PATRIOT God knows, if you compare it with our crown, for instance—!
SUBSCRIBER The lira has crashed as well — by 30 percent!
PATRIOT And our crown fortunately only double that.
SUBSCRIBER Apropos of Italy, did you read this morning about the chaos down there already? The Messagero complains about inadequate refuse collections in Rome. What a characteristic light that throws on conditions there—
PATRIOT Just compare that with our streets in Vienna! As if they’re any dirtier in wartime than in peace! Have you ever read a single word of complaint on that subject in any of our papers? Well, at most the occasional feature in the Presse—about “The Refuse Collector and the Horsefly”, say — but even that is interesting!
SUBSCRIBER And those are grievances already remedied in part. Didn’t you read where it said “Some Refuse Collectors Laid Off”? There you are!
PATRIOT And what do you say about England, then?
SUBSCRIBER Their potato prices have shot up dramatically.
PATRIOT Yes, and it even turns out they’re still lower there now than ours were before the war. Just imagine!
SUBSCRIBER And what about the way our civilian detainees are treated in Russian camps? Did you read about how they’re made to suffer? While it’s common knowledge how we pamper our Russian prisoners of war!
PATRIOT And how do they thank us? By taking the most flagrant liberties, of course! I heard they were put to digging trenches in Tyrol on the Brenner, just to keep them occupied. And what do you think they did? They refuse! Well, they got short shrift for that, of course. A detachment is sent from Innsbruck, they’re asked again if they’ll dig the trenches. “No!” they say. Guns are levelled. Well, what did they expect? Did they think we’d have any scruples? Forget international law. There’s a war on. But mugs that they are, our men, they still show restraint and ask them again, the rebels. “No!” they say. We take aim. Then, of course — you should have seen it, all at once everyone is volunteering, yes, they’ll dig the trenches. In a flash they’re scrambling to start digging — and that’s that. All of them except for four, that is. Who are shot, of course. Naturally. Among them an officer cadet — just listen to this—
SUBSCRIBER I’m listening.
PATRIOT Probably their ringleader. Had the cheek to launch into a harangue against Austria, up there in the mountain. Probably an anti-Semite. Just listen—
SUBSCRIBER I’m listening.
PATRIOT The men — our men, I mean, those with their heart in the right place — were too worked up when they fired, they simply couldn’t hit their target, so the captain had to help out in person and shot all four with his service revolver. So what do you say now about the liberties the Russians take with us?
SUBSCRIBER They take with us? The liberties they take with Austrian prisoners of war back home, would be more like it. In case you haven’t read what it says today, here, I’ve got it with me, listen: Russian troops misappropriate prisoners of war to participate in hostilities. The War Press Bureau writes: Since the Russians were driven out of Galicia, scarcely a day passes without the discovery of a further hitherto unreported infringement of international law by Russian troops, with the result that it is now certain there is hardly a single article of the rules of war which has not been trampled underfoot by the Russians.
PATRIOT A nice state of affairs!
SUBSCRIBER Just listen to this—
PATRIOT I’m listening.
SUBSCRIBER Thus, it has now been ascertained through investigations by the rural constabulary in formerly occupied parts of Galicia, that following a directive of the Russian army commanders, for the entire duration of the occupation, all men and women fit for any kind of work — except when needed for other tasks — were forcibly enlisted, specifically, to dig ditches—
PATRIOT Is that what it says?!
SUBSCRIBER —and were deported for that purpose as far away as the Carpathians. The fact that the enemy were expressly forbidden by the Hague Conventions to demand services from the peaceful inhabitants of an occupied territory — labour which is tantamount to fighting against their own country — naturally didn’t trouble the Russians in the slightest.
PATRIOT Didn’t trouble them! Scum!
SUBSCRIBER But listen to this—
PATRIOT I’m listening.
SUBSCRIBER Consequently, it is no wonder — as has now been likewise established — that the Russians also misappropriate members of the Austro-Hungarian army who find themselves their prisoners of war to do construction work that can be used against us.
PATRIOT Outrageous! Exactly the same case!
SUBSCRIBER —although this equally contravenes the Hague accords, according to which prisoners of war may not be used for work in any way connected with military operations. By curious coincidence, the 82nd Austro-Hungarian Infantry Regiment recently took a Russian base that members of the same regiment had been forced to build as prisoners of war. The following inscription in Hungarian was found there on a wooden paneclass="underline" “This base was built by Hungarian Transylvanians of the 82nd Infantry Regiment.” To the recently reported forcible expulsion of Austrian citizens from their homeland can now be added this forcible involvement of Austro-Hungarian citizens in the hostilities against their fatherland — not as a riposte but as a strategic reinforcement on the part of the Russians. Well, what do you say to that?
PATRIOT Typically Russian! Unheard of! And certainly not a riposte, but a strategic reinforcement, no two ways about it! And our poor Austrian soldiers — it’s unlikely a single one dared refuse.
SUBSCRIBER Do you think everyone has the chutzpah of that Russian officer cadet?
PATRIOT To launch into a harangue against the state, right at the top of the mountain!
SUBSCRIBER Slap bang in the Carpathians!
PATRIOT What do you mean, the Carpathians? At the top of the Brenner!
SUBSCRIBER At the top of the Brenner! You really have to admit, not a day passes without such dizzy contrasts. Poles apart!
PATRIOT That was an excellent article of Professor Brockhausen’s, where he writes that defenceless prisoners have never been harassed here, even with words.
SUBSCRIBER He was right. Wasn’t it in the same issue of the Presse where the commandant of Lemberg disclosed that Russian prisoners being transported through the streets were abused and beaten with sticks by some members of the public? He stated emphatically that such behaviour was unworthy of a civilized nation.
PATRIOT So he acknowledged that we are a civilized nation, a cultured people, and not just the Jews.
SUBSCRIBER Just so. But really, there’s not a single issue on which we wouldn’t act differently to our enemies, who are after all the very dregs of mankind.
PATRIOT For example, the civilized language we use, even when speaking of the enemy, who are after all the greatest scum on God’s earth.
SUBSCRIBER And above all, unlike them we are always humane. For example, an editorial in the Presse even talked about good times ahead for the fish and crustacea in the Adriatic, with so many Italian corpses to feed on. Is that not the very height of humanity, to be mindful of the fish and crustacea in the Adriatic in these bitterly hard times, when even human beings are starving!
PATRIOT Yes, exaggerated perhaps, as he often is. But — there are no half-measures with him! And it’s not only our humanity in war that they lack, but something far more valuable — endurance! Look at them: despondency already reigns supreme. They’d be glad if it was all over. As for us—?
SUBSCRIBER That struck me as well. For instance, the defeatism in France!
PATRIOT Dejection in England!