We moved as fast as we could, but the tree roots made the going hard. Not just for us, thank the Lady, but it was terrifying trying to move at speed over treacherous ground in the dark. I clutched my knife for comfort, but I had already learned it was no use.
We were just at the edge of the clearing when I heard a sound behind me. I turned around, trying to see through the border of shadow. "Rella?"
"I'm here, girl, save your breath. That wasn't me. Go on into the firelight." And we were in the clearing. Jamie threw more branches on the fire and it blazed enough for us to have a look around. Nothing to be seen. I stopped Varien and made him look at me. "Are you hurt?"
"No more than I was before, dearling," he said. He turned away and found his sword lying by his pack. He drew it, saying ruefully, "Wisdom learned late is better than none, is it not, Jamie?"
"Keep your eyes on the trees, man," said Jamie, scanning the undergrowth for movement. "And remember what I told you, keep your sword raised, if it's halfway through the stroke by the time you start you're ahead of your enemy."
Rella stood, as did Jamie, with her back to the fire, "You take north, I'll take south, eh Master?" she said. Jamie just grunted assent.
I wish I could say I was thrilled at the prospect of battle-certainly the ballad singers would have it that way. Idiots. They've never been able to understand one simple thing. I'm terrible with a blade, and even then I knew it. I'm not one of the Warrior Women of Arlis, much though I might have wanted to be, and I was afraid. In the dark, the four of us against who knew how many—in fact I feared it was more like two against the enemy, for I thought Varien not much more use than me.
We are all mistaken from time to time.
Certainly when the four of them burst through the trees, every man of them armed with swords and shields and coming straight at me, it took all my courage to hold my dagger ready and not run. "Hells' teeth," I muttered; then my blessed temper rose past my fear and I yelled something at them. I've no idea what I said, to be honest, but it did seem to stop some of them, or at least slow them down.
Just before they came through into the clearing, I saw out of the corner of my eye that Varien was holding his sword exactly as I'd taught him, very correct, looking like the greenest of recruits.
They came in from the side nearest Lanen, across the fire from me. The second they showed themselves Rella was moving, looking for the best way in, as I was. And Lanen?
When I saw they were all headed for her I despaired. If they were really determined to kill her they'd probably succeed before we could do anything. Then she yelled, my own Lanen, in pure fury, "Stop where you are, you bloody bastards! Any closer and you're all dead men!"
I nearly laughed. Some of them stopped, and Rella had long enough to throw a knife—flat, deadly. He dropped and barely even gurgled as he died. I thought that might slow them down, but no. Fools.
The big one came straight on to seize Lanen, but suddenly Varien was in his way. Varien tried to strike with his sword, of course, but I'd not had time to teach him about targes, and all of them had those little shields that are so useful in hand-to-hand battle. I couldn't watch, for I was faced with one of my own to worry about, but Lanen told me later how it had gone.
Varien was hard put to it in his first swordfight. I tried to distract the bastard but he kept fighting Varien. When he realised how badly Varien handled a sword he laughed. "Fool!" he cried, dodging even a fairly well-aimed blow easily. "Give it up. She'll feed the demons no matter what you do."
I thought I was the only idiot stupid enough to throw away my sword, but when Varien heard those words he did just that. I heard what could only be called a hiss as his sword clattered on the ground, and he was inside the other's guard in the very instant, his hand drawn back to strike. I saw him put his whole body into the blow, direct to the face. There was a sickening crack as the man's neck snapped backwards and he dropped.
Varien roared, turning to the nearest foe, the one fighting Jamie. He struck him from behind, sending the man reeling forward full onto Jamie's sword. Then suddenly I wasn't watching anymore, because the last of them had turned from fighting Rella to seize me from behind. I felt a knife at my throat and heard him yell, "Move and she's dead!"
Everything stopped.
"Drop your swords!" ordered the voice. He stood directly behind me. Jamie and Rella threw their swords on the ground. Varien just watched, his eyes never moving from his prey.
"She's no good to your master dead, you know," said Jamie quietly.
"She's no good to you dead either. Keep back and she'll live," he growled, backing up and pulling me along.
And there I was, helpless again until he stumbled on a tree root and lost his balance. I pushed back and fell on top of him as hard as I could. I heard the breath go out of him all at once. He lost interest in holding the knife at my throat and I scrambled up, getting out of the way so that Jamie could grab him.
Except that Jamie was too slow.
In one movement Varien, growling, hauled the leader of the mercenaries upright by the front of his tunic and hit him full in the face with the heel of his hand. The man went limp instantly. Varien dropped him as if he hadn't existed and came to me. "Lanen," he said, taking my hand gently.
"Shia save us. How in the Hells did you know to do that?" breathed Jamie.
"I have no claws, but my arms have much of their old strength," said Varien. "It seemed to work, in any case."
Rella and I moved the bodies deep into the woods. Even as I dragged away the poor dead mercs, even as my soul burned within me in the private darkness at having killed again, though it were only to save my own life, I clung to one solid rock in all the shifting sand of this cursed night. Lanen had not killed anyone. The worst she'd done was fall on to a man who held a knife at her throat.
Thank the Goddess for that.
Lanen hadn't killed.
That was when it started, right after that terrible fight in the dark. I'd never been so near to death before, feeling it all around, knowing that only by harming others could you survive. It was awful.
Ah, now, speak truth, Lanen: it was awful after I realised Varien had killed the one who held a knife at my throat, and that he was the last. I had felt a fierce rush of joy when I saw him drop. You can't help but delight in a victory that means you're going to live, but death is death and when I saw four bodies that had but moments before been living men—well, my supper hadn't been much to keep down anyway.
It was late when we were all gathered again round the fire. Jamie insisted on setting a watch, just in case there were others we didn't know about. All of us who weren't on watch slept like stones, but with our weapons in our hands.
Exhaustion caught up with me as I lay thinking about the dead men away there in the woods. My last thought was that, dreadful as their deaths were, they had attacked us and would have killed us if they could. I slept better than I thought I would, but all night I kept thinking I heard voices.
I roused early, as you do sleeping rough, and if it was possible I think I was wearier on waking than I'd been on going to sleep. The voices murmuring in the back of my mind were a little easier to ignore now I was awake, but they hadn't stopped. I wasn't about to mention this to anyone. I thought at the time I was imagining the ghosts of the dead men cursing at us, so I resolved to ignore it.
I was also hungry enough to know that food was going to be the most difficult thing about this part of our journey, now that we did not need to fear immediate attack. We had brought some food with us but there was very little to spare, and we were a long way from the nearest market. Breakfast was oats cooked in water with a little salt. I had been chilled through from sleeping on the ground, and I felt gnawed with hunger, but still the heat I got from it was a damn sight better than the taste.