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Mellok hadn’t had any such worries, diving eagerly into the enormous meal. His beak snapped and sliced as he dropped morsels into it, swallowing them down in large choking gulps. Wine sloshed from the sides of the goblet he had been given, splashing onto the white sheet, stains forming all around him.

The other dinner guests simply stared at the food, not knowing what to make of it. The three of them were human, though they wore the dull grey uniforms of Council officers, vibrant red lining creeping through the folds and sleeves like escaping blood. One of them had sliced a section of meat off and was sniffing at it worriedly.

Greddog, on the other hand, was happily funnelling vast quantities of the stuff into his gullet, swallowing entire trays in a single mouthful. Huge echoing burps escaped as he did, developing an odd almost musical rhythm of gluttonous swallows and reverberating belches. He quaffed wine by the bottle, simply pouring the whole thing into his mouth before throwing it across the room. The gathered retainers were always there, piling food onto the table and sweeping up broken glass. Greddog was sat in the centre of the table, a vast U-shaped construction, placing the human visitors to his left, with the crew of the Seeker to his right.

“Aileena! You haven’t touched your meal!” Greddog said, his voice booming. “And you haven’t said a word to our other guests. Council officers, here on Ossiark. A first for certain, but I’ve considered forming closer bonds with the Council for a while, especially as their space is so close now after recent conquests.” Greddog lifted a large chunk of meat from some unidentified animal, tearing off strips with his teeth. He gripped it by the bone and waved it around as he spoke. “The Captain says he was here pursuing fugitives from Earth. Says they were here chasing a ship that recently arrived.” Greddog placed his food down and peered towards her, eyes vanishing amongst his rolls of fat. “You wouldn’t know anything about that would you?”

“Can’t say I do,” Aileena said taking a sip of the wine. It stung as it hit her tongue. “I will say it is a pleasure to meet a fellow Captain. I’m sorry I didn’t catch your name?”

“I wouldn’t say you were captain of our, ow!” Mellok got the message, slamming his beak shut as Aileena poked his side with the food-laden knife.

“Orson. Commander Orson,” the older male human said. He was wearing a metal box clipped to his jacket, an earpiece connected by a twisting rubberised cord. “I must say, it has been a… pleasure meeting Greddog here. He was been very welcoming.” Orson waited a moment between each sentence, allowing his translation unit to pump out his words.

“Yes, well, I could have been more accommodating, if I had a rainbow-speaker like Aileena here. Are you sure you won’t sell him to me?” Greddog smiled, revealing his lumpen teeth. It was a sinister grin, heavy with implication.

“Like I’ve said, Mellok is my employer.” Aileena scraped the food from her knife back onto the plate. Any scant appetite she had was gone, Greddog was up to something. Of course, Aileena knew that he was always up to something in a way, you didn’t get to be Pirate Lord of Ossiark by being nice. She decided to take the issue in her hands. “What do you want, Greddog? Can we get to the point?”

Greddog’s smile faded. “Can’t I just give an old friend a nice dinner?”

“Most people yes. You? Absolutely not. What do you want?”

“Fine, fine. Clive!” Greddog waved at the robot, who had been standing perfectly still in the corner. He marched over, his steps rhythmic and regimented. “Clive, play the footage, the one I had you save earlier.”

“Of course, Lord Greddog, anything for you.” Clive turned to face the Council Troopers. “Greetings fellow humans!” He waved at them.

“There is no way that thing is human,” Nguyen whispered under her breath.

“Playing the footage, Lord.” Clive opened his mouth wide, a light growing inside. It poured forth, forming a hologram dancing on the table. It showed Brekt and Michael talking to Mellok and Aileena before walking off. “Of course, all humans are capable of projecting holograms,” Clive said, his mouth not moving as the words crept out.

“No, we really, really aren’t,” Orson said, placed his hands on the sides of his head, fingers running through his short hair. “What the hell is that thing?”

“I am Clive!” the robot said cheerily. “I’m a human from earth!”

“You’re not though? I mean obviously, you aren’t?”

Clive let out a gasp, his hand clasped to his chest, a vaudevillian display of shock. “I can assure you, sir, I am an authentic real human. I have a certificate to prove as such”

“Huh, you haven’t seen a Clive before?” Greddog said, seemingly brushing over the issue of the footage for the moment. “The Council has been sending these out as missionaries. Damn thing is a machine.” Greddog rapped his knuckles against Clive, a loud ringing filling the room. “I would have thought you knew.” Greddog sighed. “We are getting wildly off-topic; my big moment is ruined it seems.” He raised his hand and snapped his fingers. A cluster of retainers appeared quickly, gathering behind Greddog.

“Yes, my Lord?” they asked in unison.

“Impound Aileena’s ship. Oh, and take anything that seems valuable.”

“You scum-sucking sack of fat, what in the Rhythms name do you think you are doing?” Aileena stood up quickly, chair clattering on the stone floor beneath her feet as it fell back. She held the knife outstretched in her hand, and the retainers responded by drawing pistols from somewhere within their robes.

“Oh Aileena, you know me, I just can’t resist something interesting. You arrive here on the run from a Council ship, one that turns out is run by humans, a race that is supposedly sacred.”

“Humans are the natives of Earth, the sacred planet as laid down in the score of prophecy!” Clive said, happily doling out factoids lodged deep within his programming

“Yes, well, imagine my surprise when you also have one on your ship. And that means you lied to me, Aileena. That upsets me.” Greddog placed his hands clasped over his chest. “You wound me Aileena, I thought we were friends?!

“So, you’re planning to hand us in to the Council?” Mellok asked. He had stopped his sloppy eating display, taking on a stern demeanour.

“Yeah, that’s not like you, Greddog. The Council have you scared now they’re on your doorstep?” Aileena eyed her comrade, wondering how much of his display had been mirroring Greddog’s eating, some kind of Cortican diplomacy method.

“Heavens no! Though the thought did occur to me, I do wonder what kind of bounty they would offer up? No. I brought you here Aileena, along with Commander Orson, because I was bored. Woe is the Pirate Lord! There are only so many times you can attend your own casino floor before being allowed to win at everything gets boring. It seemed so smart at the time, why go and steal people’s money, raiding and pillaging, when you can get them to just come and give it to you?”

“If you’re looking for sympathy, you won’t find it from me,” Aileena said. She put the knife down onto her plate, eyeing the pistols held on her cautiously.

“You my dear, are here for one thing, and one thing alone. You and the humans are the after-dinner entertainment.”