieval system, is forbidden without the written permission of the publisher, MIRA Books, 225 Duncan Mill Road, Don Mills, Ontario, Canada M3B 3K9.