“What happened the night your dad died?” he asked abruptly, slightly disturbed by the truth he’d heard in her words.
She looked back out the window. “I’m not sure.”
She’s lying. He waited.
“We were high,” she finally said. “I wanted to believe it was a dream.”
“You and who?”
Fierce eyes met his. “My friend doesn’t remember anything. And Harlan never saw her, so he doesn’t know she was there. I didn’t bring her into it back then, and I won’t now.” She swallowed hard. “From what I can put together, my friend and I had returned to my house in the middle of the night. I’m not sure why. Somehow she drove us there and back, both of us high as kites.”
“You’re lucky you didn’t kill anyone.”
Guilt flashed.
“You didn’t kill anyone,” Zander told her, understanding she felt partially responsible for her parents’ deaths in some twisted way.
She didn’t appear convinced. “I think we’d come to the house to sneak in and get some more pot from my room.”
“You kept pot in your bedroom?” Emily was right. Tara was there that night.
“I was a teenager.” She frowned. “With very snoopy sisters, I knew how to hide things. I don’t think either one ever found it.”
“What did you see outside?”
Tara took a deep breath. “I don’t remember seeing my father, but I think I remember several men outside the house and having an overwhelming need to hide from them. I don’t know why—it was just a feeling. Something evil hovered. I remember telling my friend to run and that we needed to leave. I can still feel my hands pushing branches out of the way and smell the smoke.” A haunted look entered her eyes. “I didn’t see a fire. I don’t remember leaving or riding back to my friend’s home. The next morning I convinced myself it was just a dream. Then the police came before I asked my friend about it. Her reaction to the police was pure shock, so I knew she didn’t remember.”
“Was your mother outside that night?”
Tara frowned. “I never saw her. I heard she was asleep until Emily woke everyone.”
“But Harlan saw you that night.”
“He did. I didn’t know until he came to me two days later. By then I’d convinced myself I hadn’t been there, and I had a hard time believing his accusation.”
“You’re lucky you’re alive. He has a habit of killing the people he believes can cause trouble for him.”
Her face reddened, and she dropped her gaze.
Oh shit.
“You were involved with him,” he said flatly, his stomach churning at the thought. “He’s got to be twenty years older than you—and you were a kid.”
“I was eighteen,” she snapped. “People looked at me as an adult—especially men. Do you know how many men had propositioned me by the time I was sixteen? Married men. Men old enough to be my grandfather.”
“I’m sorry—”
“Not your fault. But it made me view myself differently, you know? I believed they wanted me because I was special. The attention felt good. After a while I sought it out. At least Harlan wasn’t married.”
“Harlan told you he saw you in the woods the night of your father’s death. Then what?”
“He told me to leave town and never return, or he’d kill my sisters and mother.” Her gaze was steady, her voice monotone.
That sounds like the Harlan I know.
“You got a free pass because of your relationship.”
“My life has not been a free pass.” Fire shone in her eyes. “Do you know what it’s like to believe the man you slept with murdered your father? And I fully believed he killed my mother until Emily told me otherwise—it still hasn’t sunk in that she committed suicide. Back then her death was the proof that he was serious. My sisters would be his next targets. As I got older, I knew my husband and my daughter could be targets.”
“I find it hard to believe you simply packed up and left Bartonville.”
One eyebrow rose. “That’s exactly what I did. When I told people I was leaving, no one seemed too surprised.” She forced a laugh. “I had a reputation as a wild child. A slut. My parents were at their wits’ end with me. People were happy to see me go.”
“Your sisters weren’t happy. Neither were your aunts.”
“Doesn’t matter now.” Her voice cracked and pain flashed.
“Are you going to leave again?”
“No,” she said firmly. “For the first time in twenty years, I feel like I can breathe. I no longer have to look over my shoulder or fear that my daughter will be killed.” She tipped her head, wonder in her eyes. “You have no idea how different the world looks to me today. I don’t know what to do with myself because I’m not focused on hiding. Two decades of ingrained thought patterns suddenly have no purpose. On one hand I feel free . . . on the other I’ve lost the impetus that drove my every action for years.”
“You will find new things to strive for. Your sisters, your aunts, a new world for your daughter.”
“I will, but it will take some getting used to. Bella deserves to know her family and vice versa, so we’ll spend lots of time here on the coast in the future. I’ve missed it.” Her face softened. “There’s nothing like the smell of the ocean. I’ve avoided the entire coast since I left.”
“Your family will be glad to have you back.”
“Emily and I have talked, and we have a lot of catching up to do. I’ve missed so much. When I thought Harlan was about to kill me on that overlook, I was angry. Angry that he’d made me lose my mother and father and then twenty years with the family I had left.”
“Did Emily tell you she refused to search for you all that time?”
“No.” Surprise registered in her eyes.
“She was worried you were involved with your father’s death. She saw you outside that night, and then you left town. She was afraid to discover the truth of why you left.”
Tara was silent.
“Madison looked for you when she got older. She’d argue with Emily because she refused to help, but Emily never told Madison of her suspicions about your involvement.”
“That’s a heavy burden to carry for two decades,” Tara whispered.
“In a twisted bit of logic, she was trying to protect you.”
Tara sniffed and wiped her eyes.
“Both Madison and Emily are overjoyed to have you in their lives again. Bella too.”
“They’re good sisters,” Tara said. Her gaze turned curious. “And what about you? Will you be around too?”
He blinked. “I work in Portland.”
She shot him a withering glance. “I’m asking about Emily. The air crackles whenever you two are in the same room.”
He grinned. Apparently Tara spoke her mind like Emily did. “That’s up to her.”
“Maybe you should persuade her.”
“I’m working on it.”
“Are you staying for tea?”
“I wouldn’t miss it.”
39
“I hired two waitresses. I think they’ll work out,” Madison told Emily as they waited at the table for the aunts to finish up whatever surprise they were making in the kitchen for tea. Emily looked almost back to normal. She had crutches to keep the weight off her injured calf, and the bandage in her hair was gone. They’d shaved part of her scalp when they stitched up the cut from her accident, but her hair covered almost all of it.
Madison had almost lost another sister. Twice.