Sir Henry never forgot. Whenever I saw him at Allington it was with a cat… not the same one which had kept him alive, but a descendant of that cat; his cat was like a faithful hound; it followed him wherever he went, slept on his bed and was constantly in his company; and to remind himself of how he had been saved, he had pigeons brought to Allington and he said they would be there as long as there were Wyatts in the castle. And the strange thing was that the cat and the pigeons of Allington were friends. They lived together amicably in the castle—symbols of Sir Henry's survival to serve with loyalty the Tudor Kings.
So Mary Wyatt and I were often together at Allington or Hever until I heard that I was to go to France in the service of the King's sister.
So here I was about to embark on this great adventure.
When we arrived at Dover Castle a gale was sweeping in from the sea and white horses were flinging themselves against the white cliffs in an abandon of fury that sent a shiver of alarm through me.
Lady Guildford, who was in charge of us, came to the apartment to which we had been taken and told us that we should not be embarking yet but that we must be prepared to leave as soon as the sea grew calm, which, she stressed, could be at any time.
Seeing us settled in our apartment, she went back to the Princess and I was left with the other ladies who were inclined to look down their aristocratic noses at me. I was considered to be the outsider by my companions, Anne and Elizabeth Grey, the two sisters of the Marquis of Dorset, the sister of Lord Grey and the daughter of Lord Dacre. Who are these Boleyns? they were saying. True, I was the granddaughter of the Duke of Norfolk—he who considered himself more royal than the Tudors—and he had actually been in the cavalcade with his son, the Earl of Surrey, but they had pointedly ignored my father as though to disclaim the family connection; and I supposed these ladies took their cue from the Duke. I had always known that he deplored my mother's marriage into a family which had its roots in trade. So I was of little account—and not only because of my youth.
They talked over my head as though they were quite unaware of my existence. This infuriated me. Who were they? I asked myself. The Greys were descended from Elizabeth Woodville, and who was she before the King married her? I had always liked the story of how he came across her in the forest and had fallen in love with her and secretly married her, and when it was a fait accompli he had confronted his ministers with what he had done. This was the glorious Edward IV, grandfather to our present King, and, as some said, the two were very much alike.
Edward had triumphed in the Wars of the Roses but he was known to be the most profligate man in England, and his mistresses were legion. Our King had not had the same success in battle and he was, I had heard Tom Wyatt say, moderately faithful to his Queen. So perhaps it was only in appearance that they were similar.
I listened avidly to the talk around me.
“I am sorry for the Princess. She is so angry,” said Anne Grey.
“Who would not be, buffeted about like a shuttlecock…fi rst betrothed to one, then to another. And the Princess of all people. We know her temper.”
“I thought the King might relent right at the last moment. He is very indulgent with her.”
“But this is politics. It has to be. I think she is a little glad to escape from Charles. By all accounts he would not have been the bridegroom for her.”
There was laughter. “And you think poor old Louis is?”
“Hush. Lèse majesté. You are speaking of the King of France.”
“Well, even so, everyone knows he is all of fifty-two. Just think of our beautiful Mary with that old man.”
“She will make him dance to her tune.”
“Of course she will. But how angry she is…and how she longs for Suffolk!”
“I was sure at one time the King would give way to her.”
“Oh no… not even to his beloved sister. It is all part of the treaty. That is what royal marriages are about.”
“I long to know what she will do when she sees him.”
“You will. She will let us know. She will let everyone know.”
“When her temper flares out…”
“As it will.”
“But the King loves her well. That is why he is waiting here to say goodbye to her.”
“Perhaps,” said Elizabeth Grey, “he fears that if he does not see her off she will come back to Court … or run off with Suffolk.”
“How she would like to do that!”
“And knowing her, do you think she might attempt it?”
“And so they continued to talk while we were in our beds but I was so tired that I was soon fast asleep.
The next day I came face to face with the Princess herself. She took my chin in her hands and studied me. She was in one of her good moods apparently. “Little Boleyn, is it?” she asked. She added, “Fine eyes you have, child.” And she gave me a little tap on the cheek.
That, said the ladies, was indeed a mark of approval.
I said I was amazed that she should have noticed me.
“Oh, it is only because you are so young,” I was told by Anne Grey. “Lady Guildford is really very put out because you are here. She said did they expect her to look after children.”
I heard one of them whisper something about Thomas Boleyn always being on the lookout for favors.
But it did not worry me unduly that I was resented. Everything was so novel to me and to be here in the castle waiting for the wind to change, being ready to embark at short notice, was very exciting.
The time came at four o'clock on the morning of 2 October. Everyone had been growing more and more uneasy the longer we stayed, for the year was advancing and October was notorious for its gales. We should have waited for the spring, but matters of state have to be concluded, whatever the time.
I shall never forget that voyage. I thought it was the end of my life and that I should never see France. We had not gone more than a few miles when the storm arose and the fleet was scattered. Never in my wildest imaginings had I thought of anything like this. The ladies were terrified; and Lady Guildford hovered round the Princess, who seemed less concerned than the rest of us.
I realized then how she must be dreading her marriage for she cried out, laughing rather wildly: “I rejoice for perhaps I shall not be Queen of France after all, Mother Guildford.” She always called Lady Guildford “Mother” because they had been together since the Princess's childhood.
How unhappy one must be to welcome death! But later I realized that she, who was so full of life, would cling to it with her entire being; it was just her reckless and extravagant way of talking. The Princess Mary could not be quietly sad, she had to be tragically so and let everyone know it.
So we were flung about—too frightened to feel even the horrible sickness which had begun to affect most of us. We could think only of one thing: death in that angry sea.
We were making for Boulogne—I heard later that some of the ships put in at Calais and some even went to Flanders—and the ordeal seemed to go on for hours. Then suddenly someone called: “Land!”
But that was not the end of our troubles. The Captain could not get the ship into the harbor and we ran aground outside it. But at least we felt comparatively safe then, for although we were still surrounded by sea we could see people watching on the shore.
We were all on deck, drenched to the skin, our hair wildly flying, and soon they were sending out little boats to bring us in. One gallant gentleman waded out and shouted that he would carry the Queen ashore. Mary was lowered into his arms and we watched him take her to dry land.